Losing my mind

Amber - posted on 08/31/2010

hey I can relate to that feeling. Sometimes I feel like my husband is jealous of me because i get to sit home and "relax" all day. It's hard for me to do, especially when I see him do my chores, and do them all wrong. I know he's trying so I'm keeping my mouth shut, but I hate, HATE, feeling this helpless. I know that when he goes grocery shopping, he will get all the wrong brands and not enough of this or that, I know this because in the 3 years we been together he's never gone grocery shopping alone, I'm the housewife, not him. Lol, I know that what brand he gets doesnt really matter, but I just want my power back.

Amanda - posted on 02/28/2010

i know it has to be horrible....i was there for a month...but my son was born at 26 weeks and had lotsof obstacles to over come and will be three this june but has a several issue still..you are at 31 weeks which is definetly a plus.... you can do this! you go girl!

Amanda - posted on 02/28/2010

hi,
i know it is hard ...but it is worth it... i was on bedrestamonth and my son came at 26 weeks.. i had a complete rupture of my water at 20 weeks due to a surgery .. i had fifth disease and my son had severe anemia becuase of it and had to have a blood transfusion in the womb and it cause too much stree and my water ruptured.... thank god that you have people to help you everyday... i was over 180 miles from home ...all by myself in a hospital room ay in day out only seeing my hubsand and kids maybe on the weekend..... for a few hours. at the time my oldest son was 3 and daughter was 6 months.... i prety much missed all of her first ......you are such a good mommy i am sure and you have done so muchfor your daughter already that now you have to do for the other one a little earlier then normal...but speaking from experience bedrest suck but you do not want a micro preemie..it is very hard ...i wil def be praing for you!

Casey - posted on 04/01/2009

I just got on bed rest today for leaking fluid.  I am very stressed and sad.. I hope I don't lose my mind I'll basicaly have to live at the hospital for the next two months. :(  I'm 31 weeks..

Selena - posted on 03/23/2009

By the way.... i am 38w2d today.

Selena - posted on 03/23/2009

How have you been? Sorry I haven't written back in awhile. I did not realize you typed back right away!

Are they still planning on admitting you on Tuesday? How are you feeling? Anything new going on?

I had a doc appt on Friday and I was 4-5 cm and 80% effaced. I have another appt Friday. Not sure if they will plan an induction or just let me go into labor. I am hoping I have the baby this weekend and if not I hope they will induce early next week. I am having some horrible leg pains and my back pretty much gave out last night  :( I was in so much pain.

I put the crib up yesterday and we went to a furniture store and ordered a bunk bed for our soon-to-be 4 and 2 yr old. My husband took out some baby clothes and will wash and bring them to the hospital once the baby is born.

I have been doing so much to keep this baby in that going into labor and giving birth is scaring the crap out of me.

Rachel - posted on 03/18/2009

I know what you mean. I have been using you as inspiration. To know that someone else has made it means that I have a chance. That my son, too, has a chance of survival. 24 weeks is only 2 days away, but it seems like an eternity.

How far along are you now? Are they just letting you go until you go into labor?

Selena - posted on 03/18/2009

I am just so sorry :( I am sorry this is happening to you and your baby. I just really hope that all turns out great in the end. It will be a hard road, but when you look back you'll realize how short it really was. I am still pretty shocked that it has been almost 15 weeks since I started having preterm labor issues. And almost 10 weeks that I have been dilated 4-5 cm, 50 % effaced. 10 weeks!! Its amazing what are bodies are capable of. Don't ever lose hope and say your prayers :)

Rachel - posted on 03/17/2009

Yep... I have 6 more days to enjoy the comfort of my own home. They took 4 tubes of blood today to run some tests. I just, about 3 days ago, started feeling really exhausted all of the time. I have not even been able to make it through an entire shower without having to take a seat for a minute. Mentally and emotionally I feel like I am drowning. I am starting to make a list of things to pack, but I just don't know what to expect. What I will and will not be allowed to do.



I expect that I will be in the hospital for 4 weeks as well. Our first goal is to get me to make it to 24 weeks. If I can do that then they are going to admit me. Our goal after that is about 28 weeks. The survival rate at 28 weeks is a strong 90%. He said that we are going to push it as long as we can, but that's a good start.



I'll be honest... I am terrified. I don't know what to think or how to feel.



I am very fortunate because my DH works closer to the hospital than to home, so he said that he will spend a few nights with me. I also live in the same house as my best friend and I am sure I can get a few nights of company out of him too.



I do have a laptop. The best investment I have ever made. Lol. I got The Sims a while back, so I am putting that on my laptop before I leave. I am also a picture taking madwoman, and I store all of my pics on my laptop, so I have plenty of those. I told the guys that they need to take lots of pictures of everyone for me while I am gone.



I can understand your fears. You have been through so much already. Just think... they have kept such a close eye on you that they will know the minute something, if anything at all, goes wrong. It sounds to me like you are in great hands though and you are going to be just fine.



Prayer is good. Prayer keeps you optomistic. The more optomistic you are the better you and the baby will do. I will definately keep you posted.

Selena - posted on 03/17/2009

Ugh! That is not the greatest news at all :( I am so sorry.

Good thing is that the doc isn't going to play around. Hospital bedrest is hard, but if it is whats best for baby then that doesn't leave many options. So this is 6 days from now? It gives you a little time to prepare, but mentally, I know, its breaking your heart. Pack a bunch of things that will help keep you busy. Be sure to bring some pics too.

I was in the hospital for 4 weeks and some days were better then others. Some days I did nothing and others I tried to stay busy. Can your hubby spend the night once in awhile? That will give you something to look forward to. My DH slept there one time with me, but I greatly appreciated it.

Do you have a laptop? That helped me a bit.  

I am doing ok. Still hanging in there. Now my fears are kicking in that something is going to go wrong :( I read way too much this pregnancy and all the bad things are sticking in my head. I just keep praying.

I will keep you in my prayers. Please keep me updated!!!

Rachel - posted on 03/17/2009

Went to the doctor today. It's not the good news that I hoped for. He said that if I make it to 24 weeks that they are going to admit me to the hospital to live there for a little while. He wanted me to go back and see him on Monday, but I can't get back there until Tuesday. The plan is that Tuesday I am going back in to see him and then he is going to send me to check in to the hospital from there. He said that when I get there they are going to want to hook me up to an IV right away and then do some bloodwork to see how my body is handling things. If I am ok then they want to start me on steroids and see how long they can keep the baby in for. Our goal for now is 28 weeks. If everything looks good at 28 weeks then they will push for longer, but for now I am in the no sneezing zone for 4.5 more weeks. He seems to have some concerns about the baby's heart, but I don't think he wants to address them until the baby shows that he can survive past 24 weeks.

I hope all is well with you.

Rachel - posted on 03/14/2009

I am sorry to hear about your twins. When we got to the hospital and the doctor saw that we were only at 23 weeks she pretty flat out told us that they would do nothing to help him. I was just so scared because I wasn't sure how things were going to go and if I did go into labor I just felt like they weren't even going to give him a chance.



They were saying that at 24 weeks they will put him in the NICU, but that still only leaves a 50% chance of survival. I am really hoping that staying completely in bed gives us much more time.



They said that they can't give me anything for the contractions because technically my water is already broken. Going into labor can be a sign of infection in my uterus and if they mask that symptom then the infection can cause bigger problems. Basically there is really nothing I can do but lay in bed, drink a lot of water, and wait.



Stress is a big problem for me. I am a huge control freak. Normal people are given a due date and that's when the baby comes. No having to be on bedrest. No in and out of doctor's offices and hospitals. Just going about normal life and then the due date comes and there the baby is. With a life like that there is that option to be in control of everything in your life. Things have just been so unpredictable with this pregnancy. We had plans to move into a bigger house in June and then the baby would be born in July. Now I just have to live day by day because I am not sure what is going to happen next. I feel like I have lost control of everything.



I watch A LOT of TV and play on the computer. The day just seems to go by so slow. Before I had housecleaning and my daughter to keep my day busy. I don't look at clocks anymore. I judge the time of day, and how close it is to my husband coming home from work, by what TV show is on. The only time I look at a calender is to see how close I am to my due date.



It's hard for me to see that my daughter needs something and have to call my husband in the room instead of getting up and getting it myself. It's also hard for me to watch her put her arms up on my bed because she wants me to hold her and I can't. I did put a stool on the side of my bed so whenever she wants to get up on my bed she can. I usually turn on cartoons so she will sit and cuddle with me for a while.



Thank you so much for your prayers. I will definately keep you in the loop.

Selena - posted on 03/14/2009

Oh man :( That was a horrible experience for you. I lost my twins at 22w4d and the docs did absolutely nothing to help them. 24 weeks is a good place, but totally understand that its 'only 24 weeks'. Did they give you any meds for the contrax? I was on the procardia and progesterone injections. I know everyone is different with the meds working and not working, but if you're contracting then they should try something.

And bedrest sucks and dealing with your MIL will be hard, but its so worth it. Try to keep your stress levels to a minimum too. It'll only make the days go slower :( I caught up on tv shows and read some books. Not sure if you have any hobbies but now is the time to start :) Your daughter can come to you for stories and playtime. I watched cartoons all day so my kids would sit with me. Its so pathetic, but whatever worked.

I will be praying for you!!! If you need to talk or vent, I'm here!!

Rachel - posted on 03/14/2009

I am so happy to hear that you hit your mark! Yeah! I know I can't wait for 37 weeks.



I, unfortunately, had a bit of a bad experience the night before last. My husband and friend went to the gym, so I got up out of bed and was sitting on my daughter's bed playing with her toys to try to spend some time with her. Next thing I knew I was having a hard time breathing and I got a huge cramp in my lower belly and around to my back. I got up to use the restroom, thinking it was just my lunch disagreeing with me, but it only got worse. I couldn't get up to get my phone, but the guys had just walked in the house shortly after it all started, so I knew that they would find me soon enough. My husband came down the hall looking for me and heard me in the bathroom crying, so he came in and asked me what was wrong. I was in so much pain all that I could manage to get out was "it hurts". He grabbed my phone and called the OB and I was able to gather enough strength to get up and lay down on my bed. The OB told my husband to get me to labor and delivery, so the guys picked me up and carried me to the car. We hit really bad traffic, so it took a little longer to get to the hospital that usual, and by the time we got there the cramps were not nearly as bad. They got me in the room to see what was going on and the baby's heartbeat was still going strong. They did a cervical exam and it was still closed. They also did an U/S and they could only find about 3cm of fluid left. They decided to keep me overnight for observation, so they put me in a room. It was then that they saw that I was having contractions. That's when I started to get REALLY worried. The doctor said that they were 2-3 minutes apart. She told me that things could go one of two ways: 1- It means that my uterus has an infection and I will go into labor. If that was the case then because I was only at 23 weeks they would deliver they baby, but there was nothing more they could do beyond that because nothing is developed enough yet for the baby to survive on his own. 2- The contractions would stop and I could go home to try to keep the baby in for a little longer. Fortunately the contractions got slower and then stopped all together. They sent me home and told me that I had to be serious about staying on bedrest.

In the very beginning of all of this my MIL offered to come watch my daughter during the day while my husband was at work, but I stubbornly refused. After realizing that I was being given a second chance I called my husband and told him that I was now ok with him calling his mother. Starting Monday she will be here taking care of her.

I thought I was being really careful last night. I, unfortunately, woke up to find that I was losing a large amount of fluid again. I had to get up twice last night. The first time I lost a lot of fluid, but the second it was not as bad. I also noticed that I started having contractions again. When I was in the hospital the doctor told me that if they were the type of contractions that were going to put me into labor they would hurt, but mine didn't hurt when I was in the hospital or when I was at home last night. I didn't call the doctor last night because there was no pain and I figured that the reason for all of the fluid loss was because they had to hooked up to an IV the whole time I was at the hospital. Since there is nothing that they can do anyways I figured I may as well stay at home and be in a more comfortable place. I just layed here and prayed that the contractions didn't start hurting and they didn't.



I have another appointment on Tuesday and I hit 24 weeks on Friday. I am definately seriously staying in bed and drinking LOTS of water. I am afraid to sneeze or cough. I am a little stressed because even at 24 weeks it's still ONLY 24 weeks. I am just keeping my fingers and legs crossed.

Selena - posted on 03/14/2009

Good morning. I am 37 weeks today! I am so happy that I have gotten this far. I would have never believed it if someone would have told me this 15 weeks ago. The baby is still high up, I am assuming once the baby drops it won't take long. My cervix is pretty dilated and soft.  But to make it to 37 weeks.....I am just praying and hoping the baby comes when s/he is finished cooking :)

That is wonderful that your husband will be home during the summer!! It will help with the adjustment of the new baby. My husband will be taking off a few days and then its me and all 5 of them~lol

I am sorry that you stepped in poop!!! Yuck. Its so hard when we can't control our home and being in this situation is one of the most trying. You will get through this just fine and it will all be a faded memory :)

So have you been doing nothing lately? I hope so :) The less the better for baby. When is your next appt?

Rachel - posted on 03/12/2009

I am so glad to hear that everything went so well today. 6lbs. 5oz. is not bad at all. My daughter was born at 6lbs. 7oz. I wouldnt' worry about your mom being mad at you. You are the one carrying the baby, and you have a connection with the baby, so you know what you need to do.



I am happy to hear about your cervix too. Sounds like you are going to make it at least the 9 days you wanted.



My daughter is spoiled and used to getting all of everyone's attention all the time, so I think we are definately going to feel that period of adjustment. My husband is a teacher, and the baby is due during the summer, so we will be home for the first few weeks that the baby is born. I am hoping that will make things a little easier on everyone.



I was really disappointed when I heard what number we were at. I really thought I would be going so much better by now. I thought I might be able to go back to work before having the baby, but now I really don't think that is an option. It was a combo of a couple of things. The hole from the amnio probably would have healed just fine had I not gotten sick and had to cough every 5 minutes. They told me that the chance of something going wrong was like 1 in 300, but I just didn't think it could happen to me. I was so worried about the prospect of a genetic abnormality and I didn't think it was something that they could do right there in office. I assumed that I was going to have to go to the hospital or something. It all happened so fast.



I know what you mean about the exhaustion. I went out to lunch today and I feel like I ran a marathon.



Emotionally I am a mess. I just fell apart yesterday when I walked around my bed to get something and stepped in something wet and mushy. I looked down and realized that my daughter pooped on my shoe. I have no idea why. She just did. I think she might be mad at me because I can't get up and play with her like I used to. It was after that that I realized that my house was a mess. When all of this started my husband said that he would do the important things that I couldn't do anymore. Unfortunately, he had not exactly been keeping up his end of the deal. I had been trying to let things go because getting stressed out is not good for the baby, but things had gotten kinda ridiculous. Needless to say my house is a lot cleaner now. On the downside, I it sent me back a little in my healing because I got so worked up about it.



How on earth am I going to handle a few more months of this?

Selena - posted on 03/12/2009

Still hanging in there. I had a doc appt and ultrasound this morning. Everything looks good. Babys heartrate was 167 and s/he weighed in at 6 lbs 5 oz, so we'll see:) Doc offered to strip my membranes, but I declined. My mom was irritated with me, but oh well~lol

My cervix has stayed the same even though I have been having some sort of contractions. I just this baby stays in for awhile longer.

My stepson was always used to getting his way. He was a spoiled brat. And went into some kind of shock after we had our son. Stepson was 4 yrs old at the time, but adapted well. I can not remember but I am sure it took a bit of time.

I am so sorry that your numbers are not going back up yet. Is there anything that you can do, besides bedrest? When you initially lost fluid was it b/c of the amnio? I just think docs are stupid for not explaining 'everything' from the ver beginning. A baby's life is not something that should be taken for granted.

After losing my twins....my #1 was my pregnancies...doc did not mess around. She told me to lay on my butt and I did. No messing around. I don't think some docs realize the importance of bedrest or certain meds until the patient is in the danger zone and that is just wrong, in my opinion.

I am exhausted today. Way too much for this body of mine. I am so outta shape :)

How are you?

Rachel - posted on 03/11/2009

I was starting to get worried about you! Lol. I was praying that you had not had the baby yet. Sounds like you are still doing a good job at holding the baby in though. =)



I just know my daughter is going to pass me up in no time. I am going to be the shorty in the house. Lol.v



It's good to hear that younger kids adapt easier. My daughter is just so spoiled and I am so worried about how she is going to react to having to share us. We will see.



I went back to the doctor yesterday. It appears that I am not doing as well on amniotic fluid as I thought. They kind of put it in perspective for me and now I wish I had never gotten out of bed at all last week. The doctor said that they use a numeric system to judge the amount of fluid in the sac. The ideal number for where I should be at right now is 18 and I am at a 6. Even worse is the danger zone is 4. I really thought I was doing better than that. He also told me that he thinks I damaged the placenta when I had the initial fluid loss and the placenta may not be strong enough to carry the baby to term. He didn't give me any estimated time that I have left or anything. I think, at this point, the placenta is fine and they are just going to keep an eye on it and let me know when they get concerned.



So back on stricter bedrest I go.



How are you feeling today?

Selena - posted on 03/10/2009

Oh yeah. You are a little thing :) I wonder how tall your daughter will end up being?

My 2 oldest share a room (10 and 6). My 3 yr old and 1 yr old will share as soon as the baby arrives. The baby will be with us in our room. Younger kids usually adapt well. It is much harder when they are older. My stepson was 4 when I had Charlie and he had a hard time. He still sorta does. He had commented how he wished he had an older sibling. I truly believe some kids should be only children and he is one of them. He just is a loaner, I guess :)

Not sure about the kicking and screaming. Maybe she will grow out of it by then?

Rachel - posted on 03/09/2009

I know what you mean about spending time in the shower. That seems to be the only time I can breathe lately. I don't know if it's allergys or what. Yes, no sneezing for you! I know how you feel about being afraid to sneeze. I actually get really mad when I do it. I lose fluid when I do and my goal is to keep as much of it in as possible.



I have been tiny my whole life. I usually stay around 105, pre preg., but I am also only 5"1'. I am a shorty. It's funny when you see my husband and I walking down the street because he is 6"3'. People see my daughter, who is already half my height, and they ask me all the time if she's mine. I just laugh and tell them how tall her dad is. I am expecting her to pass me up any day now. Lol.



I am really afraid about how my daughter is going to react when I have to go to the hospital and when we bring the baby home too. I don't think I have ever been away from her for more than 1 night at a time. She is so young that I am afraid she is going to feel abandoned and "traded in" if we are gone for days and then all of a sudden come home with a new baby. Of course she will be at the hospital with us for a short time during the day to visit, but I am still so worried.



I do have an off the wall question for you. Do any of your kids share a room? I am a little concerned with the situation that will be coming up soon. Our kids will be sharing a bedroom when our son is old enough to sleep in the crib. Our daughter will be 2. As it is right now she sits by the door and cries and kicks the walls until she falls asleep. How do we time things so that she doesn't keep our son up or so that he doesn't wake her up or god knows what else can go wrong?

Selena - posted on 03/06/2009

I feel a bit better today. I was up at 2:30 am running the shower for steam, applied vicks and took tylenol. ugh! I was completely drained this morning, but feel a bit better now. I am sneezing too!lol It makes me nervous :)

I usually gain 30-40lbs. This pregnancy I'm at barely at 20. This is completely new to me ~lol Not sure if its because I am being cautious b/c of the diabetes or what??

You are tiny! My average pre-pg weight is about 130-135. I was almost 170 with my last pregnancy. I was HUGE!

I'm sorry you had such a difficult childhood dealing with that type of abuse. I can't imagine. My mom makes it very clear that she does not think its healthy to be over weight. She weighed 102 forever and gained 12 and 14 lbs when pg. But your situation definitely sounds different:(

My kids are crazy! lol My stepson is 10, my son is 6, daughter is 3 1/2 and another son is 22 mos. They have been through so much  and are so excited about the new baby. I am a bit worried about my daughter. She thinks she can stay at the hospital with me when I go to have the baby. Shes going tp have a crappy few days when Im not here. Thank God everything is temporary.

Rachel - posted on 03/06/2009

It's amazing how much being sick really takes out of you. I think you should only be allowed to have one ailment at a time. We should not be allowed to have pregnancy problems AND be sick on top of that. It should be against the rules. Lol.

I know what you mean about feeling like mush. I was not prepared to gain this much weight this early. With my last pregnancy I gained most of my weight at the end, so I am really nervous about how much I will have gained after all of this is over. Unfortunately, that is something that is weighing on me (no pun intended) emotionally as well. I spent my childhood raised by a woman who was a bit on the mentally and emotionally abusive side. I remember being on medication and a side effect was weight gain and one time when I told her that I weighed 110lbs. she felt the need to tell me that when she left the hospital, after she had me, she only weighed 98lbs. It was a constant thing with her, so I have always tried to stay on the tiny side. Both times I have been pregnant I have gone into panic mode after I crossed that 110 mark and last pregnancy I really panicked when I thought I was going to hit 130. I am currently seeing a therapist, on top of all of the other doctors for the pregnancy lol, to try to work out that and some other issues as well. I think things are just harder to deal with when you are pregnant because of all of the hormones and whatnot.

I am glad to hear that you are doing well emotionally. You must be a really strong person because, to be honest, I would probably be a mess if I had to deal with all that you have going on. I think that is great though because the more positive you stay the healthier you and the baby will be.

I know 9 days doesn't sound like a lot to a normal person, but to someone who is trying to hold a baby in it's an eternity. It sounds like things are going really good right now and it also sounds like 9 days is a pretty realistic goal. Have the doctors said anything about wanting the baby to come out earlier?

That is kinda odd that your belly is measuring smaller, but if the doctors aren't concerned then it's probably nothing to worry about.

Kids are so funny sometimes. Mine can't really talk yet so sometimes I just have to look are her and think to myself, "What on earth is going through that head of yours?" Lol. Your kids sound adorable. It also sounds like they have been good and troopers throughout everything too. That's awesome!

I have been praying for you and your baby as well. I will just keep focused on you holding out for at least 9 more days and you try not to cough or sneeze or anything. LOL.

Selena - posted on 03/05/2009

I am doing ok. I have a cold and am completely exhausted. I am not sleeping well either. Physically my body feels like mush. I am so out of shape from being on bedrest for so long. Emotionally I am pretty good. I really want the baby to stay in for another 9+ days, but am staying positive that s/he will be fine. I am wondering why my belly is measuring smaller, but am not letting it drive me crazy.

Speaking of naked daughters. Mine has been running around with no shirt. She says she doesn't gave 'boobies', so its ok...lol

I hope you feel better soon. I have been praying for you and your baby!!

Rachel - posted on 03/05/2009

I know what you mean about wanting a healthy baby. The more the doctor talks about things that potentially could be wrong with the baby the more nervous I get.



I was actually feeling a little under the weather this morning. My sinuses were acting up so I had this terrible sinus headache. There was also a little bit more leakage, but nothing serious. I had to try to take it a little easier today than I have been lately. As you may know it is a little hard to do when you have a toddler who likes to run around naked. I don't know why she started doing it fun she thinks it's funny. I think it's too cold. Lol.



I know you had a good appointment today, but how are you feeling physically and emotionally?

Selena - posted on 03/05/2009

I am hoping for 37w, but am still taking it day by day. I pray a lot and try to stay positive. No matter when this baby arrives, I just want him/her to be healthy and to be able to bring my healthy baby home:)

How are you feeling? Do anything constructive today?

Rachel - posted on 03/05/2009

You have been in my thoughts all day today. I was hoping everything went well with you today. It sounds like it went splendidly. Yeah! You may make it to your goal of 37 weeks after all.



*Hugs*

Selena - posted on 03/05/2009

Rachel - posted on 03/04/2009

That was my thought. I figure if there was blood in the fluid the last time wouldn't there be the next time. I just try to think that maybe they know more than I do.



I can't go to the gym, but at least I can do some housecleaning to get my mind off of things.



You totally have to let me know what they tell you tomorrow. Good Luck!

Selena - posted on 03/04/2009

Crap! So wouldn't they get the same result if your blood is in the fluid? Doctors are so fast to do this stuff and it just puts baby at risk. It seems crazy. I understand it may be better to know things in advance, but 20 weeks is still early.

I am so very sorry that you have more stress added to an already stressful situation. Good thing you can move around a bit and work off some of your anxieties!

I have a doc appt tomorrow and will have the strep test performed. yay

Rachel - posted on 03/04/2009

I wasn't expecting it either. They did the first amnio because my initial bloodwork came back as showing very high Alpha Fetal Proteins which means that the baby is at risk for Spina Bifida. They did the amnio and in the amniotic fluid was a high amount of blood. They first tested to make sure that the blood in the fluid was mine and not the baby's because if it was the baby's blood that means that he would not make it to term. Luckily the blood was mine, but because there was so much of my blood in the fluid my cells made up most of the test sample and they couldn't get enough of the baby's cells to do the tests that needed to be done.

I am not way thrilled about doing another amnio, but I am going to tell the doctor that I am willing to compramise and do another amnio after we are in the safe zone.



So that's where we stand now... Grrrrr!

Selena - posted on 03/04/2009

Oh wow! I totally did not expect this kind of update. Well I hoped your fluid was back up and that would be the end of it:)

I am so sorry that you are having to go through this :( I do not blame you one bit for not wanting the amnio. If they already performed one wouldn't they have those answers anyway? If you don't mind me asking.....why did they do one in the first place? Can't they put it off for 3 mos when the baby has a better survival rate?

((((Hugs)))

Rachel - posted on 03/04/2009

Well... I went to see the specialist today. They said that my fluid level has improved a lot and I could start slowly getting out of bed and moving around. It's not the "it's ok to go to the gym" answer that I was looking for, but it's a start. I think were going to pull through this just fine, but I found out today that we now face a whole new set of challenges.



The U/S are showing that our baby has an unusually thick neck which is appearently a marker for some genetic disorders, so they said that they want to do another amnio. My concern about that is the first amnio was the reason I ended up on bedrest in the first place. We had ourselves a really big scare with being that low on amniotic fluid and it's not something that I am in a big hurry to go through again. I told the doctor that we would not opt for termination even if there was something wrong with the baby, but he informed me that the "thick neck" could change the way that things are done in case of emergency and it's a good thing to know if some important decisions need to be made in a pinch. For instance, if the baby has an abnormality where they wouldn't go to term anyway then they would be more apt to try to save my life vs. putting me at risk to try to save a baby that is not going to survive anyway.



I just feel like if it's not one things it's another....

Selena - posted on 03/04/2009

I gained about 40 lbs when I was on bedrest with my son. This time I'm bouncing between 18-20 lbs, so far. Much better! When I was in the hospital I actually lost 2 lbs. Crazy! Docs didn't even mention it because the u/s showed that baby was fine:)

How long was your recovery time with your daughter?

Anyway, just saying hi and hope your appt went well. Update when you can!

Rachel - posted on 03/03/2009

I know what you mean. I am a HUGE junk food person. While we were waiting for the results from the test my husband wouldn't let me eat anything junk food like.

I am actually really worried about the weight thing myself. Having to be on bedrest, I feel like all I do all day is eat and watch TV. I am usually a very active person and I am afraid that I will blow up like a balloon.



I had an epidural last time and after my c-section I retained A WHOLE LOT of water, so I swelled up for a couple of weeks. They said that the recovery is not so hard on your body if you plan to have a c-section.



I will definately let you know what they say tomorrow and you keep me posted as well.

Selena - posted on 03/03/2009

This diabetes thing sucks! I have never had any issues and really miss eating junk food. Good thing is that I haven't gained as much weight as I did with my others. I hope my body goes back to normal right away. I guess I have to drink that stuff again and have another test at my 6 w postpartum :(

Having a vaginal delivery is not so bad, Of course I always had epidurals:) I am scared we won't get to the hospital in time this pregnancy to get it. After being on bedrest it is much harder to push though. It felt like my son was going to have to get out on his own last time. My muscles were like jello. We'll see what happens this time. I am sure it won't be easy.

Good luck at your appt. Keep me posted!

Rachel - posted on 03/03/2009

I don't have it in me to wait until birth to see what sex the baby is. I would lose my mind. I am so impatient.



They were worried about Gestational Diabetes through my last pregnancy. I had to get the 3 hour test done twice and both times it came back negative. I still have a hard time even thinking about drinking anything orange. Lol.



My ribs hurt so bad through my last pregnancy. You would have thought my daughter was running a marathon or something.



With my daughter I ended up having to have a C-Section. I labored for 13 hours and wouldn't get past 8cm, plus I got an infection while I was in labor so they had to put me on antibiotics. We tried to do a vaginal birth but the doctor just didn't feel it would be a safe option. For this pregnancy we have opted to do another C-Section this time around just to play it on the safe side. I'll be honest... I am not too sad about that. I watch TLC and Discovery Channel all the time and I see what these women go through with vaginal deliveries and, let me tell ya, that is not really something that I was looking way forward to. I give extreme kudos to any woman who goes through it, but it's not for me. I am a wimp. Lol.

Selena - posted on 03/03/2009

I am glad your doctor is watching you so closely. I had weekly ultrasounds with my daughter (doc was ruling out incompetent cervix) and was amazed by the growth, plus its just AWESOME to watch your baby on the monitor!

That sure is a lot of ultrasounds that your baby has his/her legs crossed. Lol Funny how stubborn they can be from so early on :) I could have found out with all my childen, but I like the surprise. My husband and mom know what we are having. I let the u/s tech give my mom a picture of the 'goods' and they think they have it figured out. My husband told my SIL, who begged him, and a co-worker, but other than that no one else knows. I thought he would have slipped in front of me but he has known for a few weeks and is doing good.

Do they know why your daughter had so much fluid? I have gestational diabetes for the first time,. but the docs do not seem to be to concerned. I have not needed insulin and my fluid and baby look good.

Funny how we want the baby to move, but when s/he starts kicking too much we want it to stop.lol My baby is stretching a lot and it can be pretty painful. I feel it in my pelvis and under my ribs.

I have had all my pregnancies vaginally. This baby is head down, so I hope everything goes smoothly. What about you? 

Rachel - posted on 03/03/2009

I am going to see a doctor who specializes in multiples and high risk pregnancies about once a week. I also see my OB at the normal times. It is kind of expensive, but I don't mind going to see the specialist because we do an U/S everytime I go in so I get to see the baby grow week by week. It's really exciting.



This baby is being a little stinker though. We have been to about 4 U/S where we should be able to tell the sex, but he/she won't uncross his/her legs. The sonographer said that she is almost positive it's a boy, but we can't get any good shots. My daughter was the exact opposite. She was not shy at all. I had to see the specialist when I was pregnant with her too because there was too much anmiotic fluid in her sac and they were really worried about it. I would imagine that my daughter had a whole lot more room to move around then this little one considering we are fighting for fluid this time around.



I go back in to see the specialist tomorrow to check the status of the baby's growth and to see if there has been any improvement in the amount of amniotic fluid in the sac. I am pretty optomistic about it because I have seen very little leakage over the past few days and the baby has been very active too. Sometimes I get a little annoyed about getting kicked all the time, but then I remember that activity is a great thing right now and it makes me feel better. After tomorrow's appointment I have another one next Thrusday to check progress again.



I couldn't imagine having to deal with contractions every day. I had Braxton Hicks every day for about two weeks with my daughter and I thought that was bad. It was nothing compared to the real thing.



Are you planning on a vaginal birth or a c-section this time around?

Selena - posted on 03/03/2009

You are so right. Now that I am nearing the end it seems like it is taking forever. I guess being in the hospital was the worst, but everyday had/has its challenges. I have contractions everyday, so I feel like a ticking time bomb.

I have a doc appt this Thursday and another plus ultrasound next Thursday. I am really hoping to get the ultrasound! I never had such a late ultrasound and would love to see how big the baby looks :)

Do you see your doctor often?

Rachel - posted on 03/03/2009

Quoting Selena:

Well I think all of us moms are heroes! lol But thank you!

My husband and I have had many heartbreaks. This is actually my 6th pregnancy. I had a 1st trimester miscarriage that required a d&c. We then lost twins (girl/boy) at 22w4d. At 19 weeks we found I was dilated to 3cm and my daughters bag was bulging. I had an emergency cerclage put in. Shortly after I got an infection and the contractions could not be stopped. They were both born alive but the docs would not help them b/c they were under 24w.

My 1st pregnancy resulted in a full term healthy boy. After the miscarriage and losing the twins, I gave birth to a full term healthy daughter. After her I got pg again. I started dilating at 20 weeks and was on meds and bedrest. Doc induced me at 36w3d b/c I was dilated to 6cm, but was not contracting. I truly think I would have went to 37 weeks, but thank God he was healthy and came home with me :) So 36w3d is my goal for this pregnancy. I would love to get to 37 weeks, but all I care is that the baby is healthy.

I hope this wasn't too much for you. I love talking about my pregnancies and hope to bring some kind of insight to others. There is always hope and trying to stay positive on those bad days can and will help you. I had to remind myself that while laying in that darn hospital bed for those 4 weeks.

My MIL and I have a decent relationship, but when she is raisimg my kids and running my house...its pretty hard to handle. She adores my 22 mos old and does everything for him. He wants to be carried and fed like a 'baby'. I am going to have a newborn and a 2 yr old that will need all my attention. ugh! I have told her to stop and she's getting a little better, but not the way its supposed to be, ya know? 

I hope your bag seals up and you go on to have a healthy pregnancy. I read plenty of books, caught up on tv shows, watched movies and spent time with kids. My husband and I have had plenty of arguments. He has said some crappy things to me, but I tell him to get lost (and lots of other things;). We have come this far and to be jealous and/or mad is ridiculous. This will be our last baby, so he needs to suck it up. I guess I'm just trying to say that no matter what gets in your way...its all worth it :)

 

That sure is a lot to handle. My goodness. I know what you mean about loving to talk about your pregnancies. I think you should write a book though. Lol. I feel like it doesn't matter what I accomplish in my life my kids will always be my biggest achievement, so I love to talk about mine too. This is our last baby too. You don't have too much longer to get to 37 weeks, even though I KNOW it feels like years, so I sure you will make it just fine. Have fun with your new bundle of joy along side your other bundles of joy!

Selena - posted on 03/02/2009

Well I think all of us moms are heroes! lol But thank you!

My husband and I have had many heartbreaks. This is actually my 6th pregnancy. I had a 1st trimester miscarriage that required a d&c. We then lost twins (girl/boy) at 22w4d. At 19 weeks we found I was dilated to 3cm and my daughters bag was bulging. I had an emergency cerclage put in. Shortly after I got an infection and the contractions could not be stopped. They were both born alive but the docs would not help them b/c they were under 24w.

My 1st pregnancy resulted in a full term healthy boy. After the miscarriage and losing the twins, I gave birth to a full term healthy daughter. After her I got pg again. I started dilating at 20 weeks and was on meds and bedrest. Doc induced me at 36w3d b/c I was dilated to 6cm, but was not contracting. I truly think I would have went to 37 weeks, but thank God he was healthy and came home with me :) So 36w3d is my goal for this pregnancy. I would love to get to 37 weeks, but all I care is that the baby is healthy.

I hope this wasn't too much for you. I love talking about my pregnancies and hope to bring some kind of insight to others. There is always hope and trying to stay positive on those bad days can and will help you. I had to remind myself that while laying in that darn hospital bed for those 4 weeks.

My MIL and I have a decent relationship, but when she is raisimg my kids and running my house...its pretty hard to handle. She adores my 22 mos old and does everything for him. He wants to be carried and fed like a 'baby'. I am going to have a newborn and a 2 yr old that will need all my attention. ugh! I have told her to stop and she's getting a little better, but not the way its supposed to be, ya know? 

I hope your bag seals up and you go on to have a healthy pregnancy. I read plenty of books, caught up on tv shows, watched movies and spent time with kids. My husband and I have had plenty of arguments. He has said some crappy things to me, but I tell him to get lost (and lots of other things;). We have come this far and to be jealous and/or mad is ridiculous. This will be our last baby, so he needs to suck it up. I guess I'm just trying to say that no matter what gets in your way...its all worth it :)

Rachel - posted on 03/02/2009

Quoting Selena:

I am so sorry you are on bedrest already. I started bedrest at 22w5d this pregnancy and am still hanging in there at 35w2d. I have preterm labor, so I am dilated, effaced and have daily contractions. I am on Procardia and progesterone injections. I was hospitalized from week 28-32 and am now back home on bedrest.
Being on bedrest at home is so hard, but being in the hospital is so much harder. I have 4 other kids and being away from them was heart wrenching. They did visit often, but it was never enough.
As hard as it seems...you have to let things go. Now I know thats easier said then done~lol. You will have some days when u are screaming your head off and others you will smile and nod :) I have my mother in law helping me and my family and there are days I want to runaway. Other days I just learn to let certain things go, as hard as it may be.
Just remember that this is all for your unborn baby. In the long run, it is so worth it.
Oh! And other people usually do think bedrest is fun. My husband is jealous and has made many stupid comments. Just remember you can't kill 'em and try not to get too stressed...this too shall pass.....

Selena~2nd pg on bedrest
22mos old, 3.5 yr old, 6 yr old, 10 yr old stepson

Oh my goodness! I am so sorry to hear that you have to go through all of this. I think you are my new hero. I thought being on bedrest for a week was hard, and I was only at home. I couldn't imagine having to be in the hospital. You are definately an inspiration to me. Thank you so much for sharing your story. I hope everything works out good for you and your family.

My M-I-L did offer to come up from down south to help us out, but she kinda drives me nuts. I don't know what the relationship is like between you two, but if it's anything like mine KUDOS to you.

It's been hard for me because I am such a control freak and you have none of that when you are on bedrest, but I will definately remember from now on to try to let things go.

I will definately keep my spirits up and keep you in my prayers too. Thank you so much for responding. Good luck!

Selena - posted on 03/02/2009

I am so sorry you are on bedrest already. I started bedrest at 22w5d this pregnancy and am still hanging in there at 35w2d. I have preterm labor, so I am dilated, effaced and have daily contractions. I am on Procardia and progesterone injections. I was hospitalized from week 28-32 and am now back home on bedrest.

Being on bedrest at home is so hard, but being in the hospital is so much harder. I have 4 other kids and being away from them was heart wrenching. They did visit often, but it was never enough.

As hard as it seems...you have to let things go. Now I know thats easier said then done~lol. You will have some days when u are screaming your head off and others you will smile and nod :) I have my mother in law helping me and my family and there are days I want to runaway. Other days I just learn to let certain things go, as hard as it may be.

Just remember that this is all for your unborn baby. In the long run, it is so worth it.

Oh! And other people usually do think bedrest is fun. My husband is jealous and has made many stupid comments. Just remember you can't kill 'em and try not to get too stressed...this too shall pass.....



Selena~2nd pg on bedrest

22mos old, 3.5 yr old, 6 yr old, 10 yr old stepson