Is it ok for my 23 months old baby to sleep in our bed?

Jessica - posted on 06/28/2011

I have a 23 month old daughter and a 7 1/2 month baby girl. Both of them sleep with us and we love it. Of course we can't have our alone time but we had enough of that for 8 years LOL! Hey you can always sneek away to the other room when they sleep right? :) I feel having them sleep in another room other than mine would just keep me up and checking on them. Right now I know they are safe being in the same bed with us. Maybe I just watch to many lifetime movies haha...

Shy - posted on 06/24/2011

I have a 2 and a 4 year old (and one on the way) and they spend A LOT of time in mommy and daddy's bed. It doesn't bother me ... it does however bother the hubby because that's our real only "alone time." My response is well we had enough of that to get pregnant again LOL. I have noticed though that when I stick to a more strict night time routine the boys are more likely to not only stay in their own beds but WANT to stay there too, which is a big deal to me. But don't feel bad hun ... your bed, your rules. Good luck! :)

Adèle - posted on 06/24/2011

Dear Jazmin,

Of course this is affecting intimacy with my husband, maybe that is why I am a little uncomfortable with the idea.lol. However, I feel terrible at the thought of kicking him out just to cuddle with my husband. I love him sleeping with us but then again... and actually, no one's mentioned the husband part. How do you all ladies manage that?

Jazmin - posted on 06/22/2011

i'm impressed with all the opinions. I personally believe that the baby should sleep in her own bed. Your bed is the space for you and your husband. I'm curious: isn't this affecting your intimacy w/ your husband?

Aylin - posted on 06/20/2011

I was afraid of smothering my son so I set up a routine for him from day one. He always slept in his own co-sleeper then crib now toddler bed but always in my room so when woke up he saw me and was comforted knowing I was in the same room. Now that he is in his toddler bed he wakes up every morning and climbs into my bed to get his morning kisses and cuddles. This is what worked for me and what I was comfortable with. You have to do what feels right for you.

LaWanda - posted on 06/18/2011

It is all your decision! Our son 23months shares right now but as we have talked about it we think he is about ready for his own bed.

Christie - posted on 06/16/2011

My 23 month old still sleeps in my bed. I feel she will grow out of it in her own time. However, I'm a single Mum with no interest in dating at this time, so I think it may be easier in my situation...

Sometimes I wish I could just have my bed to myself, but after just 1 hour of bed without her next to me doesnt feel right and eventually, she wakes and cries for me... I do worry that she'll wake and try and come searching for me in the dark and injure herself, so in a way I'm glad she co sleeps..

Do what you feel is right, you know whats best and whats comfortable for you.

Samantha - posted on 06/14/2011

I dont see anything wrong with it i personally have the rule that my daughter has to fall asleep in her own bed but she usually wakes up around 6am and jumps in bed with me. when she was younger and breastfeeding she was aloud to fall asleep with me and i would move her into her crib.

Adèle - posted on 06/13/2011

Thanx Ladies, you have all been so helpful!

Wendy - posted on 06/12/2011

my daughter sleeps in her bed untill she wakes up in the mornng. she then comes in bed with us and goes back to sleep for at least 3 hours and I love it more time for me to sleep :)

Susan - posted on 06/12/2011

My little girl slept mostly in her cot on her own, and if she woke we would sometimes lie down on the bed in her room together, we couldn't sleep with her for ages because she just wanted to play or we got in her way when she rolled around (and kicked us to pieces) She is 23 months now and moved to a big bed about 2 months ago, I have to lie with her to go to sleep (she used to go happily on her own) and when she wakes i just crawl backinto her bed with her. We sometimes have whole nights together and sometimes she does just fine on her own. I love our cuddles together and often I think i should be enforcing the separation at night time but probably more because that is what people think we should be doing rather than what we want to be doing. I figure when she is ready to sleep through she will do so and I won't have to crawl into bed with her in the wee hours of the night. Everything is a milestone. She asks to go to bed and has a healthy routine so I see no harm in sleeping with her. I also agree that the security she has from us always being there for her gives her more independence because she knows she can always come back for reassurance if she needs it. Enjoy every minute, i believe they will all get there in their own time

Katrina - posted on 06/11/2011

I don't think there's anything wrong with it.... my 22 month old still sleeps with us, along with our 5 year old. It works better for us. When they are ready they can sleep in their own bed or room, but I'll let them decide when its time. As far as independence, my oldest is the most independent kid ever. I feel that the security that he gets from us at night and all day really, is what allows him to be so independent. Ultimately, you have to do what you feel is best and what works for your family.

Janet - posted on 06/10/2011

I am of the firm belief that if you as a family unit are ALL happy with the sleeping situation then that is the best for your family. I cannot co-sleep. Not because I think it's weird or wrong, but mostly I am afraid of smothering my child and I really, really need my space when I sleep. So for our family it would never work, but from the sounds of it you are all fine with it, then there is no harm :)

Jenelle - posted on 06/10/2011

I agree with the other ladies. If everyone is comfortable with it then there is no problem. I sometimes wish my daughter could sleep with me but she sees my bed as a play area and would never go to sleep. Try to enjoy the time that your little one wants to cuddle with you because you will miss it he no longer wants to sleep with you.

Adèle - posted on 06/10/2011

Thanx ladies! I love my son sleeping with us but my main worry was the effect it might have on him and his sense of independence!But I guess you're all right! And when that time comes, he'll go to his own bed by himself!Thanks for your replies!

Xandria - posted on 06/09/2011

My daughter sleeps with me. I don't think anything about it. But if you don't like it then start putting him in his own bed. It really is about what you feel comfortable with.

Vicki - posted on 06/09/2011

It's your decision. There's nothing wrong with it. Our little man sleeps with us and we're happy with that. I'm kinda looking forward to when he's not there but I think the benefits outweigh the negatives.

We are just coming into winter here so I'm not going to change anything for a few months. In summer I'll start putting him to bed in his own room (single bed) with the understanding that when he wakes he's always welcome to join us. I'll appreciate having a few hours sleep without him but happy to take it slowly. We are still breastfeeding, I prefer to have him there so I never have to get up!

There are a lot of opinions out there, but go with your gut.