If You Have A Boy? Did U Have To Get Him Circumsized?
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Bri - posted on 04/08/2011
i don't believe in circumcision. my husband & i both agreed that if we have a boy, he won't be circumsized. i think it's useless, & it's cruel. God made boys the way they are when they are born, & i don't believe in messing with what God created. as for it being unclean, no.. your baby will be just as clean as long as you know how to clean them. my husband is uncircumsized & has never had anything happen to him because of it. for the ones that say babies get infections or are dirty, they're only that way because their parents don't know how to properly clean them. if you don't want them to be circumsized, noone can make you!
Karen - posted on 02/26/2011
ok seriously I just have to say this to pp. It is NOT that hard to clean it. My son's gets wiped like I would his arm or leg. A grown man just has to pull back and wipe, seriously NOT difficult. Sorry you had a bad experience, but those men obviously had no idea what they were doing or were just plain dirty sorry to say. I'm not going to say anymore cause I don't wanna get rude and this is not what the op needs right now, but that whole post is just rediculous.
Karen - posted on 02/19/2011
My son is not circumsized. It it not my penis so not my choice. It didn't matter to me if he looked like his daddy since a simple explanation would do, just think you would explain why daddy's is a heck of a lot bigger so not a big deal right? Cutting off his foreskin would also remove some sensitivity so uhum down the road he might apreciate that ;). The locker room one doesn't really matter anymore since almost half the babies being born now are not having their foreskins removed, so then all they will have to be shy about is their size lol.
If it was something that was medically necessary then of course I would consider it but not until after researching all other options and getting a few different doctor's opinions. Some doctors might be able to help without cutting his penis, some are knife happy. I would find the ones that would rather save his foreskin if at all possible. In the end if it has to be done, then at least you weighed all your options and made a fully informed decision.
Daniela - posted on 02/09/2011
This is very cultural issue. I am from Erope and nobody is circumsized there. It is really completly reversed, the ones circumsized are the exception. Circumsicion is done due to cultural or religious custum. For us it seems very barbaric and completly unnecesarry , mutilation really. Nobody is gonna win the argument here, to me it is about what is consider normal in any particular culture. I read recently that it used to be an absolute norm in US to be circumsized, however now about 25% boys is not, largely due to people from other cultures having different tradition. The hygine is not such a big deal. I wonder if cicrumsized man lose some sensitivity, in the end pennis was created with the foreskin not without it.
Jenn - posted on 11/11/2011
No my son was never circumsized, nor is my hubby. Doctors actually tell you not to pull the foreskin back to clean, it is self cleaning. I do not see the need to lop off a part of my childs body when it poses no health risk. To do it because you prefer the look of a circumsized penis or because you find it gross seems pretty selfish to me. The foreskin is there for a reason, to protect the very sensitive head of the penis. It is not really all that common well at least with people i know, i am in New Brunswick Canada. I guess at the end of the day it is a personal choice, although your not the one that has to live with the decision.
Melony - posted on 12/09/2011
My son is not circumsized. People who sit there and say that an uncircumsized penis is gross or weird are the reason kids who are not circumcized get self concious in the first place. My first LTR was with an uncircumsized man and i saw nothing wrong with it, nothing weird or gross about it at all. and now i'm married to a man who IS circumsized, and again, no different.
Even though his daddy is, we decided not to get unnecessary surgery on our sons penis. It was a concious decision made with months or research. We were never pressured by our pediatrician, only family. I figure why disfigure something that is SUPPOSED to be there in the first place right?
All of my family is circumsized and found it weird that we weren't doing it to our son, but in the end it was our decision. I've also heard many horror stories about men who get it done later in life and complain about decreased sensitivity and it just feeling strange afterwards. They regret doing it. Also many stories about accidentally deforming an infants penis because of a mis cut, excessive bleeding, infection, etc...
I understand that everyone has their own opinions on this topic, and I do not judge anybody based on their decision becasue in teh end it is your own personal choice. But i do not like the fact that some people in here are saying that not being circumsized is weird, gross, unclenly etc. They were obviously not informed about the process properly and are very closed minded to the whole thing. Cleaning it is no different than a regular penis, they are self cleaning until the foreskin pulls back. My son has never had an issue, not once. This is why they no longer deem it medically necessary in North America. There is no legitimate proof that is is any healthier to be circumsized than not. Afterall, a majority of the world is NOT circumsized (something like 75%) Only in north america is it the norm to do so.
I spent a year in italy with my husband and not a single person we knew was circumsized. People make it out to be more of an issue than it really is.
Trust me, my son will be getting plenty of booty when he's older, and it will have nothing to do with his penis. Unless some girls are just as shallow as some of the people on here.
Krista - posted on 12/09/2011
Centain, let me address your points:
1. You do NOT physically pull back the foreskin. Ever. It will retract naturally on its own when it is ready. Leaving it alone and closed will actually PREVENT infection from entering. Pulling it back will tear the prepuce, inviting infection.
2. The cleanliness argument does not hold water (no pun intended). First of all, circumcision is extremely rare in Europe, in Latin America, and in the South Pacific. Their boys do not suffer rampant infections. Have you never wondered why that is? AND, let us not forget that a girl's labia is just as (if not more so) difficult to clean. And yet nobody is recommending having them sliced off.
3. With the elderly argument, you're basically arguing that we should have our infant sons put through surgery now, just in case some worker, 85 years from now, does not know how to do her job. Okay, then. And once again, you could apply your argument to women -- I'm sure that some of the women who are incontinent, wind up with feces in their vagina and labia. And yet, I don't see people recommending surgery for infant girls, in order to prevent that happening.
4. With regards to the sex life thing, you are only thinking about YOUR experience and preferences. Routine infant circumcision numbers are plummeting. So by the time your kid is old enough to have some girl (or boy) interested in giving him oral sex, the odds are extremely good that this individual will have already seen an uncircumcised penis, and will be quite used to them. And what if your son winds up with someone from Europe, who finds circumcised penises off-putting?
5. So all boys should have everything look like their dad's? What if Dad is missing a testicle, due to surgery? What if Dad has a genital piercing? Besides...unless there's something pretty odd going on, there is NO freaking way that a little boy's penis is going to look exactly like a grown man's one.
6. And your porn argument is HILARIOUS. Most women in porn have breast implants. So does that mean that this should be the standard to which we make our kids conform? Seriously? Come on.
Why not just leave it be, and when your son is old enough to have a sex life and worry about his care in an old-age-home, he can decide HIMSELF if he wants that to be done. Yes, he'll remember the pain. So what? At least an adult can take good painkillers, and at least he'll know WHY it was done. Doing this to a newborn infant, who has absolutely no idea what's going on, and only knows that he hurts (not to mention putting an infant through risky general anaesthetic, solely for looks???) -- to my mind, that's pretty cruel.
Tiffany - posted on 12/08/2011
Well I have five boys and they all are circumcised. My two oldest boys dad wasn't and I seen what he went through just to stay clean. He and I both said it was best. Yeah the procedure is scary but I never watched and I just did what I needed to keep it clean which is pack it with vasoline at every diaper change. Now that my boys are getting bigger I value my decision.
My son is circumsized, and I would advise any parent to definitely get their boys circusized.
There are many reasons why I feel strongly about this, and I will do my best to explain them.
If your son is not circumsized you will need to physically pull his fore-skin back for him when he has a bath, and you will need to constantly remind him to do it himself once he is old enough to do so himself.
If the foreskin is not kept clean there is risk of infection.
When boys become sexually active they are at a higher risk of contracting an STD if they are uncircumsized as the foreskin can hold bacteria if not cleaned regularly, and I know some people will say "thats no problem if you teach boys about cleanliness", but really, how many teenage boys really worry about their hygeine. Alot of young men wear the same undies days in a row!!
Another issue to think about, that most likely would never cross your mind unless you have worked with elderly men in aged care like I have, is what about when they are old, in-continent and rely on nursing staff for their personal needs? Do the nursing staff pull back the fore-skin for these men to clean out the faeces? No, alot of the time they dont do it properly, and you can imagine why.
Also, yes you should be concerned about his sex life in the future. Being a woman myself, I can say honestly I would be discouraged by an uncircumsized willy for the real close and personal acts like oral sex, so I would assume many other women would feel the same.
You should also think about the father and wether or not he is done, as it is always good for the son and father to be 'the same'. It also looks better i think, i mean if you look at porn, what percntage of the men are circumsized? over 90%..
I also waited till my son was 4 months old before getting him done, and I took him to a private hospital with a doctor I chose, and he was under a general anaesthetic, so he felt no pain, and I felt alot better about having it done this way.
Hope I've helped!!
Amanda - posted on 12/05/2011
I have a son and had him circumcised. During the healing process you have to keep an eye on it. The skin can begin to grow back down and then you have to pull it back or take him to his doctor and have them do it. It is painful when it is pulled back apart, but like his doctor said, "He is so young and will not remember". I agree! Do it while they are young if you are going to do it. It is more expensive once they are grown and a lot more painful. Both have their pros and cons. If you don't circumcise you will have to make sure you show him how to clean it. The skin will have to be pulled back to clean and when using the bathroom. Which could be a little tricky when potty training. Ultimately it is up to you.
Krista - posted on 12/02/2011
Yikes, Katherine! That doctor is lucky you didn't punch his lights out! You NEVER forcibly retract a foreskin.
Ignorant doctors like that are the reason WHY so many people claim that uncircumcised boys get a lot of infections -- because asshats like that doctor are manhandling them, tearing the foreskin, and CREATING infections.
Leave it the hell alone, and odds are very good that you'll never have a problem with it.
Katherine - posted on 11/26/2011
My son's pediatrician tried to scare me into getting Raven circumcised when he was about three months old and he got sick. The doctor needed to take a urine sample but his foreskin was still firmly tight on the end (like it's supposed to be for several years) so I watched in horror as he forced the foreskin to pull back and my son screamed bloody murder while they used a feeding tube to take urine directly from his bladder. It bled pretty freely for several minutes and the doctor told me "you might as well go ahead and get him circumcised now so this doesn't happen again down the road." I refused. My son has had no problems, no UTIs, not even diaper rash before that or ever since. So unless it's medically necessary or he decides otherwise when he's older, my son will not be circumcised now or ever.
Michelle - posted on 11/22/2011
My sons are both circumsized. They are in their 20s, but regardless, it is much healthier. My brother is 15 years younger than me and when he was born my Dad didnt have him circumsized. Well when he reached age 3 , he got a major infection, and the doctor said it was because he wasnt circumsized. Personally I think its gross if you dont.
Tamara - posted on 11/19/2011
I have two boys, one is, one isnt. No problem to not, as long as you keep it clean and teach your son to keep it clean. My ex insisted on having our boy done. And he had a little cap and band on. His fell off after about 4 days, and it did not smell or anything.
Katherine - posted on 11/19/2011
The majority of baby boys never need to be circumcised but some develop a disorder where their foreskin is closed up too tight to allow urine to come out, or sometimes the urethra exits at a different point than the glans. The first, called phimosis, results in a prompt need for circumcision, but this usually only happens when the foreskin is forced back before it's ready and it heals wrong.
As for me, I didn't get my son circumcised because I feel it is cruel and unusual punishment for being male. So far I have had no problems - no UTIs or anything - and I'm hoping he never will. I have asked some of my guy friends, and those who have been circumcised wish they hadn't been, and vice versa. I guess it's all a matter of opinion.
I hope your son turns out okay - be sure to get a second and third opinion before getting him circumcised because you can't change your mind if it turns out to be unnecessary.
Heather - posted on 11/19/2011
I had a son, whos dad isnt involved so it was entirely my decision. I had him circumsized. Though its controversial after doing the research on the pros and cons as well as the rates of infection and the increased rates of STDs in uncircumsized vs circumsized males (yes even in completly modern countries) I did what I felt was best. Yes certain states and countries are now refusing to do it. But we have to make decisions every day for our childrens health. If I would give my daughter a series of shots to prevent HPV I will definently have an unnecessary piece of skin removed to prevent infection.
Amanda - posted on 11/17/2011
I didnt have my litle boy done, I wouldnt cut any other part of his body off so this part was no different to me. In the city I live in, they wont even perform the procedure anymore, you have to go to an entirely different province now. In the end it totally ends up being the parents decision wether their child has the skin or not.. As parents we are supposed to make decisions in the best interest for our child.. not because daddy looks the same. If the doctor told me something was wrong, it would be in my sons best interest to have it done.. otherwise Im not making that decision for him. Hopefully your sons ok though and the lump turns out to be nothing! ♥
Trista - posted on 11/14/2011
Our sons are not circumcised. My husband is greek and they don't which im glad because honestly I don't feel comfortable making a decision whether or not to cut off anything off my child if they feel they need it done later in in life that's fine by me, i'll even pay for it. For those who do circumcise please don't think I'm attacking I know alot of people who chose to, but personally I'm glad we didn't
Wow some mothers are not very educated on circumsision... that being said, I hope everything is fine with your son and you are able to make the decision that you want to make.
The foreskin isn't supposed to be retracted (pulled back) until the child is between the ages of 2 and 3, unless it detaches sooner. After it is detached it is simple to clean. Pull the skin back and expose the head and either use soap or just use water and rinse it off. It's not rocket science. My boys are not circumsized. For one because they were born that way for a reason. And two, I figured we are in modern america and if anything did arise it could be treated. My advise for other mothers that are making this decision would be to research and not just go with what some mothers or family members think it the best idea. It is a personal choice and you have to do what you feel is right. Not what anybody else says. Whether you decide to circumsize or not.
Krista - posted on 10/28/2011
We didn't circumcise our son, and I have no intention of doing it unless it becomes medically necessary.
Putting a newborn through surgery to prevent a problem that may not ever even happen? Ridiculous. And as far as the cleanliness thing...really, it's a hell of a lot harder to clean all the folds and nooks of our vaginas and labia, right? And yet somehow, we manage to get by without rampant infections. And if we DO get infections, there's a lovely little invention out there called "antibiotics." So why amputate part of a boy's penis instead of just teaching them how to clean themselves properly?
Diamond - posted on 10/23/2011
I got my two and half year old son circumcised and it wasnt because of religious reasons or because his dad is circumcised too. Its for his health benefit and to prevent him from running into problems such as your son. Im sorry this is happening to your son but there is a reason why circumcision is performed. Good luck!
Carly - posted on 05/06/2011
a lot of times the lump is just skin cells that get trapped under the skin, they can usually get it out with a small incision, but you have to see the pedi. urologist to be sure. my friend's so just had that done (but he was circumcised at birth, so that didn't affect it)
Carly - posted on 05/06/2011
I have a boy and no we did not circumcise him for many reasons. Why were you told you might have to get him circumcised? Did they tell you he has adhesions?
See, we were alway told to leave his foreskin alone, just clean it regularly. Then at his 2 yr visit this a-hole Dr. who we never saw before told me to start retracting the foreskin to loosen it. Then Georgie started complaining "boo boo pee pee" and holding it all the time after I started trying to retract it. We went back to the doctor and they said he has adhesions and will need to be circumcised and go see a urologist. So we went and the urologist said that it is normal for the foreskin to still be attached to the penis, it's not an adhesion and we should not have been retracting it, that it will loosen on it own, usually when boys start potty training. He gave us a steriod cream to help it along since it was alreay irritated and voila! no more boo-boo pee pee. Man I was ticked off at that doctor.
Be sure to get a second opinion from a pediatric urologist if they told you something similar. I've heard a lot of horror stories about unnecessary circumcisions lately, seems the urologists need to school the pediatricians a little better about uncircumcised penises.
Lee - posted on 04/10/2011
I want to say is that my son may or may not be circumsized I don't know yet. I don't want this done but if he has to get it done bc of medical reason's so be it. I have heard I shouldn't get it done. I know I shouldn't but if it's medical reason's then I can not do anything about it. He has a small lump on his penis. N that is y we r going to see a Specialist this month. So I just wanted to clear this up. TY
Kayla - posted on 02/26/2011
we got our son done when he was 8 wks old, he only cried when they gave him the needle to numb him .. and then the doctor snipped of the skin and it was all over within 20 secs. My son didnt cry afterwards and it healed really nicely it didnt even bother him - it was the best choice weve ever made getting him done. its SOO much cleaner for them and hey it looks nicer too. Personally it makes me sick when i think men/boys arent snipped - i have a few male freinds (older) who suffer from so many problems down there, cleanliness, smell, dried up crustys stuck underneath - i highly highly recommend you get it done. if your son is older they usually knock them out and they spend 1/2 a day in hospital. A few hours in a hospital compared to a life time of having to worry bout cleaning your penis properly making sure it doesn't smell etc etc ... I know which option id choose if i were a male! Goodluck!
Jaimie - posted on 02/17/2011
My husband and I decided before our son was born to do have the procedure done. If your husband and you think it's best to wait then I say that's what you should do.
But if a doctor is telling you, that little man should have the procedure, then I think it's best to get a second opinion, if they say the same thing then I suppose you should listen. Doctors will only tell you the options, you have to decide. Good Luck and God Bless
Karina - posted on 02/13/2011
We decided to do it as a recommendation of our pediatrician when he was born. My son was asleep the whole time the doctor circumsized him and he didnt present any problems after. A friend told me that her son (16yrs old) asked her to do be circumsized because he plays sports and was always embarrassed and concern about other team players seeing him, but at the end every child/person is different.
Michelle - posted on 02/02/2011
I had my son circumcised when he was a day or two old. He had no problems what so ever afterwards. He didn't even seem uncomfortable or in pain. You can argue whether it needs to be done or not, but look at it this way: my sisters boyfriend and most of the male members of his family had to get it done as adults (which I've heard is a lot more painful as adults) for health reasons. So I would say doing it when he's little and it being much less painful (and when he'll never remember it) is worth it in the long run.
Laura - posted on 02/02/2011
We had it done in the hospital when he was two days old. I've heard the against nature argument and the not causing them pain argument but then I read stories like Khadijah's and I know I did right. Look at it this way..if you get it done now and it fixes a problem and prevents futer problems it will hurt less and heal faster then when he's 7, 17, or 27 and HAS TO have it done. It's sort of(I said sort of) like tonsils. The younger you get them out the less pain and faster healing. My mom had hers out as a kid and was back to school in a week. My sister had hers out at 42 and was out of work for a month and then got an infection that kept her out another week.
Khadijah - posted on 01/31/2011
I have to play devils advocate here. First let me say I do not have a son (I have twin girls). However, my ex was not circumsized and I also knew a friend whose roommate was not circumsized. My ex had the surgery when he was 21 years old. It was very painful for him and he would always say to me "I don't know why my Mom just didn't have it done when I was a baby!". At this time he was working full-time and had to take time off work to have the surgery done, not to mention the recovery time. If the wind blew he was in pain. My sister had her son circumcized and the healing time was speedy in comparison to the recovery time of an adult. I've heard that boys are much more suceptible to infection when they are not circumsized, not to mention "adult time" was not as pleasurable before the surgery. My friends roommate went through a much more harsh recovery and also stated the same thing about him wishing his Mom would have taken care of it a long time ago. It is a tough decision I know, but I recommend doing some asking around. Not just statistical facts but rather looking into some real life experiences. Best of luck on whatever you choose.
Karmi - posted on 01/27/2011
I have a boy and I did get him circumsized. As long as you properly know how to clean and uncircumsized child, I don't think there should be any reason to have it circumsized. I was more comfortable with my son being circumsized because that is just my view on it. But I'm not against not circumsizing a boy either. It is all up to you, no one will force you to do it or not do it,
Bridget - posted on 01/26/2011
I have 2 boys and both mine are but I did this when they were weeks out of the hospital. I was concerned about the pain issue and waiting for more than 3 weeks my doctor said the pain is the same as a new born or a 3 week old.
Neither of my boys had it done the same way, my oldest had a ring put on and that was very smelly and hard to clean my other son had no ring and had a gauze around it and we went back a couple days after to have the doc take it off and look at it and it was fine.
I felt that as my boys got older it would be easier for them to take care of since hygiene isn't always the first thing on a boys list of things to do let alone take the time to clean uncircumcised correctly.
Cristen - posted on 01/25/2011
Our son was circumsized and it is such a scary thing to me. I hate the idea of it, and I can't stand messing with it to clean it and everything after the procedure. It's all healed up now and looks fine, but I was on the phone with the doc nearly every day to report a new problem with it. In my mind, something looked weird, but it was just fine. If I hadn't circumsized my first son, I wouldn't have circumsized my second, but I didn't want them to grow up and be like, why are we different? I also have heard that an uncircumsized penis can be hard for kids to keep clean and can get infected. Of course, you can always show them the proper way to clean it. I think it's just a matter of personal choice. Unfortunatly, for the little guys, they don't get a say...and leaving it until they are old enough would be too painful if they wanted it done then (which I think most likely they would). There really is no need for it though besides conformity I think...kind of stinks.
Shelley - posted on 01/25/2011
we have one boy, and no we didn't.
don't see the need.
even though half our family is circumcised, we didn't want to make that choice for our son. It's up to him if he wants to do that later in life. We just felt that it was too cruel to do.
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