Is the father of your baby trying to control your every move like mine?

Allie - posted on 03/30/2010

TALK TO HIM! tell him.. 'you ask me to wear this.. you do this'... make sure to quote him... and then say... when you do that it makes me feel.... *like you are trying to controll me* etc.. tell him... exactly what you hear him say to you in his words.. and exactly how YOU feel he means it.. but when you talk about how you feel about it.. make sure you say htey are YOUR feelings.. then ASK him what he intends to do/say/mean. he may say.. 'oh my, really?' 'all i meant was i love it when you wear... cause you look so sexy in it' or 'it makes me jealous when we go out and other guys stare at you' those things will help you understand.. do that with everything that you are concerned about.... he may jsut be trying to take care of you and not realise he's doing this.. in that case when you tell him how he is comming across he should listen to you and start to change for the better. if he says.. do it cause i want you to... then listen to the warning signs of an abusive relationship. if he gets offended or shuts you down when you try to talk to him about it, write him a letter or email telling him how you feel. give him a chance to read it while he's not by your side and relax then reply.. i had to do this myself at one point.. my hubby got offended when i tried to talk, but when i put it into words in an e-mail and asked him to read it 4 hours before i saw him again that day.. then he listened to it and had a chance to reply.. instead of react. if he is abusive with you though... walk away.. actualy.. run.

Mellissa - posted on 03/21/2010

Hon, if he is not even trying, get rid of him. Pregnancy is hard enough without someone treating you this way. If he didn't act this way before you got pregnant, chances are things will only get worse. Talk to him and express your concerns. If this doesn't help, then leave him. There are better people out there for you to get support from if this is the way he is going to be. Good luck and remember, the baby is most important.

Nicole - posted on 03/21/2010

no and i will never have this problem. hunnie you are your own person and he shouldnt have a say in what you do say or wear....if he has a problem with that then he has major issues like the father of my child

Ashley - posted on 03/21/2010

Well, he has 2 jobs during the week and we dont live together so i only really get to see him once a week so it has been kind of hard. But he also doesnt stay very long on Sunday. After we wake up we will go get breakfast somewhere then he will come bak to my house and sit for a while then leave. It seems like he's not really trying to make an effort.

Brandy - posted on 03/20/2010

I don't have this problem but I was wondering, how involved in the pregnancy is he? I'm just asking because if he isn't getting to touch your tummy lots and help put together the nursery and go to dr. appointments with you, then he may be trying to involve himself in other ways that are unwelcome. Make sure you ask him to be involved even if he says no to some things and when you are talking about what you are going to do when the baby come, ask for his opinions on the matter too.