I'd like to give some advice about "potty training"

Estelle - posted on 02/06/2009 ( 18 moms have responded )

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Potty training seems to be a subject so many mums want advice about. I say if you wait until an appropriate age then there will be no training involved just cooperation and achievement! If you are thinking about or a being pressured into "training" your child my advice would be STOP and wait. Two and a half is the earliest any parent should be thinking about taking their child out of nappies. If you wait until this age and even older then what you have is a child with better bladder/bowel contol, a child who is curious or even enthusiastic about coming out of nappies and a child who doesn't have a fear of the potty/toilet. You see if you wait that little bit longer there is NO training involved, they do it willingly. Good Luck x

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Megan - posted on 03/09/2009

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i disagree bout waiting til they are older my son is 2 and out of nappies during the day and he is using the toilet quiet well it is really up to the parent and there children on when they wanna start toilet training and its really when they feel comfortable if they wanna use it at 1 and a half 2 years thats great

Karen - posted on 03/07/2009

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My little girl sat on a potty and went #2 when she was 16 months because she ask to use it and then ignored the thing until about a month ago. She turned 2 in feb. Then she started telling me when she has to pee. She demands to use the big potty like mommy though and is excited about her new panties. We are just taking it slow and letting her get used to everything. If it takes a while no big. I wasn't planning to potty train until later but she wants to and I am very glad she started this on her own. I makes it much easier and not scary for her.

Lisa - posted on 03/05/2009

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Ok. I just want to add my story. Both my kids decided they were interested in going on the potty at around 2 yrs.



My method is that I let them go on the potty when they want to and help to go by themself ( stool and potty seat on the regular toilet)



I don't pressure them. I am a stay at home mom and often when we are at home I let them run around with out clothes and they will run to the potty. When we go out of course my 2 yr old get diapers still and at night.



My 3 yr old is in underwear during the day and pull ups during the night. For my 3 yr old I remind him more often because he understands what to do completely and is pretty good, just when he is in the  middle of something he isn't quite ready to stop to go on the potty. If we go out, I bring a change of clothes just in case.



 

Maraea - posted on 02/17/2009

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Quoting Laura:

Thank you!!!! My son just turned 2 a couple of weeks ago, and my MIL has been bugging me to potty train him since he was 14 months!! I was going to wait until he was about 2 1/2, because I don't want it to be a fight, also, I know he's not ready.


Laura I know how you feel my MIL has been pressuring me too and we had to live with her for 2 months after I just had my daughter (our house was a constuction zone) and she was trying to "train" my son and one day I heard her tell him he was naughty for doing poos in his nappy! That was the end of her potty training my son I instantly told her she was wrong for telling him he was naughty and to never tell him that again and to chose her words more carefully. I think it is our childrens choice wether they want to go on the potty or in their nappy, why are we trying to make them grow up so fast anyway?

Nat - posted on 02/16/2009

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my son is nearly 2 and he started using the potty himself at 19mths old he is out off nappys day and night and just gose to use the potty wen ever he needs 2

Stephanie - posted on 02/16/2009

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I have a 3 yr old along with the one that just turned 2 and my 3 yr old wants to still wear diapers. He would rather play with his toys than go potty. He isn't scared of the potty or anything at this point it is just he does not want to get up and go. And advise on motivation for this?

Estelle - posted on 02/12/2009

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Quoting Liseandra:



My daughter just turned two on the first and shes just about fully trained. shes doing amazing, she''ll tell me when she needs to go and she'll go, shes been wearing pull ups and sometimes little panties, and she hasnt had any accidents yet.. so YAY!!!!!
I dont agree with waiting until their older and it'll just happen, that might work for some parents, which is great... but the way i see it is that the faster shes outta diapers, the better.  my daughter started occasionally peeing in the potty this last summer, and she has a cousin that is 10 days younger than her that has two bigger brothers, and her mom was amazed/shocked at how well Kristalyn (my daughter) was already wanting to use the potty, and said she waited until her boys were just about three to even introduce the potty to them.  in my mind thats to old and again the faster their outta diapers the better.  they'll let you know when their ready to start. i always brought my daughter into the bathroom when i went, and she got curious and more curious,  until one day she grabbed the toilet paper and tried to wipe ME and said "mom let istain(thats how she says her name) wipe your bum! ha it was sweet, and thats when i deicded that i was gonna try it out.. and she did it... occasionally at first, then as time went on she got better at it, and now shes pretty much potty trained.....   Idunno thats just the way i see it at least.






 






Also Rebecca, where did you find "In the night garden" panties???? my daughter LOVES that show, i can only find Dora (which i have for her) and princess and hello kitty....





Liseandra, My point in letting mums know it is okay to wait is that it takes the pressure off. If you were successful in the training of your child then I congratulate you. Also you say that "It'll just happen" every child has there own timetable to do these transistions and for the parent to push their will on a child is just plain cruel. Your child transitioned because she was ready which worked out well for you BUT can you imagine if she had not been ready and you still tryed at that age? She showed the signs as did the other mum's daughter who was around 2years.You have to be conscientious enough to pick up on the signs and if you do then your child will have success and that will have come in an environmnet of nutrure and not one of stress and upset.



Again I congratulate you in your success but just remember we don't need to set the bar to high. Happy parenting X



 

[deleted account]

My daughter just turned two on the first and shes just about fully trained. shes doing amazing, she''ll tell me when she needs to go and she'll go, shes been wearing pull ups and sometimes little panties, and she hasnt had any accidents yet.. so YAY!!!!!
I dont agree with waiting until their older and it'll just happen, that might work for some parents, which is great... but the way i see it is that the faster shes outta diapers, the better.  my daughter started occasionally peeing in the potty this last summer, and she has a cousin that is 10 days younger than her that has two bigger brothers, and her mom was amazed/shocked at how well Kristalyn (my daughter) was already wanting to use the potty, and said she waited until her boys were just about three to even introduce the potty to them.  in my mind thats to old and again the faster their outta diapers the better.  they'll let you know when their ready to start. i always brought my daughter into the bathroom when i went, and she got curious and more curious,  until one day she grabbed the toilet paper and tried to wipe ME and said "mom let istain(thats how she says her name) wipe your bum! ha it was sweet, and thats when i deicded that i was gonna try it out.. and she did it... occasionally at first, then as time went on she got better at it, and now shes pretty much potty trained.....   Idunno thats just the way i see it at least.



 



Also Rebecca, where did you find "In the night garden" panties???? my daughter LOVES that show, i can only find Dora (which i have for her) and princess and hello kitty....

Ann - posted on 02/10/2009

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Thank you to all of you Mom's giving your storie's of her you deal with potty training your children , My daughter Emiy will be 2 yrs. old this weekend (Feb 14th) she has been interested in the big Toielt for several month's now, she will go up to it and lift the lid and say PEE-PEE, POOPY and Potty, so I thought well I don't want to rush this BUT I went out and bought her a potty chair and a DVD(POTTY POWER) to help her along, the DVD help's out alot and the potty sit's in her room,. when she goes up to it and say's potty or pee pee then I'll pull her pant's down and have her sit on it , nothing has happened YET , But that's OK, I don't want to rush this on her or put any pressure on her either, when she is ready I know it will happen, I think her knowing it's there does give her some incouragement ...to go potty instead of in her diaper...GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE!!!!

Ann - posted on 02/10/2009

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Thank you to all of you Mom's giving your storie's of her you deal with potty training your children , My daughter Emiy will be 2 yrs. old this weekend (Feb 14th) she has been interested in the big Toielt for several month's now, she will go up to it and lift the lid and say PEE-PEE, POOPY and Potty, so I thought well I don't want to rush this BUT I went out and bought her a potty chair and a DVD(POTTY POWER) to help her along, the DVD help's out alot and the potty sit's in her room,. when she goes up to it and say's potty or pee pee then I'll pull her pant's down and have her sit on it , nothing has happened YET , But that's OK, I don't want to rush this on her or put any pressure on her either, when she is ready I know it will happen, I think her knowing it's there does give her some incouragement ...to go potty instead of in her diaper...GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE!!!!

Estelle - posted on 02/10/2009

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Trust your motherly instincts not your motherly in law's! lol You know your child better than ANYBODY else as you have the lions share of his time. When your child is ready to progress with this stage of his development the signs will be there. It should be a smooth transition from nappy to toilet with no stress worry or concern. My best of luck to you. Happy Parenting x

Laura - posted on 02/10/2009

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Thank you!!!! My son just turned 2 a couple of weeks ago, and my MIL has been bugging me to potty train him since he was 14 months!! I was going to wait until he was about 2 1/2, because I don't want it to be a fight, also, I know he's not ready.

Estelle - posted on 02/08/2009

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OMG you are a woman after my own heart! I share your philosophy on child rearing, equiping them with the skills to be the best adults they will ultimately be! I to have a relaxed household with boundaries. I like to think the boundaries I lay down are like a loving pair of arms hugging and keeping my children safe, after all children thrive within boundaries. Child rearing is as difficult or easy as we make it and if you LIKE your child it is even easier! I know we love our kids but to like them is really helpful! I also believe that our kids are a true reflection of how they are parented and their home environment. So if you ever see a trait in your child you don't like, take a look at your own behaviour after all they are learning it somewhere! (just a general observation) lol It is so exciting to meet someone that gets what parenting is about! So many on here seem to find difficulty in the simplest things in child rearing! I can guarantee you that you will have wonderful daughter with amazing empathy when she grows older as you are nurturing her with the best intention, I know as I have a 19 year old daughter who still lives at home and she has a beautiful nature! Happy parenting X

[deleted account]

Quoting Estelle:



Quoting Rebecca:

My daughter is 2 and Ive had a potty in my sitting room since she was 1 years old just so she saw it around the place. However it then became the only place she wanted to sit. Then she saw something on telly whilst I was doing the dinner and I walked back in to see her sat there on her potty having a wee!!!! I didnt discourage or incourage I just left her to do whatever she wanted. In fits and starts she would use it but I never left her without nappies.

So now she has just turned 2 and she decided 2 days before her birthday (5th feb) that she was going to go to the potty as she wanted knickers like mummy.. (lol.) So off we went to the shops where she begged me for some 'in the night garden' knickers and now shes using the potty. I never incouraged or discouraged it. I just left her to it however when she does do a number 1 or 2 on the potty she gets tonnes of praise.

So its been nearly a week that she has been nappy less during the day, however If Im going out I still put a nappy on her and obviously at bedtime I put a nappy on her. If she carries on using ising the potty, great but if not, its no big deal. Im sure she will go back to it again when she feels ready.






CONGRATULATIONS to you and your daughter! Your daugher with a few subtle hints (potty in sight) from you has decided on her own accord to use the potty. No training involved. It can be such an easy process with the cooperation and choice of the child! I think training is for puppies. Loving support, praise and encouragement to a willing child is so much better for all and ssssoooooo much less stressful! Good on you and your conciderate parenting skills. Again I congratulate you. Happy parenting! X





Aww, thank you hunny. That means alot. I never really saw it as conciderate but I suppose it is. lol.  I just try to encourage my daughter to make her own desisions even from silly things like which plate she wants to have her dinner on to what clothes she wants to wear that day.



I dont look at her as a baby or toddler but more like a little adult and I think that is the way it should be as one day us parents are not going to be around and they will need the skills to cope. I like to think I run a very relaxed family unit and that the boundries are firm but fair.



I think its all a matter of respect your child and they will respect you. Make them feel heard and the opinions listened to and praise the good ignore the bad, and your well away. Thats what I have done since she was born and its paid off for me.

Estelle - posted on 02/08/2009

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Quoting Rebecca:

My daughter is 2 and Ive had a potty in my sitting room since she was 1 years old just so she saw it around the place. However it then became the only place she wanted to sit. Then she saw something on telly whilst I was doing the dinner and I walked back in to see her sat there on her potty having a wee!!!! I didnt discourage or incourage I just left her to do whatever she wanted. In fits and starts she would use it but I never left her without nappies.

So now she has just turned 2 and she decided 2 days before her birthday (5th feb) that she was going to go to the potty as she wanted knickers like mummy.. (lol.) So off we went to the shops where she begged me for some 'in the night garden' knickers and now shes using the potty. I never incouraged or discouraged it. I just left her to it however when she does do a number 1 or 2 on the potty she gets tonnes of praise.

So its been nearly a week that she has been nappy less during the day, however If Im going out I still put a nappy on her and obviously at bedtime I put a nappy on her. If she carries on using ising the potty, great but if not, its no big deal. Im sure she will go back to it again when she feels ready.



CONGRATULATIONS to you and your daughter! Your daugher with a few subtle hints (potty in sight) from you has decided on her own accord to use the potty. No training involved. It can be such an easy process with the cooperation and choice of the child! I think training is for puppies. Loving support, praise and encouragement to a willing child is so much better for all and ssssoooooo much less stressful! Good on you and your conciderate parenting skills. Again I congratulate you. Happy parenting! X

[deleted account]

My daughter is 2 and Ive had a potty in my sitting room since she was 1 years old just so she saw it around the place. However it then became the only place she wanted to sit. Then she saw something on telly whilst I was doing the dinner and I walked back in to see her sat there on her potty having a wee!!!! I didnt discourage or incourage I just left her to do whatever she wanted. In fits and starts she would use it but I never left her without nappies.



So now she has just turned 2 and she decided 2 days before her birthday (5th feb) that she was going to go to the potty as she wanted knickers like mummy.. (lol.) So off we went to the shops where she begged me for some 'in the night garden' knickers and now shes using the potty. I never incouraged or discouraged it. I just left her to it however when she does do a number 1 or 2 on the potty she gets tonnes of praise.



So its been nearly a week that she has been nappy less during the day, however If Im going out I still put a nappy on her and obviously at bedtime I put a nappy on her. If she carries on using ising the potty, great but if not, its no big deal. Im sure she will go back to it again when she feels ready.

Michelle - posted on 02/06/2009

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I agree with that Estelle.  My aunt tried to push my cousin to potty train, and it nearly caused WWIII.  He purposefully went number 2 in his pants until he was almost 5. I let my son do it in his timing, at around 3 years old, and it worked great!

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