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Bedtime ritual is a 'nightmare'

Susie - posted on 01/21/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

My 4 year old daughter,is a nightmare,to get off to bed,since we removed the gate,that locked her in at night.We perform the same ritual night and night again.
She always says that she is not tired,whether it is her regular bedtime of 8pm,or even later.
She will call me back to her bed,over and over again,asking for more kisses and cuddles.If I
don't respond and don't return to her,she will get out of bed and come and find me.
She also loves to use every excuse in the book,to keep me there,or to get me to further
participate,in this annoying battle of wills,at bedtime.I.E: 'I'm scared of the dark',even though her nightlight is on,or 'I need more kisses and cuddles'.'My lips are dry,I need lip gloss' etc.
Eventually,she will give in and go off to sleep,but it's this ritual,of not going off to bed and
staying quietly,in her room,until it is sleep time,that does my head in.This usually lasts for half an hour,after story time and the announcement of bedtime.Do I need to put the gate back on and renegotiate with her,at 5 years old?!!!!!

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Sarah - posted on 02/17/2011

late post.... my son still does that he's 6 almost 7). only i believe that it started with his MiMi she always ran to him when we lived at home (he was 2-4) he would call out to me and when i ignored my mom ran to his side. it's a battle. my husband (his step dad) puts him to bed just fine. i think it's a mom thing. and most definitely a grandma thing at least in my family. He is now starting to go to bed but i also give him 10 mins to get his stuffies and blanket and in bed with lights out then i will go tuck him in and hugs and kisses. it works 95% of the time. he still has the occasional excuse. especially when he talks to his dad on the phone (bedtime at 8, dad calls around 730) he tries to get that extra few mins past 8. even his dad will say it's bedtime. so i think it is a phase. you are not alone with the bedtime blues lol.

Kayla - posted on 02/04/2011

the change of the gate maybe too much of a change in the routine, maybe try putting it back see if it goes back to normal, then slowly start the removal process, i find if i don't have a minute to minute routine every night my girls wont' sleep, (my routine is bed clothes, teeth brush, tuck in, hug, kiss, lights out with an "i love you" you could set your watch to it i bet haha

i personally would put it back, and remove it once she is sleeping for say a week, then start removing it a little earlier (almost asleep or just asleep but do it quietly haha), then tell her she is a big girl and no more gate

Becky - posted on 02/02/2011

try not feel bad my four year old shares a room with her big sister they lay in their beds and talk to each other until the fall asleep for the night. Try taking away things she likes doing during the day and tell her she will get them back when she starts going to bed when she is put there the first time if that does not work try some tips from super nanny it helped my kids to realized that i was not kidding