temper tantrums starting now?!

VANESSA - posted on 09/17/2009

My daughter is 14 months and she is going threw the same thing...my problem is how to correctly punish her without hitting because i use to pop her hand and is no longer helping. Now she wants to hit me and so i stopped. I can't tell if I should just ignore her and let her have the tantrum or pick her up??

Amanda - posted on 09/16/2009

My little man is my third child and all three of mine started throwing tantrums at this age but my little man likes to not only scream but try to smack whatever is close when he is upset ~ The way I control it is to never pop them when they are angry. I believe that if you pop them even barely when they see you as upset then they learn that when they are upset they should hit. The same thing goes with raising your voice so I sit on the floor in front of him and grab and hold his hands. I hold him hands and talk to him until he calms down ~ In a calm but stern voice I tell him "You do not hit Mommy" "Be nice Blaine" or I reinstate why I took the cup away or made him get off the fireplace.. It seems to work for me so I hope that this helps someone.

Heather - posted on 09/16/2009

Too funny Erika. Well maybe not, but kind of is, right? Anna is doing the same thing. I also thought tantrums started closer to 2 yrs of age. About a month or so ago Anna started this thing where she sits on the ground and throws her head between her legs like in a yoga pose and cries. If I try to comfort her she shakes her hands wildly like "mama don't touch me" I think the best thing to do at this age is ignore it. If you cater to it she will learn she will get attention from it. You can say no no and then ignore it, but more than no no and I just think kids at this age are really not well equipped to learn too much right from wrong. By ignoring the negative behavior I think they just get over themselves:)

Jenny - posted on 09/15/2009

seems that everyone here has the same problem. Tarin-Jade started with tantrums when she started walking (at 12 1/2 months) so im getting use to the throw myself on the floor if i don't get what i want but its a bit harder getting use to her trying to bite me if i now ignor her. So i just go away and leave her on her own or bring her in her room. She stays there for about 10 min and plays, she forgets what she was doing and just sits there and plays. After a while she comes to me with a toy and gives it to me babbles something on carrys on playing. I leave her door open abit so she can get out which she only does when she is ready to come out otherwise i put her back in. With the changing....well i can't keep her still.



Wait till the throwing tantrums start :) we're in the middle of it.

Melanie - posted on 09/05/2009

I have the very same problem! Thanks to the mom show, I think I may have a solution. As hard as it is not to laugh at them (because it IS funny).

First of all, when they are doing something wrong and you want to tell them "no", you need to get down to their eye level and do it. Then when they have a temper tantrum over it, just act like you don't hear it and keep going about your dishes or what watching your show or whatever you were doing. Eventually they should stop. I'm still working on it, so I'll let you know how it goes!!

Mandira - posted on 09/05/2009

My son at 14 months is starting to do the same but when he starts I pick him up hug him and when he smiles I tell him not to scream at mummy .... it has worked so far ..... hope this helps.

Tara - posted on 09/04/2009

Yes Jared has been doing it a lot. What I try to do(works about 80% of the time) is give him something else to do. Like if I'm taking one of his sisters things away from him I say "That is Samantha's toy lets play with this car"

Renay - posted on 09/04/2009

I have two older children and was not sure how to dicipline them when they threw tantrums at a young age but over the years through chatting to other mums with younger children I have learnt that even at one, getting a child used to time out is ok. My 14 month old son gets put into his cot for a minute every time he throws a tandy and it seems to help. It will also get him used to time out. Time out increases to 1 minute per age as he gets older eg he will be put into time out for 2 minutes at 2 etc. I am plannning on getting a time out mat for him to sit on as he gets older the key is to be persistant to keep them on this mat for the amount of time allocated even if they come off they need to be put back. This is known to work.

Victoria - posted on 09/03/2009

Erika, My middle child (boy) started throwing them at 1. He has been very challenging for me! But he is also my biggest Love! He would throw them the most when he couldn't tell me what he needed! A phrase I used and still use is...USE YOUR WORDS. SHOW MOMMY WHAT YOU NEED! Hang in there! My son is almost 4 now and he is still a challenge! But I wouldn't want him any other way!

Lauren - posted on 09/02/2009

My son has been doing this for a few months now as well. I do spank him. If I ignore him he will head butt the wall, throw himself on the floor, and I am afraid he will hurt himself. Plus I do not like him to throw fits in public. So I pop his bare leg and he cries but the kicking and screaming stops.

CeeJae - posted on 08/02/2009

Yay it's not only my child!! Kendall does the same thing she will throw tantrums over anything. Mostly if I take something away from her. She will headbutt and throw herself back.

Ann - posted on 07/27/2009

I am soo glad I am not alone in this! My daughter has been doing it more frequently over the past month. it started with the dog leash which she loves to carry around the house, which is fine unless we actually need to walk the dog! now she has started doing it in her crib, I stand there and when she starts calming down I will start to pick her up but if she starts up again I put her back so she is learning and she doesnt scream for as long as when I was trying to calm her down myself, now I leave it up to her but it is hard to watch!

Jessica - posted on 07/26/2009

My daughter started with the tantrums at 9months which was a rude awakening! My partner and I just walk away when she throws a tantrum over anything. If she clings to us screaming we put her in her play pen or her cot and walk away. If she starts again the moment we walk back into the room we turn around and walk out again.

She still throws tantrums but they dont last for nearly as long as they used to. When we are friends of families places we stand our ground and do the same thing so that she knows the rules are the same no matter where we are (we make sure we have the porta cot with us always so we have somewhere safe to put her)!

Good luck guys. I think we have very long roads ahead of us.

Erika - posted on 07/25/2009

I wish ignoring would work on her- she gets the high pitched squeal that gets raspy in the middle and it hurts my ears. I dunno how the heck she does it but oh dear lord i wish i had a mute button for it.i go hide in my kitchen ( my apt is so baby proof its ridiculous) once i leave the room it stops but when i walk back in she starts it again. did i mention she hangs on my legs and i have to pry her off with the jaws of life?? Im so worried she is gonna end up a spoiled lil brat.

Tina - posted on 07/24/2009

My boy is doing this also. I have to say I just ignore him, and it eventually stops. The more attention I give to it, the more it goes on, so I just dont feed into it anymore and it seems to be working.

Bethany - posted on 07/24/2009

I agree with Christine- I try to ignore it as much as possible...which is SOOOO easier said than done sometimes (especially the times when I want to just sit down and scream myself!!!) I was not prepared for the attitude this early :(

Christine - posted on 07/24/2009

My son has been 'testing the waters'. I am trying to hold my ground now (I have so little left - the first year is brutal). The only method that seems to work at all is to walk away (as long as he is in a safe place like his playpen or crib) and let him work it out on his own. This seems to make the next time shorter.

Relative to diaper changes, we have been doing toys, songs, or something he finds funny (like my wet hair in the morning tickling his face).

My last resort is nap or early bedtime if he just seems to be overtired and grumpy about everything.

Erika - posted on 07/22/2009

haha oh we are soo lost aren we ladies ! lol

my baby bible aka what to expect the toddler years just says its "developmentally correct" and our lovelies are in the 14% catagory cuz they are under 2 yrs. it goes on and on with "ways" to head them off but honestly its not working...



Rhya doesnt mind diaper changing, its just toys and juice fits, so i guess im thankful for that lol

Amanda - posted on 07/22/2009

I'm really sorry my daughter also does this but I really have no clue how to handle it. I'm praying this is just a phase and will not continue much longer. So far I've tried distracting her with toys/food. That only works half the time and not for diaper changes which usually is a two person job at our home. Letting her cry it out works only when my husband is not around because he tries to coddle her as soon as she cries for longer than about 2 seconds. (which makes me look like an even bigger meanie and is very frustrating). So good luck and I really hope someone has some good advice soon.

Denise - posted on 07/22/2009

Yes, she throws them often, over many things! She has been doing this for at least a month now :( Ava especially hates to be changed, whether it be her diaper, or her clothes. She starts screaming and kicking and tries to escape! Ava also will sit on the ground and scream if I take something away from her. If anyone has any suggestions on how to deal with them, I would love to hear!!!!