staying overnight

Taylor - posted on 10/29/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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since my daughter was born 8 months ago i pretty much stopped going out. my friends avoid me like the plague, we are normally pretty tight on money, between staying home with her during the day and working at night im normally pretty tired, and to be honest, i'd rather just be at home with my baby. i havent gone out for fun/with friends since mid-april.

my boyfriend took it upon himself to buy us tickets to a huge halloween party/concert they do here every year. we normally go every year and he really wants to go again this year. and he really really wants me to go. he already made arrangements with his mom for her to watch our daughter overnight.

i really want to go, but i have never left my daughter with anyone for more than 5 or 6 hours. especially not overnight. on one hand, i think it would be nice to go out and have fun and be able to sleep in a bit sunday for once, but on the other hand... im afraid i'll just be worried about my daughter the whole time and maybe its not worth it. i think it is nice that he wants me to get out, but im kind of upset that he already told his mom she could watch our daughter overnight without even asking me if it was ok.

i dont know.. i think im really just freaking out about leaving her somewhere overnight. :(

am i being crazy?

should i get over it and go out?

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Tina - posted on 10/30/2010

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I say go for it. You gotta start doing it sometime and it isn't that bad. If you trust his mom you won't worry as much as you think you will, once you get out and have fun you don't think about them that much and when you do it is just to wonder what they are up to. I am a single mom of four now and would love to be able to leave my kiddos overnight to go out with a special someone. It is very important to make sure and still have you time and make time for him too since it is to easy when you have kids to forget to make couple time. Part of the reason my marriage ended is because i didn't make enough time for him, only part of course but still it did play into it.

Jess - posted on 10/30/2010

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love your idea celeste. i did the same thing with my daughter and my parents. because they live in another state she isnt to used to them so when my mum came over to stay for a week i let her do a few nights of looking after chelsie without me interfearing then on the last night mum was here i went out for the night. it was great, mum had no problems and chelsie was so excited to see me in the morning

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Celeste - posted on 10/31/2010

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Thats fantastic Jess, so glad it was also a success for you. I do think it helps if you can do it that way for the first time, as it really made me feel more confident. I never doubted my mum for a minute, it was just that I worried about my little gals reaction when someone 'new' popped their head into the nursery! Lol... Its tough being a mum sometimes... ;-)

Celeste - posted on 10/29/2010

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I have similar panic attacks about the same situation lol! Easier said than done when it comes to 'getting over it...' Mums worry, some more than others. Your LO is probably going to be perfectly fine, and be all smiles when she see's you the next day. What I would do in this situation (provided their is time before your party) is that I would arrange a night for your LO to stay over at your boyfriends mom's place, and you stay there too, but if at all possible, dont let your LO realise you are staying too. Let your boyfriends mum bath her, feed her and put her to bed. If she wakes, let her see to her as well. Then you can gage how your LO will react the next time she stays over, and you will feel much calmer too. Another option is to ask her to possibly stay over at your place so that your LO is in her own home, and you may feel more relaxed knowing that too? All will be fine, and you will all benefit from a change of scenery. Go and enjoy yourself! x

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