Need help with disciplin?

Tamara - posted on 02/13/2010

When our son was that age he would bang his head off the floor if he was frustrated so we would get down and do it with him and when he saw how silly it looked he stopped really quick. Also distracting with something else works. Like if we go to the grocery store we always make sure the kids have snacks and are involved with putting things in the cart. Also letting them have a choice on things works like if you know you're buying bread ask them if they want white or brown (they'll say white but it makes them feel good) or type of cookies etc. I don't know what your daughter wants cause if it's a snack or something I'd just give it to her but if she's having a fit over everything I'd just take it away, give her something else to play with and if she fits ignore her cause if she doesn't get that attention from she'll stop really fast!!

Jessica - posted on 02/11/2010

My daughter is 19 months and she too throws fits she did once at the laundry matt and I couldn't intervine fast enough. Smacked her head pretty good on the cement floor and lucky for us the doctors office was right there so I ran her over there. She ended up fine with a nice bruise and the doctor told me that to do time outs like putting her in a chair or play pen for a minute and not giving in. My problem is is that the play pen is in my mothers room because she babysits when im at work. And when I put her in a chair she justs climbs down. We don't have much carpet in the house so when she throws herself down I'm never too sure if she crying now because I wouldn't let her get her way or if she hurt herself so I pick her up and that normally ruins the whole point of not giving in but I can't stand to have her think I don't love her when she hurts herself. Also if she's on my lap when I'm on the computer and she trys to grab for my drink, I'll say no hunnie let me help. I won't take it away from her but all I have to do is get my hands near it and she goes balistic. She's even broken a glass cup on my cheek by freaking (i don't keep glass anywheres i think she might get to now) I know she doesn't really want to hurt me but its getting pathetic and trying to explain things to her makes it worse she won't listen to anything you say I'm out of ideas.

Ashikeha - posted on 02/11/2010

My son is like that, & i really dont like it.
When he gets like that all mad, throws fits, and tantrums.
I try talkign to him seeign whats wrong.
If it dosent work i put him in his room.
When he calms down a bit I go and talk to him.
I tell him how hes actign and that he should be getting mad like that.
Find him something constructive to do or play with him.

Alicia - posted on 02/11/2010

my 19 month old son does the same thing!! and also he is very strong willed he does it at home and in public when he doesn't get what he wants or get his own way. i find just ignoring him works best, even in public, i just sit him in the cart and let him have his fit and then he is fine. at home i put him in his room for maybe 2 minutes, he has his fit and then i go in and sit and hold him and talk to him and let him know i am there, and that everything is ok and he is usually fine.

Danielle - posted on 02/11/2010

My girl is 19 mths and very strong willed. She is no 3 - I have a 16yr old and a 5yr old also. I do do time out - I put her in her cot for a minute, explain why when I put her in and when I take her out. I also hold her and just say "I dont think so this is not what we do", I will count to 3 and say stop - she is learning and starting to calm herself down very quickly. Do they ever listen to their parents though ;)

Sarah - posted on 02/10/2010

My daughter is 19 months and so far, thank goodness, she has only ever had one tantrum, which was in public. I just ignored her and she soon stopped. When she is doing somethng she shouldnt or is being naughty though 'time out' does work for me but only if i follow every step properly. I think it helps too that her time out spot is a little colourful chair that she helped choose.

Laura - posted on 02/10/2010

my son is only 19months old and hes been having tantrums for awhile now when he doesnt get his own way! i find it very hard not to lose my temper and shout but the more i shout the more he screams an throws himself on the floor, i havent tried the time out as think hes abit young an cant imagine it workin yet, i get very embarrassed and stressed out in public, any suggestions on dealing wiv tantrums would be grateful, thanks

Christina - posted on 02/10/2010

I started doing Time Out against the wall but he tends to throw his head into the wall :-( . He does not like his play pen any more so this is now my designated spot. He only has to stay in there 1 min once he has calmed down. Make sure she knows why, but use simple terms like "no biting" and point to her mouth for example. Remember this process takes time and this is the age they begin to test their boundries. Be calm, summon some patience and it does work. Tristan only throws a bigger fit when I yell, so I make a point of being calm. Hope this helps hun.

Leah - posted on 02/10/2010

Some of you have mentioned time outs and I was wondering where you do them. Do you have them sit somewhere or what? My daughter has been throwing those fits and I'm about to lose it! I don't know if it's just her age or the fact that we have a new baby in ths house as of November...or maybe a little of both! Thoughts?

Kara - posted on 02/10/2010

I find that (like other mums) walking a short distance away and just letting my boy throw his tantrum when he sees that i have walked away he tries to follow me and hit me or throw things, he usually gets ova it quickly though i have found that explaining to him that he is being silly only makes him worse, and singing does help or dancing... hope it helps xxx

Christina - posted on 02/09/2010

WITH MY 19 MONTH OLD I GET ON THE FLOOR YES EVEN A THE STORE AND THROW A FIT WITH HER.. SHE HATES IT OR I WALK AWAY SAY BYE BYE AND IGNORE HER... SHE STOPS WITH HER FIT

Emily - posted on 02/09/2010

My son does this to. He is 18 months old and is the King of fit throwing. Our pediatrician said if he is doing something wrong tell him no and point him to something he can do right. It works with the fit throwing as well. I pick him up bounce him a second kiss his forehead tell him that that is a no no and sit him down to play with something else. They are too young to fully grasp the "why can i not do it" they know they can't they just do not understand the why. Try that and I hope it works for you.

Christina - posted on 02/09/2010

We have to remember that up until this point they have gotten what they want/needed by crying. They are just learning to ask. When we say no we can not stop at the word "no" and expect them to understand. Believe it or not, my son is calmer with less tantrums when I explain to him why I have to tell him no. He really seems to understand for the most part. When he does continue, I tell him he will have to go to time out. That does the trick every time ;-)

Brandee - posted on 02/09/2010

I usually choose to ignore the tantrum as long as Brandon is in a safe place. If I need him to be calmed down sooner I find something to distract him and get his mind off of why he is unhappy. When we go out I make sure to bring some toy cars, books, and colors. It also helps to sing "The Wheels on the Bus" with him because he can do the hand motions which takes up his attention at that time. We have decided not to implement any time outs until he is closer to 2.

Shamada - posted on 02/08/2010

OMG!!! My daughter, Jaidon has recently started doing the same thing. It drives me crazy. I've been trying to ignore her until she stops, but I'm not sure how much longer my patience will allow me to do this. I pray that this is just a stage that she is going through and that this too shall pass.

Lou - posted on 02/08/2010

Ellie is a little monkey and has loads of little tantrums, do you find it is when you say something specific? I find if she is doing something I don't want - like drawing on the wall, I say "no Ellie" and that one little word NO sends her off on a rampage of throwing thing, hitting and screaming, so now I have resorted to please don't do that Elenor, which has calmed her alot, plus distractions, singing etc. But you know your little girl best and you will know what will suit her, I would say ride it out and when shes not looking scream into a pillow!!! Hahahahaha! Let me know how you go and if you come up with any great ideas I would love to know! xxx

Nikkita - posted on 02/08/2010

if talkin doesnt work ill put her somewhere safe for her to kick n scream then i walk away she usually follows me after about a min wantin a cuddle. i work with children in a nursery and have learned that half the time its not because they havent got their own way its because they dont understand why they cant have it their way. its important that when the tantrum is over our children know we love em. let me know how u get on xxxxxx

Beth - posted on 02/07/2010

Ignoring her is often a good idea, as long as she isn't throwing things, hurting herself, etc.
Sometimes distractions work...sing a fun song like "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes" or the "Itsy Bitsy Spider," or run around and act really silly.
Also try to be careful about giving in to her when she screams. Our kiddos are defnintely old enough to realize that they can get what they want by screaming.

Leonna - posted on 02/06/2010

My daughter does the same thing. Depending on why she is screaming, sometimes it's best to ignore her. Just make sure she is safe and give her some distance while still keeping an eye on her. When I do this my daughter usually calms down in a couple of minutes and forgets why she was crying.

Danielle - posted on 02/06/2010

I calmly give my daughter the mommy look and tell her that I understand she is upset but her acting out in that manner is unacceptable... it usually works. Just be sure she is not trying to tell you something first like, wet diaper, tired, hungry, thirsty or is teething. Its certainly easier to stay calm when not in public.

Pamela - posted on 01/30/2010

My daughter is just the same. I usually sit with her or hold her (if she let's me) and tell her that I love her anyway. And I try to act as normal as I can without beeing stressed out (even though I am, especially in puplic).

I think it helps her to see that I have everything under control (since she's lost it already) and to know that I love her.

Sometimes I sing or hum, it helps me not to scream.