Rachel - posted on 07/03/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )
Okay ladies...I am beyond frustration. What can be expected from grandparents?
Please forgive the book, but you need to hear the story. My daughter is 11 months old now, and the first, long awaited grandchild on both sides of our family. I know they love her, I hear they brag about her to anyone that will listen. And I do not expect them to spoil her, but they rarely get her anything, nor help with anything we actually need.
The in-law grandma decided to ignore us completely for my daughters first Thanksgiving AND Christmas. She's given her some clothes that she purchased while I was pregnant and a few ceramic collectibles. She sends $5 every time and again in a card only addressed and written to Isabel. The last time we visited her, she showed me the bowls that she'll save for cooking with her when she's ooohhhh...3-5? The other granny will seemingly only shop at garage sales for her. She's bought her a fischer price train and five outfits that she raved about spending a "fortune" on. There are of course the odd small trinket or ball from a shop, crane machine or fair.
Now I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I've seen them give more to other family and friends at baby showers alone. And this is what we get before we hear all about them having $9 grand leftover from a loan, spending $40 for a gallon of paint or getting a entire Wii System for working out, oh and lets not forget the details of the regular full body massages.
What really did it, was that my mom gave my daughter her first birthday present this past June, that she bought this past May. Note my daughters birthday is July 28th and her party is August 1st. They were up for the rare visit and handed me - a plastic kroger bag. Inside, was a 0-6 month latex rubber pacifier; a sippy cup; and...a 24 month romper. All this with the instruction that this was her FIRST BIRTHDAY present.
So lets see, I've long told her Isabel will only take a certain pacifier (and I'm allergic to latex), not to mention she's 12 months now; I've long told her that Isabel will not drink from sippy cups so we've just started her on cups; and she's given her a dress that she can't wear till NEXT summer...all in a plastic kroger bag that they quickly pulled out fishing lures from before they handed me. What do I do? Because this gift is the exact example of what we have come to expect from them. Bupkiss.
Even the hairdresser asks me what great things the grandparents have done for my daughter. To which, I have to lie. The dental hygentist gave her neighbor's 1 year old a $60 toy car and I can't even get them to wrap my daughters birthday present in more then a plastic kroger bag?
I grew up with grandparents that always came thru with the bigger things that parents can't afford with all the costs of daily living. That always had a corner for me in their house. I can't get my parents or in-laws to even get more then a picture of my daughter in thier house. Note...pictures that we bought and sent to them.
My husband and I have kept our mouths closed and cheeks turned but we could use some support or suggestions. Thanks...