Is anyone else experiencing seperation anxiety with their child?

Shawna - posted on 04/24/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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When I put my son to bed, and sometimes even if I just leave the room, he freaks out and has a fit. Is anyone else experiencing this with their 14 month old? Any suggestions?

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KAREN - posted on 04/26/2010

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ALL THE TIME.CASEY JUST STARTED BEING IN HIS OWN ROOM AND HE SLEEPS GREAT,I'M THE ONE SNEEKING UP STAIRS TO CHECK ON HIM,AND MAKESURE HE'S STILL BREATHING.ALL MY FRIEND'S MAKE FUN OF ME,AND TELL ME THAT WILL CHANGE,BUT I MISS HIM EVEN WHEN I'M GONE FOR AN HOUR.IT'S CRAZY.

Jenny - posted on 04/26/2010

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My daughter cries when I leave the house. She's with her dad and he's great with her so I don't get it. Day care, she was crying for about a week or two when I left her but is now okay. It's very normal at this age.

Vickie-Jean - posted on 04/26/2010

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yes, it happens to most children at this age and it's perfectly normal. I can't even go upstairs to put my older daughter to bed without my 14-month-old getting upset. Happens when I use the restroom and sometimes even when I just walk around a corner like into the kitchen. I just try to speak to her before hand and even while I'm in the other room so she can perhaps hear my voice and understand that though she can't see me, I'm still there and that I WILL return. Just hang tough, this (like most phases) will pass before you now it!

Shanah Cheyenne - posted on 04/26/2010

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I talk to my son a lot, and even though he doesn't communicate in so many words yet, i know he understands a lot. i always reassure him, "mommy is not leaving you. i have to go potty but i will be right back ok?" if he cries then i let him but after hearing me say this a lot, he knows it will only be a minute before i return. if you get him used to that, then it wont be as bad when you are gone for longer periods of time. he will have that reassurance that you are going to return.

Jessica - posted on 04/25/2010

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My son had really bad seperation anxiety not so much when i put him to bed, but when i leave to go to the bathroom or take a shower or even just walk into another room he screams horribly he has just kinda grown out of it when he did freak out i just held him and told him im still here im not leaving him. My husband hasnt been around since he was 2 1/2 months old hes over seas so im the only one around so i just had to make sure he knew i wasnt just leaving him. and now he doenst freak out when i leave the room.

Dawn - posted on 04/24/2010

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Like Bethany said, this is a normal stage for this age range. My son has always been a bit clingy during different times of the day and if he is teething, which we are going through now. If I am in the bathroom or cooking dinner or just need a minute, he will be fine to cry! I have recently started going to the gym and will take him to the daycare 2x a week for about 1 hour. He did really well the first few times but started fussing the last couple times. The first time it happened I took him and skipped working out so we could go to the playground!! But I am not going to give this up, so the next time, I put him in the caregivers arms, said "Be back soon, Love you" and left. He calmed down quickly they said and had fun playing (but was still a bit fussy, damn teeth!!) I am glad for this opportunity for both of us; I feel him learning that I will not always be there but will return is important. That said, when he is super clingy at night because he isn't feeling good, I dole out plenty of cuddles (he doesn't always want them so I take them when I can get them!!!). Stay patient; respond when you think you should and stand your ground the other times!! :) :)

Jessi - posted on 04/24/2010

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my son does this all the time, i figured it was partially do to me being a sole parent (father isn't in the pic). he screamed for a 1/2 hour while i was getting ready for my friends baby shower today. i have him in daycare while i'm at work to socialize him with children his age but on my days off it's impossible for me to get anything done because he has to be right there.

Bethany - posted on 04/24/2010

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Apparently, this is a time when toddlers will often show signs of Separation Anxiety. That's ok, it's a stage they go through.



I find if I play peekaboo with Charlotte if I'm leaving the room and she is in a clingy mood, she accepts it a bit better, like it's a game. You can't do this all day though, you'd go mad, so if I need to go out to the clothes line and grab something, and she cries, she's just going to have to cry. Or if I need to go to the bathroom, she's just going to have to cry. And that's ok for a few minutes.



I hold Charlotte in our rocking chair until she's pretty much asleep, so not too much of a problem there, but sometimes she wakes when I put her down, so I just hold her some more and she's fine usually the second time. She just needs a bit more closeness at this time of her life, and that's what I'm here for. She's also getting all of her molars. I'm not going to wreck her by giving her more cuddles when she needs them, quite the opposite in fact.



It won't last long, and the more you comfort him now, the more confidence he'll have in you in the future. That's what I've gleaned from my research anyhow. Take it with a grain of salt.

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