partner says no to home birth!

Chelle - posted on 12/05/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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i didnt have an easy labour last time but i was in the safety of a hospital. but not all births are the same and i thought i might give it a go at home because i felt uncomfy in hospital and id like to be at home. i know of it didnt all go to plan at home i could go right to hospital. but the other half says its a big no no having a home birth. i dont really know what to say or think about what he said.....shouldnt i get the final say on where i pop my baby out!?

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Amy - posted on 12/10/2009

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You should have the final say, however do you have a back up plan in case something does go wrong? If you talk to your dr or midwife about what happens if something goes wrong, and try to come up with a plan, maybe specific warning signs to look for? That way your partner feels a little more secure about your choice to do a home birth.

Do you know if there's a clinic designed to be more like a homebirth near you? I was talking to my sister in law and her husband (All about natural stuff), and they were telling me about a place about 30 min away that was more of a home setting where you can be more comfortable than a hospital. Something like that may make you both feel better (although they may not be one near you).

You may also want to discuss with your partner to see if there is anything you can do to make him feel more comfortable about your decision to have a home birth. If he's not comfortable with it he may be thinking about your and your child's safety and not fully be there for you.

Emma - posted on 12/10/2009

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i had my baby at home at first my partner thought i was nuts but after we talked to the midwife he fully supported me take ur partner to an app with a home birth midwife let him ask as many questions as he needs to and make sure u tell him how being in the hospital made u feel also if u have the baby at home u can be close to ur other child at the end of the day it is ur decision but its always good to have ur partners support if u do decide to have a home birth i suggest a water birth it takes so much of the pressure away i had such and easy labour and birth of my son and he was 10pound and i believe it was becasue i was comfortable in my own home i trusted my midwives and i had the water supporting the weight of my body seriously look into it but in due march with my 2nd and im doing it all the same i wouldnt change a thing good luck

D - posted on 12/06/2009

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Check out the local midwife, go to an open house event together so he can ask questions, check out some natural birthing classes (bradley birthing classes are one idea). You do have the ultimate say but you want all the support you can get and if he's fighting you on it then you will have a hard time. My husband was against it until we toured a birthcenter and met the local midwife then he was okay with it. We are delivering in a hospital though because of gestational diabeties (SP).

Stefie - posted on 12/05/2009

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I know that there are some very serious health concerns for home births. For many many women they are totally fine, however there are risks you should talk to your doctor, midwife, and partner about. Please get all of the facts so you know going into it what your risks are.

Jacinta - posted on 12/05/2009

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me and my partner wanted one because we had a beautiful birth in the birth cente. I didnt know how much it cost and by the time i got round to asking my hospital midwife is she done them i thought it would be to late to organise one. She didnt doesnt do them and i really wanted the same midwife so in the end iv choosen to go to hospital, but stay at home for as long as possible again. if you want one do it it your body and your baby and if you feel confident i dont see why not as you said before you can always go to hosp. if you need to!

good luck

hope you have the birth you want

take care

jacinta

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