Empty Nest gives me the Creeps!!!

Patricia - posted on 11/30/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

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The thought of never being any kids around to school shop for...wake up for school...take to the doctors..ask Mommy to kiss their boo boo away.........is tearing me apart!!!

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Mer - posted on 09/13/2012

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@Patricia and Leesa...to say it gives you the creeps is kind of a good way of expressing the feelings of loneliness and fear you feel. Not for losing your children as they move into adulthood, but Fear cause suddenly you don't feel necessary anymore. In my case, I got into a very dark place and felt like my usefulness as an at home Mom had suddenly run out. What would I do with tons of time when my husband was away at work and there was no one around to pick up after or to give lunches, or run errands for. I was terribly sad and saw an abyss of loneliness ahead. So once I identified where this sick punched in the stomach feeling came from, I was able to "try" to reinvent myself, and remember all the pre-kids things I had dreamed of doing. It has helped a little, and also, instead of relying on my kids so much for daily support, and love, my husband and I have re-connected. I expect that will bring the most healing when we can try and pick up on those things we did before kids, and the kids themselves aren't quite that grown up yet. They will still need our advice and support. You don't Stop being a Mom or Dad.

Leesa - posted on 08/11/2011

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I have always been a at home mom, and when both my kids left the house to start their own life I felt lost and still have not figured out what to do with my time

Kathy - posted on 08/03/2011

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One of mine has left the nest a long time ago, and I still have a teen at home. I am going to be a grandma for the 1st time thanks to my daughter and her hubby, and Im excited, I think it will fill the 'empty hole' the empty nest feels like. Drs appts were never fun for me, and school activities could be fun but wearing one out, my son is in marching band so lots of travel and support for the band...I wouldnt think much about the empty nest if its in the future, but if you are facing it now , relax , enjoy the kinds of things you did before the kids came, spent time with your significant other, your friends, and spoil yourself until grandkids arrive then you;ll spoil them and get to send them HOME!

Nicole - posted on 02/09/2011

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Hun, i think your missing a little grammar there - your message is hard to read and doesnt make sense.

but i think you are saying that your kids have left home or that you are trying for a little one but struggling?
if you are struggling to concieve, there are loads of women in the same boat, you are far from alone in this struggle. As draining and soul drenching as it is, there are groups you can join that can help you through this. even if its just to share your frustration with. but generally they share things they did that finally worked for them and become cycle buddies etc... take a look at babycentre.com or .co.uk
i have been a part of this ttc (trying to concieve) community for many years - there is a group of 40 girls that i speak to on a daily basis and we share everything about our lives. they have helped me through the hard times and confided in me and eachother for so long now.

if you are mentioning that your children have left home and you are feeling 'useless' keep in mind that you have been running after their gorgeous bums for years now! it might feel a little strange to have so much time for yourself.. but thats just what it is - so book yourself in for a rose massage and facial and give your body some TLC for all those years you had to put her last in line xxxx

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