14 month old is a little brut!

Hathaichanok - posted on 04/24/2010

He looks for your reaction after he've done that. At this age, they will think they can control anything.

If my baby hits me, I would ask her "why she did that" then I would tell her gently that's not the good thing to do. If she hits again, I'll walk away.

Bethany - posted on 04/24/2010

Kids need some things repeated SO many times before it starts becoming natural for them.



I agree, that it's instinct as we've never hit Charlotte, and she's never seen anyone be hit. (She's also getting all her molars (at once I'm sure!) and is hitting her self on the head and banging her head on things alot more than ever before.)



Keep doing what you're doing, I do the same thing. Saying "be gentle with Mummy" then holding her hand and stroking where she hit. I think this is a really frustrating time for kids, as they're comprehending so well and want to do so much but their little bodies don't let them do it well yet.



As long as you are modelling the behaviour you want from him, he'll eventually cotton on. I can say to Charlotte now "I do not hit you, you do not hit Mummy" "I do not kick you, you do not kick Mummy"



She used to kick at me when on the change table and I would put her feet to the mat and say UH UH No Kick very gruffly, looking her in the eye and she would do it again and I would do it again etc. Then the other day, she suddenly got it. Now, when being changed, she holds her little index finger up and says NO NO NO and gently pedals her legs, but doesn't kick. Like she's showing me she knows not to kick. And I say "very good! We do not kick, good girl!" and I kiss her feet "thankyou!" and she says Ang goo (thankyou)



So, just soldier on. Know you are doing a good thing, and that he'll eventually settle into his version of what he sees others do.

Erin - posted on 04/14/2010

My daughter is rough and wild too, and has a fierce little temper. She also has never been smacked, or seen anyone else be smacked so I really think it is just instinct for them to lash out like that when they're frustrated. She's also a much bigger child (9lb 6oz born and now over 26lbs and wearing size 2s) so it is a concern to me when she is rough with other babies. She's not in daycare but does have regular contact with several other babies her age.

The hitting really became an issue when she was teething hard while getting her molars.When it happened I simply said 'no' and put her down and ignored her for a minute or two - kind of like a mini-version of time out I guess. She was a very early talker and her vocab is extensive, so when I can see her getting agitated or it looks like a tantrum is on the way I ask her what's wrong, or what she wants, and tell her to use her words. Often she can tell me, sometimes she can't. But I am consistent in my reaction if she hits. Every time she gets put down on the floor and I walk away. Sometimes she gets over it straight away because she realises she doesn't have my attention and I'm not going to react. Other times there's a full-blown tantrum, in which case I just let her go until she calms down. Once she has, we just resume playing or talking as if nothing has happened. Attention is a baby's biggest currency. If you remove that they will realise you don't like their behaviour and it will not get them what they want.

Jessica - posted on 04/14/2010

just let him know that he is hurting you and if he doesnt understan keep trying if still nothing maybe a time out or take his penguin away and get him to understand that hurting other people hurts his penguin and thats why the penguin is in time away kids usually understand if u use a friend ;)

Tonya - posted on 04/14/2010

My guy is much bigger too! Everyone thinks he is 2 and he even wears some 2T clothing. He is just so tall and more active than the others his age we know. I think he can do so much that it frustrates him to be stopped and that he cannot communicate. He is getting better with dis and dat to let us know what he wants. I don't think it is uncommon to be aggressive sometimes but it is hard to deal with.

Karmen - posted on 04/13/2010

Thanks Tonya. I think it may come from his size in a way as everyone kind of expects him to be that way as he is so much bigger than other 14 month olds. We are a time out and take away household, no smacking allowed.

Tonya - posted on 04/13/2010

My son plays rough as well. I have a huge bruise on my cheek to prove it. I just always tell him that it hurts me and I don't like it. I think some kids just play that way. My son hasn't been around any hitting either since it is just my husband and I. He doesn't do day care either and has only been pushed a few times at the playground. I'm wondering if they like the cause and effect?? When he gets older (18 monthsish), I'd start doing time out. Also, be sure that hitting isn't a form of punishment or I hear it will continue.

GOOD LUCK!