Getting my son to sleep all night

Heather - posted on 04/29/2010

Ok. My daughter was having this issue. We just started sleep training. I was concerned because you let them cry but it is really working. Put her to bed awake. In 5 min go in but only for one minute and don''t pick her up. Calm her and leave her down. Then wait 7 min, then 10, then 12, them 15. Then every 15 minutes. The first night she cried 90 minutes, the second twelve and the third 6.
I weaned out the night feedings first by just rocking her to sleep without feeding her on feeding at a time. She's only 16 pounds at 9 months because she was early but the dr. says she's doing great and she makes it through the night fine.

Gemma - posted on 04/29/2010

my baby girl is 9 months and i also had problems with her sleepin she also goes bed at 7 and i found that wakin her before i went 2 bed and given her a bottle helped a little i was also told that if u put somethin with ure smell in there cot it helps i tried that last nite by puttin my pillow in and she slept through till 5 this morn i am keepin my fingers crossed that the same happens 2nite i hope this helkps a little and ure little one starts sleepin through soon xx

Cheyenne - posted on 04/29/2010

I stopped breastfeeding about a week ago, I wasn't producing enough milk for him to get full so now he is on homogonized milk and guess what?.... HE SLEEPS ALL NIGHT! its great, I am so happy. I guess the problem was that he wasnt getting enough nutrition from me which is why he was waking up so much but now that my problem is fixed I am happy, and he is a lot happier too considering he is more rested. Good luck to all of you whom still have waking babies, I hope it works out for you

Van - posted on 04/21/2010

my baby is 8months old. he wakes up twice at night and asks for milk. I think this is just normal with babies his age. The waking up thru d night will also pass. dont worry, in a matter of months your dilemma will be over

Ashlee - posted on 04/21/2010

I wish I had time to read all the responses, but sharing from my experience... my son is 9 months old and he sleeps nearly all night. I breastfeed him once around 4-6am, then he goes back to sleep til 8ish... but it took training for him to be like that. I had to let him cry quite a bit - but it only took a few consistent nights. (However, he takes a pacifier, so that has helped.) But yeah, he'd cry and I'd go into him and put the pacifier back in and tell him firmly to go to sleep and keep doing that every 5mins or so... honestly, sometimes it'd take hours, but it is so worth it now to have a good nights sleep! Even now, he wakes at say 3, but I make him wait until at least 4... I don't think I'm being mean by refusing to feed him, because I know he's not hungry, but it's just the comfort that he enjoys. (If he cries endlessly, I offer water in case he's thirsty.) My husband doesn't always appreciate it, but he's learned to sleep through it. I do feed him in our bed, but I never let him sleep with us - now just by putting him in his cot/crib, he knows that means sleep.

Anyway, hope this has helped! I truly believe consistency is the key; even at 9 months, they are very intelligent little beings :)

Kilea - posted on 04/19/2010

Hi Cheyenne, I have a 9 month old daughter and have just given up b/feeding in the last month it was one one the toughest 2 weeks for both of us as its emotional giving up that bonding experience, however 2weeks after she started having the bottle (formula) she began to sleep through till 4 - 5 in the morning and now she is starting to sleep to 7 in the morning. when she got her first tooth and bit me I was like "right thats it" LOL ... it has to be when your ready as the 1st week is tough and you feel guilty as but you know what they wont starve as they are still getting their 3 meals a day and if they are thirsty enough they do finally take it. I remember she took 30mls and I was so excited and after that I was happy with anything she drank whether it be 30mls or 100mls they will drink what they need. GOOD LUCK

Heidi - posted on 04/19/2010

There is no magic secret trick to get your baby to sleep through the night.

http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/...

This is a great article about baby sleep.

We stopped co-sleeping with our oldest daughter when she was 12 months. And she "magically" started sleeping through the night in her own room. For about 2 months. Then she started to have night wakings due to teething and other things. At almost 3, she still wakes up a few times a week to the point where i need to go to her and get her settled back in. We do not let her CIO - not even at this stage of her life. CIO has been proven to be ineffective and possibly detrimental in the long run - as all it really teaches babies is to shut down, not to calm down.

I know it can be frustrating, but just hang in there. Your baby may sleep longer stretches when they are in a quiet room without the sounds and smells of mom and dad right there. They may not. Some babies sleep better with parents some sleep better alone.

Our 9 month old still wakes several times in the night. She mostly just comfort nurses and falls right back to sleep - and she really chows down about once a night. So she is definitely still needing at least 1 night feed at this point. It feels good to nurse and nurture her back to sleep.

We just spent 2 weeks at grandmas last month. I was afraid that the baby would wake the toddler as we were all sharing a room together. The toddler slept through everything. So don't worry about waking your toddler when it's time for them to share a room - as long as you don't let your baby scream, you should be OK.

Cassie - posted on 04/16/2010

i have always used the bottle so it cant be that and she is always full when going to bed so i am out of ideas nothing seems to work, i think my children just dont like to sleep

Cheyenne - posted on 04/08/2010

I have another son, he will be 2 in May and the only way to get him to sleep all night is to put him to bed with a sippy cup with a little bit of water, not full with water, about half way. He wouldn't sleep all night until I did that and it has been working like a charm for almost a year. He was a little over a year old when he started sleeping all night. He wasn't breastfed though.
My 9 month old is still not sleeping. I have been trying some of the things that people have posted, Thanks a lot by the way, they did come in handy.
Letting him cry doesnt work. He wakes up my fiance and then he is not happy, plus I live in an apartment building so other people don't really appreciate it either. I tried giving him his food earlier, like around 5 and then I usually give him a bottle afterwards and nurse him before he goes to sleep but it seems like he still wakes up for a night time feeding. Now it is not as often as it was. So it is helping. I am beginning to think that maybe it is just a comfort thing because he doesnt really suckle a lot, I think its so he knows that I am there. But it needs to stop none the less. He doesn't take a pacifier, I have tried everyone out there, so that is out of the question. It took me a while before he would even drink out of a bottle, I just got that mastered.
I am going to continue to try the other things that people have posted! Thanks once again!

Cassie - posted on 04/08/2010

i also have the same problem with my 9month old daughter and can not let her cry her self back to sleep as i also have a 3 year old daughter, and if they wake each other during the night it is absolute caos in my house. unfortunatly i dont have the answer either as my 3 year old still wont sleep through without waking at least once. so if u find somthing that works please let me know as i am also working full time and would love to get some sleep befor my children are teenages.

Amanda - posted on 04/05/2010

OMG my daughter (now 9) never slept through the night until she was 6 & I tried everything!! My now 9 mth old BF son is starting the same patterns but I never thought to do the waking thing in the morning, I have tried EVERYTHING else so will try this and fingers crossed, a whole nights sleep would be bliss :-)

Jacinta - posted on 04/04/2010

I posted earlier and wanted to add some things i had forgotten :) In my researching I found out that at 9 months, babies have a change in their sleep cycles [*sleep cycles are the stages of going from half asleep to deep sleep- like when we roll over in our sleep] which is why many bubs start waking up again when they were already sleeping through before. The problem is, before this age they were quite happy for us to put them back to sleep and were more liekly to drift back to asleep without waking. However, at 9 months they now know how to keep themselves awake crying out "I don't want to go to sleep!" (even if they are tired!). So now we need to teach them how to put themselves to sleep so that they can resettle in their new sleep cycles.

I mentioned how I achieved this but I meant to add that my son sucks his thumb- so this is how he clamed himself. I also introduced a "cuddly blanket" (just a facecloth- much easier to wash than a toy!!). Some may have said I was silly for actually giving him a cuddly as I will have to get rid of it later, but it helped my son a lot as he likes to have something in his free hand- he used to grab onto my pj top while feeding. Before I gave him the cuddly, I tucked it into my shirt for awhile so it would smell like me. He also likes to hold it up against his cheek. When I lie him down at night I give it to him- now he holds out his hand for it- but I only ever give it to him in his cot.

While dummies can be good for settling, they are not ideal for resettling if bub can't find it by themselves. One technique I read about to solve this was to tie a little "pot" (container) to the end of the bed and put the dummy in it, then teach your baby that's where the dummy is kept. That way they can easily crawl and get it out themselves - I read you can also do this with a drinking cup/bottle of WATER (not a food drink like milk or juice though).

I am by no means an expert and you may not agree with anything I have written. But as a very tired mother at the end of her rope I was ready to try anything. I truly hope you find something that works for you all. :)

Renae - posted on 04/03/2010

i also have the same problem with mi 9mnth old he is bttle feed and wakes up 4 5 times a nyt its very tieing and he has plentty of t plus he has sum fruit for supper he will nt go to sleep without a bottle grrr lol he also wakes up a few times just for his dummy

Sonya - posted on 04/03/2010

My son is 9 months old and started sleeping through at 3 months. When he turned 6 months old he began waking up. I never fed him during the night and still dont but he still wakes. I tried him back on his old formula as i did change it around 6 months old and he went back to sleeping through for one week and is now back waking again. I have tried everything i can think of to get him sleeping through again. When he wakes i give him his pacifier and he goes back to sleep but i really want him to learn to go back to sleep on his own. Its so hard!!!

Allison - posted on 04/02/2010

My 9 month old son started sleeping through the night at about 6 months. When I took my son to his 6 month dr. appointment, my pediatrician "scolded" me for him not sleeping through the night. He said there is no reason for him not to be. I had a really hard time crying it out and asked him for some suggestions. He recommended that we cut his night time bottle in half for a couple of days and then try water. Eventually he would stop waking up for it. We did actually have to let him cry a little but it wasn't hysterically so I could handle it. The good thing was it really only took 3 days. The key is being consistant and staying with it. It will pay off in the end. He did really great until he started teething. Good luck!

Prarthna - posted on 04/02/2010

My son has completed 8 months and i am also facing the same problem.He is also on brestfeeding n dosen't take the bottlefeed. I tried feeding him solid at eight in night n put him to sleep by 9 : 30 but he wakes after every 2 to 3 hrs.In whole day also he sleeps only for 2 hrs max.Though he is too active but still he has very less sleep.I tried out everything but not of any help.if u have any suggestion do let me knw

Jessi - posted on 04/02/2010

Give him Motrin and Hyland's teething tablets (you have to do like 7-10 tablets for them to work). At some point you will have to let him cry it out. He may just be waking up to drink. I gave my oldest (now 2) son a sippy cup with water in it. He would still wake up and cry a little, but it only took a few days and he figured it out. He would just drink a little water and go back to sleep.
It was really hard to do, but after a few days when you are sleeping all night you will be glad you did!!

Jennifer - posted on 04/02/2010

And if you feel that way that is completely your choice. If you don't want to stop that is up to you. I'm just saying. he will not starve without the feeding I promise even if he is going through a growth spurt. Just feed him more during the day. If he is teething it still wont matter. My daughter has been teething since she was about 4 months old. I'm just saying most of the reasons seem to be you having trouble letting go and I understand it's hard they are your babies but they don't NEED it. But that is just my input. I have a almost 4 year old and an 8 month old. I get great sleep they are both in bed by 8. What I do with my little one before bed for soothing is give her a bath then give her 6 oz of formula and send her to bed. That gives her a nice soothing bath and a bottle and a cuddle before bed. She sleeps till at least 7:30 every morning.

Traci - posted on 04/02/2010

Why do the night time feedings need to stop? He could be going through a growth spurt and not only need the sustenance, but also your comfort. Or he could be teething. Or he could be experiencing separation anxiety.

Jennifer - posted on 04/02/2010

I'm a bit about tough love. My Daughter has been sleeping 12 hours a night for about 4 months. If he is waking up to feed it's because you still do feed him. He does not need the food for nutritional value it's more a comforting thing. He is strong enough to make it through the night without out it. My advise is to stop feeding him. It will be hard at first but it wont take long and he will sleep through the night. He is used to eating now if you stop feeding him he will still wake up for a while but he will learn to sooth himself back to sleep.

Brittany - posted on 04/02/2010

I had the same problem with my 8 month old and my pediatrician gave me some stuff to read. Does your baby use a pacifier? If he does try giving it to him when he wakes up instead of feeding him, if he takes it then he just wants something to suck on and he's not really hungry. Another thing the packet said was don't change wet diapers just poopy ones, I put vaseline on my son to prevent diaper rash before he goes to bed. Good luck, hope these help :)

Cheyenne - posted on 04/02/2010

Wow, I didn't expect all the feedback but it is greatly appreciated. I will definitely try all the suggestions that I haven't yet and will let everyone know what works! Hopefully something does. (fingers are crossed)

Lamia - posted on 04/02/2010

i agree with Amber, and it happened to me too, my daughter turned 8 monthes last month and when she sleeps with me in bed she wakes up many times at night sometimes just to feel the breast in her mouth and she comes back to sleep, i think it's very important for them to sleep in their own bed why not another room, now my abby sleeps in her bed and soemtimes if she waks up i just calm her without feeding her and she sleeps the whole night.
they smell us and they feel in security close to us, dono worry it happens to all moms and once he gets used to be independant he will sleep the whole night, try rice cereal 2 hours before he sleeps .

good luck

lamisse

Jacinta - posted on 04/02/2010

Hi Cheynne, I feel your pain! My son has just turned 9 months and up until this week has woken up and fed every two hours through the night - EVERY night (he is breastfed & eats solids). I read lots of books to find solutions (I don't have the strength for crying it out so avoided those strategies) and realised I had created his bad habit of associating going to sleep with a breastfeed (I always fed him to sleep) so when he woke up in his cot in the middle of the night of course he needed me to feed him to go back to sleep! So I started feeding him 15min before bed in the loungeroom and then put him to sleep awake. I would do the same thing everytime - go in, lie him back down and say "Lie down, go to sleep" rub his head and then sit next to the cot (I did this for the first 2 nights, then I would leave the room) I also combined this with the routine of me going in and waking him up in the morning rather than letting him cry out for me to get him - otherwise how would he learn the difference between crying in the middle of the night for me to come and get him, to it being morning? He now knows it's not time to get up until I wake him (now instead of us having to get up 5am, he goes back to sleep and I wake him at 7!) It took 2 nights of me consistently saying "Lie down, go to sleep" before he started to understand. Then I would let him cry for a little bit before going in- but it wasn't actually crying, more like calling out. If he was really crying I wouldn stay sitting next to his cot, but kept making him lie down while reassuring him. I did this for his two daytime sleeps as well. On the third night he woke for two hours in the middle of the night, on the fourth night he woke for 50min, on the fifth night he slept for 11 hrs straight and on the 6th night he slept from 7pm - 7am - with me going in to wake him in the morning!! I changed nothing in his food patterns. Every baby is different of course and maybe he will just grow out of it, but the best book i found was "Baby Dream Guide" by Sheyne Rowley.

I hope I don't sound like a bragger saying "In just 5 days my baby now sleeps through the night", believe me I know how crazy it sounds, but it is very true- my husband and i are still in shock! Those first 3 days were really hard though and you have to be consistent and dedicated (I explained to my 3yr old daughter what I was doing to reassure her), but the benefits are so much more than just me getting a better sleep - he is a different baby!! I hope bub starts to sleep a bit better for you though :)

Amber - posted on 04/01/2010

The teething tablets I get are the homeopathic tablets, they are in a light blue and pink box, I find them at walgreens but I know other places sell them. They just dissolve in their mouth, I think it recommends giving them 3 at a time. As far as motrin goes, I use the infant motrin. It's some berry flavor made for infants. It's like 1.25mL, and it works wonders for my daughter! Also something I found works is a very consistent bedtime routine. At 7:30 I give my daughter a bath, then I give her a baby massage in her room with the lights dim, then I read to her, then she gets her bottle at about 8:00 and then she's off to bed with no problems. I think the consistency at night is the most important because they know what to expect and when they go through the routine, it cues them in to bed time. Hope some of this is helpful to you. I know your struggle because my daughter was a terrible sleeper for months and now I am SO thankful I listened and tried all the things I was told. Bedtime routine and motrin, wonderful things!

Stacey - posted on 04/01/2010

Hi Cheyenne, I find with my DS that if he eats his dinner later on in the night he will often wake up earlier as he is thirsty. He generally goes to bed between 7-7.30 and has his solids about 5.30pm with a breastfeed straight before bed. I was giving solids about 6-6.30pm until it was suggested to bring this back earlier. Now if he wakes before midnight I will let him cry for about 5 mins or so and if he won't settle himself I will go in and only give him a drink of water. If he wakes up after midnight or closer to 2am I will breastfeed him as then he is usually hungry.

My SIL and a few others gave their babies water when they woke up rather than breastfeeding them to try and teach them that they weren't getting any mummy and so there was no point in waking up. You could give this a try and see how it goes?

Good luck with it all & with the move :)

Denene - posted on 04/01/2010

...also, a warm bath (believe it or not, Johnson's Bedtime Bath & Lotion works miracles!) may work :)

Denene - posted on 04/01/2010

I would try giving him some/more solid food. Although he probably isn't waking because he's hungry, it could be anything, but it may help. Good luck :)

Sarah - posted on 04/01/2010

When my 9 mth old wakes up at night I let her cry for about 5 mins then if she starts to get very worked up I pick her up keeping the room dark and hold her close to calm her down, she usually falls back to sleep quickly and won't wake again. If she wakes after I've put her down I leave her in the cot and put my hand on her head stroking it, until she stops. The whole process can take 20 mins but I don't offer food her nurse her, just reassurance that Mom is here...and I think that after a while she realises that its not worth waking up just for that !

Christy - posted on 04/01/2010

feed him a jar of baby food before you put him to bed

Melissa - posted on 04/01/2010

Motrin makes infant pain reliever. It comes with a mouth syringe and how much you give them depends on their weight. I go to Target to get there store brand product instead on Motrin, it is usually $7-8 cheaper. Both work the same and last 8 hours as Tylenol only lasts 4 hours.

Josie - posted on 04/01/2010

You are not alone. My son just turned 9 months and he also wakes up every night to eat. He is also still breastfed. On the nights I work he will only wake up once and goes right back to sleep after his bottle, but on the nights I am home he will wake up several times and does not want to go back to his crib. Not sure how to make it better, but if you figure it out please share. Good luck.

Cheyenne - posted on 04/01/2010

What sort of teething tablets do you use? And do you use normal Children's Motrin. I usually use tylenol and with that, it doesnt help him sleep all night. He's usually up 4 hours later

Amber - posted on 04/01/2010

When I took my daughter in for her 6 month appointment, the doctor asked me how she was going to sleep at night. I sheepishly admitted to rocking her every night, as well as rocking her to get her down for a nap. At that point, my daughter was a very light sleeper, for naps during the day it was very rare that she would sleep without being held and at night she was up at least once crying. My pediatrician told me that unless I wanted to rock her forever, I had to stop now. So I did. And that has made all the difference with my daughter. I know I posted this for someone else, but literally after 3 nights of screaming herself to sleep...she went down the 4th night with very little fussing and then the 5th night we had NOTHING. She went right down and she didn't wake up till 6am. I of course didn't sleep that well that night because I was used to hearing her or getting up with her, but she slept soundly through the night. Maybe your son has issues soothing himself back to sleep in the middle of the night, so he has to learn. Teething is also a possibility..that's been the only time recently that we've had issues with her sleeping and she's now working on tooth number 4. If he's teething, the only thing I've found to work is giving her motrin about a half hour before bedtime. That gives it enough time to kick in and then she's out. The teething tablets I found work during the day but at night the only solution we've found is motrin.

Cheyenne - posted on 04/01/2010

BUT... if anyone knows some "secret" that we are all missing.... PLEASE share!

Cheyenne - posted on 04/01/2010

I think he might be teething, that is a possibility. He has been drooling quite a bit lately. I have alost tried to give him a sippy cup and he wont drink breastmilk in that either... whole milk he will.
Everyone tells me different things to do too and I try them all. My doctor just told me today that when he is ready, he will start sleeping all night, and there really isnt't anything that will make him. BOO!! I guess its just me wanting him to grow up too quick.

Franchesca - posted on 04/01/2010

I don't know if it helps, but my 8 month old daughter sleeps in the same room as her older sister (12). She will wake up to eat, and because I'm so cognizant that she might wake up the other daughter, I wake up before she's screaming (usually) and can pick her up to nurse her. I am not willing to keep her from eating at night because she still has some growing to do. But when things change, you change with it. Also, maybe you can try a sippy cup. My friend has gotten her son to take breastmilk in a sippy cup and it works great.

Teghan - posted on 03/31/2010

My son is the same way. He is 8 months and is up every 2 hours most nights. I nurse him every time he wakes because that is the only thing that will get him back to sleep. I am not a fan of letting him cry it out. I let him fuss, but once it turns to a cry I get him. He eats 3 meals a day and I nurse after meals and at night. Is your son teething? I know mine is so I can't help but to feel bad for him. Everybody has been telling me to do different things to get him to sleep through the night since he was just a couple months old and nothing has really worked. I am beginning to feel that when he is ready to sleep through the night he will. I know this isn't much help, but I thought I would let you know that you are not alone...and if you figure something out PLZ PLZ PLZ let me know! Good luck :)

Cheyenne - posted on 03/31/2010

Thanks Amber for responding.
Yes he has been eating solid foods for a while now also.
He ususally starts to get tired around 7 pm or so. His routine consists of:
I give him cereal and fruits after supper (around 7)
Then I will get him in his pajamas and change his diaper, I give him a bottle of milk but he usually wont drink the whole thing. He only drinks about 4 oz. and then once 7:30 or 7:45 rolls around I will nurse him to get him to sleep.
I do try letting him cry and fuss it out but he hardly ever falls back to sleep on his own.

Amber - posted on 03/31/2010

I would assume he is probably eating solid foods at almost 9 months right? I would try giving him some rice cereal or plain oatmeal just before bed. I know when my daughter was about 3 months we started giving her rice cereal and it would get her to sleep for longer stretches. Now, my daughter is 8 months old and is sleeping anywhere from 9-11 hours through the night. In fact, I haven't had to get up to feed her in the middle of the night since she was about 5 months old. He may not even be hungry when he wakes up in the middle of the night, but because he smells you he is ready to eat. Have you tried just letting him cry it out when he wakes up at night? And how is he put to bed every night?