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night time

Theresa - posted on 09/24/2010 ( 1 mom has responded )

99

2

oh i am about out of patiences.....im sooo sick of hearing dont want to that i could scream i dont flipping care go to sleep! my daughter fights sleep soooo much and she will only sleep if i lay down beside her. i work 40hrs a wk by 9pm im beat n cant go no more. so when i lay down w/ her im out i dont want to sleep w/ her cuz thats what im trying to break the habit of. she dont sleep all night and when she does wake up in the morning she wont again fall back to sleep til i lay down w/ her and she screams she dont want to she wants to "moma wake....ups" im out of ideas i need help please!
tks.

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Amy - posted on 10/11/2010

254

45

Is she in a toddler bed, or a crib? It sounds like she needs to learn to get herself to sleep, and to do that, I personally think she needs to be left alone, as hard as it is. If she crawled out of a crib, there are crib tents you can get to put over it so that she can't get out. Maybe just try laying her down and telling her that you're absolutely not coming back in, so she may as well go to sleep. And then the hard part - don't go back in there. If she screams, let her scream (as long as she's safe and can't hurt herself). She WILL eventually go to sleep, I promise. When they're this age, though, they are awfully hard-headed, and the crying could last for quite awhile. But it sounds like she's not scared of being alone, she just doesn't want to be, so it's not really a matter of affecting her well-being, it's just about breaking her will. She needs to know that you are the mother, and she needs to obey you, regardless of whether or not she wants to. (Obviously, this is a hard thing for a 2-year-old to understand, but they can understand that when you say you're not coming back in, you're NOT coming back in). It may take a few days (even up to a couple of weeks, depending on how stubborn she is! It would take at least a week with my son!) But you have to remember, you have to be consistent. If you let her cry for 3 nights, then the 4th night, you go in to her when she's screaming for you, you have just set yourself back a great deal. I hope this helps.

Another thought is that you can gradually move out of the room. For example, one night, you can sit right next to her bed, with a hand on her. Then the next night, you sit next to her without your hand on her. Then the next night, you move a foot away, etc., until you are next to the door, then out of the room altogether. But you have to remember, too, that YOU need to be ready to lay her down. Only do it when YOU are ready to deal with whatever comes next. If you're not in the mindset to hear her cry, then don't lay her down, because again, if you are inconsistent, it just sets you back.

Good luck, and I hope some of this helps. :)

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