Temper Tantrums

Aimee - posted on 09/20/2010

oh yea,im exatly the same,i think my 14 month old son is hitting the terrible twos early!i read somewhere that toddlers get frustrated because they cant explain and express themselves so when my son starts one i sit him down look him in the eye and try and help him express how hes feeling,i say i know you wan t to touch that but its naughty and mummy doesnt want you touching it,he screams but i just persist and after iv said whats needed i walk of pick up ome of his toys and go wow look at these,try and distract him mid wobbler,it works for me,sometime i even get him to say sorry1good luck,ino its hard!

Tonya - posted on 09/18/2010

Ashlyn is also doing the tmpet tantrums we jsut let her cry it out she dont cry all that long she does her thing and then gets over it but i do know were you are comming from

Wajiha - posted on 09/14/2010

My 13 month old starts shouting and screaming if she gets irritated at someone or throws a tantrum if she wants something or wants to do something and is stopped. Hopefully its just a phase and she'll grow out of it. Till then, the best way to handle is to keep her in an environment where she does not have to told no alot and she can do whatever she wants without being stopped a lot.

Brittany - posted on 09/08/2010

My 13 mo. Old does the same thing. Ill be fixing her sister hair and she'll come running towards us and just sit down and throw her self back and hit her head. I usually let her cry it out, but I've also had to put her in her highchair so she would hurt her head

Brittany - posted on 09/08/2010

My 13 mo. Old does the same thing. Ill be fixing her sister hair and she'll come running towards us and just sit down and throw her self back and hit her head. I usually let her cry it out, but I've also had to put her in her highchair so she would hurt her head

Heather - posted on 09/07/2010

In the middle of the night it sounds like he is having bad dreams, not temper tantrums. Most children start waking up once or twice a night around 12 months old from bad dreams. The best thing at night is to try to get them to wake up and make them realize that everything is ok. Sometimes taking them into another room can help to wake him up. Also, he could be waking to nurse or to drink some milk or formula. My 13 month old still wakes in the middle of the night to nurse and for comfort. My son did this until he was 16 months old. What your son is doing sounds completely normal. Try changing his diaper and then holding him and cuddling him. He needs his mommy when he wakes up scared. If he seems to upset, take him into the living room and put on a cartoon for 15 to 30 minutes, and then make sure to tell him that he has to go back to bed now. Most of the time, they will go happily. Good luck. I hope this helps. Your 13 month old is still your baby.

Dale - posted on 09/07/2010

Gotta admit I'm not big on tantrums so I'm not a follower of the let them cry it out or ignore them platforms (right, like that works). With all my daughter's brothers they were given the opportunity for a single tantrum each (I think only two took me up on the offer as one wisely learnt from his twin). I don't promote any certain method as I have only dealt with two real full on tantrums my whole parenting life and one of those was in a supermarket where I asked a young male aisle person to get me a shallow bucket of water (he perhaps mistakingly thought my child had had an accident), and I very calmly poured it on my darling's head (was really barely a splash). He blinked once heavily, I asked him if he was ready to leave, he nodded as cool as a cucumber and I took his hand and we left leaving behind a full trolley of groceries to be re-done later. I guess my immediate reaction would be to nip it in the bud the very first time a tantrum raised its head...and as each one has its own triggers and location, you pretty much have to think on your feet or stand there cringing.

Christie - posted on 09/07/2010

I don't know if anyone else has mentioned this, as I havent read all of the posts on this thread. But it could be night terrors, due to the waking in the middle of the night and screaming. This is usually when they begin. Talk to your doctor about this possibility, and be careful with what you allow on the television when your little one is in the room. We leave Disney on while my daughter is in the livingroom. Loud sounds and frightening images can cause these night terrors.

Crystal - posted on 09/07/2010

My son has been doing this for a couple weeks now. He even goes as far as when I tell him no he will straight look at me and scream. I just look at him like is is silly and tell him it's ok that he is mad, but Mommy isn't going to hold him or talk to him until he calms down. He does another loud scream and realizes I'm not paying attention to him and he stops.

Kassie - posted on 09/06/2010

it jjust seeking attention its annoying lol and yes i do the same thing sometimes just put him in bed and hell cry for a bit at the door then when i go back he most time uisually bit bettter

Katy - posted on 09/05/2010

It's so comforting to know that it is not just my son who is acting like Damien from the Omen! I have really been struggling, esp. since I still have post natal depression. I was beggining to think I was a hopeless mother.

Most of the time he is totally adorable, loving and kind. Then he throws these tantrums which are just awful, even my new childminder was shocked at his behaviour! (He woke up the next door neighbours baby as he's so loud crying!)

We have started working together on the discipline, telling him "no" then putting him on the sofa for 1 minute whilst not looking at him or giving him attention. He has been getting better recently. I have also starting making sure that I praise him for good behaviour. I frown when he's about to/does something naughty so I understands I am not happy.

It's small steps but we are getting there. I will also be using some of the suggestions other people have mentioned.

Good luck to all you mums, lets pray for our children's tantrums to end (well minimize at least! lol) xxx

Danielle - posted on 09/04/2010

MY DAUGHTER IS DOING THE SAME THING, SHE WILL BE 14 MONTHS IN TWO WEEKS

Aris - posted on 09/04/2010

Mine started doing this at 12 months old... He can be completely happy one minute, and then the next minute, just yelling... It's kinda irritating. lol And he's not really crying when he has these fits, it just seems like he wants the attention. I thought they were supposed to start doing that when they were a lil older, but not mine!! Sometimes I just put him in his bed and let him cry it out... My friend told me the same thing. Just walk away. Usually if he doesn't fall asleep, I come back to his crib and he is pretty happy to see me, and in a better mood...

Kassie - posted on 09/03/2010

My 13 month old son will crack a tantrem if i tell him off for been naughty or if he doesnt want to eat he will crack it or if you hold him when he doesnt wanna he will cry arch his back like uve smacked him im trying to ignore it so he dont do it for attention but sometimes he will headbut ther floor but that one of his tired sign too

Anna - posted on 09/03/2010

My Tristan has started doing this too. What I do now is first give him verbal warning. I tell him if he doesnt stop then I will put him in his bed. Sometimes he stops sometimes he doesnt. When he doesnt I take him up to his crib and walk away. I check on him every 5 min by listening at the door. When he stops screaming I go in and get him. If I keep it up he will understand I wont tolerate this kind of behavior. I know it works too because I have 3 older ones and that is exactly what worked with them. Good luck in what ever it is you try to do! Like everything else this too will pass

Rachel - posted on 09/03/2010

MY LITTLE MAN IS 14 MONTHS OLD AND THE LAST TWO MONTHS IVE NOTICED A CHANGGE IN HIM WITTH TANTRUMS TOO. NOT SOOOO MUCH AS THROUGH THE NIGHTT AS HE SLEEPS RIGHT THROUGH THANK GOD, BUT THE LIKES OF WHEN I LIE HIM DOWN TO CHANGE HIS NAPPY (DIAPER) HE GOES COMLETELY MAD LIKE JACKLE AND HIDE AND THE OTHER REALLY BAD TEMPER HE HAS IS WHHEN HE IS FINISHED FOOD, EVEN HALF WAY THROUGH HE GOES INTO HYSTERICS AS HE KNOWS HIS BREAKY IS GOING TO FINISH SOON BUT IT CAN BE REALLY HARD AT TIMES. SUPPOSE THERE GOING THROUGH ALL THESE LITTLE STAGES N CHANGES AND UNTIL THEY CAN TELL US (WHICH WONT BE TOO LONG) WE LL JUST HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IT, BUT TO LET U KNOW, IT COULD BE A LOT WORSE :) IT WILL EASE OFF AND THEN ONTO A DIFFERENT OBSTACLE , OH THE JOYS .. CHIN UP.. WE LL BE LAUGHING ABOUT THIS IN A YEAR OR TWO XX XX

Rebecca - posted on 09/01/2010

My little girl has started with the tantrums now for about a month (She's a little over 13 months). She just had the biggest one this last week. We took the recycling away from her because she would have hurt herself on the sharp edges. She had a full out fit and screamed non-stop in the starfish position on the floor for a half hour. We thought it was a bit funny at first because she's so overdramatic. We even filmed a bit of it on the ole Blackberry. We decided it was probably best to just leave her in her play area safe and sound. Then we went into the other room to let her settle down. She really didn't settle. So I called my mother and asked her what the best tactic was. She said that as long as I wasn't giving her what she wanted (the recycling) that going in and comforting her wasn't giving in to the tantrum. She said that we did the right thing leaving her to try to soothe herself but that after 15 minutes or so a child of my daughters age probably didn't even remember what they were upset about. So, I went in, gave her a drink of water and she stopped right away. I don't think that would have happened immediately though. Giving them a bit of time to soothe themselves in a safe place like the crib, or their room/playspace can give them the opportunity to learn how to self soothe. However, as my mom points out, after awhile if it doesn't happen and you aren't giving them the forbidden thing they want, you can go and soothe.

However, I think another woman mentioned the acid reflux thing due to the timing of the fit. I had a woman in my mommy group who had a similar problem and the baby ended up having acid reflux too. I'd eliminate any medical problems first too, just to make sure.

Crazy our kids are getting so big.

Kylene - posted on 09/01/2010

My daughter is just starting to scream for no reason. We are pretty sure she is picking it up from our neighbor because he is quite the screamer. So whenever she does this I try to distract her. I will start asking her questions like whats wrong? I tell her to use her words cause mommy can't understand why she is crying. Or I will distract her with something to do. Like lets go clean your room!!! So far it has been working but I loved reading everyone elses ways of coping with this horrible racket lol. Once my remedy starts to not work anymore I am going to try some other people's ideas.

Vicki - posted on 08/31/2010

Only a couple of times, when he was really really tired. He wanted the clock radio and totally flipped when I wouldn't let him have it. I don't leave because I think it must be scary for little ones having all that emotion explode out of them and not being able to control it. I just held him and let him know I was there for him (but didn't let him have the radio of course).

Michelle - posted on 08/31/2010

I have to do the same as Morgan. My son wont calm down if I leave him alone. I tried that when he first started throwing tantrums cuz he was hitting and biting me too, but it just made things worse. So now I sit on the floor with him where if he flings himself out of my arms he wont fall far and I hold him real close telling him its ok and that we can fix whatever hes upset about when he calms down. It takes forever sometimes but it always works.

Lovely - posted on 08/31/2010

Im having that same issue and need some suggestions to I Need Help!!!!

Laura - posted on 08/31/2010

My 13 month old throws tantrums, too. When he's mad I act mad right along with him and tell him how mad he is and what made him so mad. Or when he's sad I act sad too and tell him how sad he is and tell him why he's sad, maybe because he wants something he can't play with. They don't know the emotions they're feeling so you have to tell them what they're feeling and it helps if they see you being mad or sad right along with them.

Leah - posted on 08/31/2010

This makes me feel better. My son didn't start tantrums until about 18 months, and I was worried that there was something wrong with my daughter. She will collapse on the floor in a hysterical fit! I think she is just frustrated that she can't communicate better! She is trying so hard to talk, and gets very upset when I can't figure out what she wants. I am hoping it will resolve itself once she can talk more!

Bernadette - posted on 08/30/2010

just because you can't immediately see the reason for the tantrum, doesn't mean that it's over nothing. My daughter sometimes gets upset, and I cannot find any reason for it. That doesn't mean the reason it not there though - it could be something like feeling unwell. Not all illnesses are indicated by a high temperature or anything obvious like that - I have worked out that sometimes when my daughter acts like this, it's actually that she is trying to poo but can't. I finally worked it out as she is now able to tell me when she has done a poo or wants her nappy changed. One day she kept screaming Poo Poo, Nappy change! And kept pulling at her nappy. When I looked, she had no poo but was groaning a lot so I worked out she needed some laxatives. Sure enough, the next day was a very solid one in her nappy. The only reason I worked it out was because she is very well-spoken for her age, and is starting to be able to tell me. And the last few days she has been very grumpy and again I couldn't see any reason for it. Then yesterday, I suddenly noticed that she had an entire new molar through that I didn't even know had started to come through. I brush her teeth every night, but she makes it very difficult for me to see in her mouth as she covers the bottom ones with her tongue. I had no idea, as she didn't let me know, she just acted grumpy.

Sometimes when she is throwing tantrums, and I can't find a reason, I'll just try various things like giving her teething tablets, or even panadol in case she is any pain that she can't tell me about. I figure that panadol is not going to hurt if it turns out she doesn't need it, so I give it just in case. And often, it works.

It's very hard at that age, because the only way they can tell you something is wrong is to scream about it - they can't tell you what the problem is. However, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be for no reason - you just have to try different things until you find the reason.

Naomi - posted on 08/30/2010

my little girl is the same its horrible she even head butts the floor she screams so loud

Liz - posted on 08/30/2010

I noticed you said even in the middle of the night, which makes me think it not temper. If the crying starts after you move the baby away from something they can't have, or say no no, that is temper. Screaming for nothing could be acid reflux especially if they are waking up in the night. My little one would wake up from sleep crying and throw himself backwards after eating, or even when nursing. He was on meds for it which calmed down the burning and nasty taste coming up in his throat. Writing down what you are observing and talk to your doctor.

Charlotte - posted on 08/30/2010

When my older child tryed the kicking and screaming I placed her in her crib where I knew she was safe and just waited for her to stop to show her the fit was not going to get her way than after she was done I want and got her out than talked to her after a few fits it just ended.

Colleen - posted on 08/28/2010

I don't know the situations you are dealing with. With my daughter when she starts throwing fits its because she is tired or her teeth are bothering her. THANK GOD a nap and or some motrin and orajel have fixed the problem (knock on wood)

Melany - posted on 08/28/2010

My son is doing the same thing and it is driving me crazy! If he doesn't get his way, he flails himself backwards and screams! He also has done it at night/ when he has woken up! I have no idea what to do, but my sister suggested walking away from him, which I will start trying, especially when I know he won't bust his head open! I am scared at what he will be like when he is 2 or 3 when he is already doing this! Good luck to you and make sure you let us know if you find a good solution!

Katie - posted on 08/25/2010

yeah the only thing that seemed to help was looking at her (making sure she saw me) like she was acting strange... you know how you used to look at your parents when you were a teen...lol like what's you're problem. it took a while but she's mostly over it now.