too early

Debra - posted on 10/02/2010

It really is a question only you can answer. My daughter is 15mths and I would die if I fell pregnant now. I wouldn't be able to handle it. We're not even sure if we want a second. My pregnancy was horrible and I found the first few months of my daughter's life extremely challenging. If we do have a second, it will be when our daughter is at least 3 so she's not so dependant on me and I get to enjoy her for longer. but everyone is different.

Maria - posted on 10/01/2010

I had my first child (a boy) in September 2002 and my second (a girl) in November 2004, and now the last and third one (a boy) in July 2009. My two first ones are so close, almost as twins. They have so much fun playing together. I can recommend having them close. It is so easy doing stuff with them like go swimming, biking, bowling etc since they can do almost the same things even though they are not the exact same age. I read once what a really wise person wrote "Seeing the difficulties and the trouble of having another child is being mature enough for it. Realizing that there will be more work and that it can be hard is a prof of that you will manage it a lot better then the parents thinking that there will no problems at all.The parents worrying are less likely to get a post postpartum depression".

Mary - posted on 09/30/2010

My little girl turns 15 months tomorrow. I am currently pregnant with our second and due in January. We wanted them a little close together so we wouldn't get used to not changing diapers and then having to start all over again! lol If you both want another baby and you think you are ready, go for it!

Leanne - posted on 09/30/2010

my little man is 15months and due number 2 on 1st January 2010..... im abit worried about coping but if you fall preg i think its a blessing and it waould happen if you wasnt ready x

Geradin - posted on 09/30/2010

i have a 14 month old and a 4 month old....my oldest son was about 4 months when i found out i was 3 months pregnant....i wasnt ready for another baby.....but now that i have them both im really happy....but if ur not ready for another baby u should talk it over with ur husband.

Hayley - posted on 09/29/2010

i love that theres so many other mums out there with the same perspective on this as me. I also have a 14 month old and are going to aim to get pregnant in January so our first is 2 years old when #2 arrives. I think it is the perfect age that they will start to understand the meaning of sharing and are at their independant stage so will happily go play by themselves while you are busy with the baby, then when baby is settled then bonding time with oldest one is essential. At that age they will also love to help out with the nappy changing, bathing, dressing etc. My step-daughter (who only stays once a fortnight) was 2 when my first was born and she was a great help. I personaly think the closer the better. Good luck, i'm sure you will be fine.

Keri - posted on 09/29/2010

My babies are 11 months apart and I love it! They are so close and are best friends. Right now they are 15 months and 26 months. They fight a little bit but not bad. We wanted them close in age and I wouldn't change it for the world! I say if you're ready go for it!

Stephanie - posted on 09/29/2010

all i can say is don't have one unless you're absolutely ready to make another addition to your family. I have a 14 month old and I feel its too early because i think kids that age really need one on one time with their parents...and i feel if they don't get that because of a new baby they'll act out more...but really its just a matter of what you feel ready for, and if you're not, then just wait a little longer, there's no need to rush!

Sara - posted on 09/28/2010

I have a 14 month old daughter and am currently 2 months pregnant with number 3. My other daughter is 6. I liked the 5 year gap between the first 2 but sometimes i think it was a bit much. I know this one is going to be more difficult with a 21 month gap but like the other moms said I know they will play together!

Mel - posted on 09/28/2010

i have also been thinking about it, and i have be thinking i will see what happens from december onwards, only because i need an operation in a few weeks and want time to be able to heal from that then in december i think be nice to go from there and see what happens

Dionysius - posted on 09/28/2010

i actually got pregnant when my son was 8 months (im now 6mos preggo and hes 14mos). sometimes i think it may be too soon because my son might get jealous but no matter what there will be jealousy between siblings. i kind of think its a good thing they arent too far apart. that way they always have somene their own age around. it is hard chasing a baby being pregnant but like everyone else says, only if you're ready

Roxanne - posted on 09/27/2010

I have a 18 year old,15 year old and a 14 month old and now i want another so lil man doesnt come up alone. I think it is a great time to start. LOL the 3 yr gap in first 2 boys was great but the 14 year gap well made things different but wouldnt change it for the world. my lil man is my life. And now we want another so he isnt so lonely.

Kim - posted on 09/27/2010

My boys are 21 months apart. I got pregnant just after he turned 1. It is challenging at times since they are 14 months and almost 3. The little one wants to do everything the older one does. But I think they will grow up to be best buds.

Reana - posted on 09/26/2010

thanks heaps i've have thought about it alot and im thinking we might start trying at the end of the yr so my lil girls around 2-1/2 by the time i have the 2nd.so thank u again everyone.

Lexi - posted on 09/26/2010

I think it's fine whenever you feel ready and whenever your doctor says your body is ready. I am wanting to start trying for another now too by my husband doesn't want to yet. My mom got pregnant with my brother when I was 9 months old. She loved how close together we were even tho it was hard. When my son turned 9 months I told her she was insane! lol I think it's really just different for every person.

Beth - posted on 09/25/2010

I have a 14 month old and am 8 weeks pregnant. I think it is different for every person...if you feel ready to handle another kid then absolutely! 2 years apart is a great age spread for the children. My sister had her children 20 months apart, and my mother in law had my husband and his brother 16 months apart, and both have said of course it is hard in the first few months adjusting, but down the road, it is so worth it...the kids are close enough in age to be friends, and by the time the oldest is walking, that makes it much easier to go ahead and try for the second :)

Jennifer - posted on 09/25/2010

my daughter is 14 months and in november i'm due to have a lil boy... we had ours really close, but being military and my husband missing on alot of her 1sts he begged me to have another, and i am just as excited for my lil man as i was for my daughter.. i dont think i would have it any other way!

Terrill - posted on 09/24/2010

My son will be 14 months at the end of September and I am currently 30 weeks pregnant with number 2. We wanted them to be fairly close in age, also I wanted to have them close together personally as I am 33 and did not want to wait til I was over 35 to have more children. It was a personal decision and a few of my friends are trying decide what they want their age gap to be as well. I also like the idea of having all the sleepless nights over with in one go rather than spacing them out over a few years! Good luck with your decision:)

Lauren - posted on 09/24/2010

my son is also 14 months and were are also considering trying for baby no2 after Christmas, as much as i would love another one i do have my doubts, mainly i feel guilty that i should be focusing on my first and enjoying him for as long as i can. During my first pregnancy i was anemic, i had no energy to do anything and i would hate that to happen again as it would have an effect on my son. i think maybe the ideal time to have another baby is when my son is 3 and can attend pre-school, that way he will have something to keep him occupied and i will have time when i can get some rest.

Tammy - posted on 09/24/2010

I agree, its a very personal decision- if you arent ready, wait a little longer. Tell your other half that you still want to spend a bit more time with you little girl before you get pregnant. Even a few more months can make a big difference to how you will feel. Personally, my hubby and I would like a two year age gap so we are very close to start trying for baby #2

Tia - posted on 09/23/2010

My oldest was about 6 months old when I found out I was pregnant with her little sister. It wasn't planned at all but I'm glad it happened that way. They ended up being not quite 15 months apart and they are such good friends. Having 2 close together isn't all that bad. Looking back on it now it was actually pretty easy. It's 3 you need to give some real thought to. That's when you're outnumbered and it get's kinda crazy. My son came along 20 months later and turned my world upside-down. I love him and he's a joy and he gets along great with his sisters but I am one tired mama. One in preschool, one in her terrible 2s and at the tail end of potty training, and one falling over into anything and everything that could split his head open. I think your both thinking it's time for another you're probably right.

Jill - posted on 09/23/2010

I have a 14 month old and a four week old. We haven't had any jealousy issues, in fact my 14 month old is always trying to share his toys with his little brother. The most difficult thing is that he doesn't understand that flinging toys at him can hurt him! It can be overwhelming at times when both babies are needing your attention and you don't feel like you have enough arms!! They are so great though, and I can't wait until they are old enough to play together.

Rachael - posted on 09/23/2010

My son will be 14 months on the 30th and my daughter will be 6 on October 14th and I love having them spaced out, she is such a big help for me and they aboslutely love each other. Me and my younger brother are 19 months apart and didnt really like eachother until my Sr, his Jr year in HS. We are not planning on having another one but I think if you are ready go for it. It makes a big difference on what the kids are like too, some can be far apart and be the bestest friends or they can be close and hate each other or vise versa...

Nykee - posted on 09/22/2010

Mine are one year and twenty days apart, and there are challenges, but I love it this way. They're already getting to be very close and protective of each other. I think there are pros and cons to having them close together and further apart. It just depends on what you're comfortable with.

Krissy - posted on 09/22/2010

i had two miscarrages inbetween my 2 so they ended up being 3/1/2 yrs apart by boy has issues but he loves his little sister so much always wanting to play with her and helping her etc... from day one he loved her. sh on the other hand altho she loves her brother she gets over loved and gets a bit agro witrh it. ifmy 1st pregnancy survived they would have been 2/1/2 yrs appart. i know some one who had her two about 18 months appart and she told me it was the most difficult thing ever but now as they have grown it is easier, good luck only do it if you feel you want to dont give into your husband let him know if your not ready or sure...........

Sara - posted on 09/22/2010

My son turned 14 mos last Friday & Im 20 wks preg now. Everyone tells me its going to be soo hard having em so close, but I think it will be harder if they are farther apart. This way they can be friends. But if your not ready, then dont rush into it.

Heather - posted on 09/22/2010

It's not to early. Mine are 14 months apart. Yours will be further apart. But little girls are very helpful. My son wasn't. He was still my baby. So basically, I had 2 babies to take care of. It's a lot of work, but it's also a lot of fun! But then to, you won't get to spend as much time with your baby girl. It sounds to me like your not ready to be pregnant again.

Veronica - posted on 09/22/2010

I found out I was pregnant with no.2 on No.1's first birthday we planned to start trying and it happened straight away so they ended up only 20 months apart, to be honest I thought it was great! When bub no.2 came along my first was still having a day time nap so I would always manage to get them down together and either have a nap too or get stuff done. Then I have a 3 1/2 year gap to no.3 which I found harder (sleep and rest wise), then I have 2 1/2 years to no.4 which was fine too.
To be honest I think when it's going from no.1 to no.2 a small gap is really good, it's when you have more that it gets harder and the gap matters more.
I say if you are both feeling ready just go for it, before you know it your life will be filled with another little miracle! Good luck.

Jennifer - posted on 09/21/2010

my 3 yr old was 18months when we started trying again! i wish i would have waited a lil bit longer only because my lil one terrible twos kicked in the moment i got pregnant and all i wanted to do was sleep but no i was only on my feet it was the hardest pregnancy ever! now my kids are 3 yrs and 1 yr old and they are always fighting with each other i guess thats what brothers do!!

Larra - posted on 09/21/2010

Good Luck Frenika...My daughter also turned 14 months on the 13th, and were also working on baby nubmer two...Weird, i think but anyways I couldnt help but smile when i read your post =-)

Frenika - posted on 09/21/2010

My son turned 14 months on the 13th and baby number 2 is in the works..lol
It depends on how you feel on a daily basis. If you generally feel overwhelmed and constantly wanting a break or change then a second baby might not be a good idea just yet. Every soon-to-be-big bro/sis adjusts differently, but the transition will be smoother if your lil one still feels loved and important even if new baby stuff starts to arrive.

Larra - posted on 09/21/2010

O my this is rather neat how my little girl is also 14 months old and my husband is ready for another child...I have asked the same question over and over..I really want another baby but only having only one i have no clue what two babie (a newborn and a then 2 year old) would be like......I think having them close would be so great....Soooo We've decide to start tryin again....Good Luck on your decision, i know its hard but go with your heart =-)

Amanda - posted on 09/21/2010

I have another one and my 14 month old loves his little brother...He gives him hugs and kisses all the time..Its like he thinks his brother is his baby.

But like others have said you aren't ready if you don't feel like you should. Its definitely difficult with two babies, but I wouldn't have changed my decision. I wanted them to be close in age.

Lindsey - posted on 09/20/2010

My son is the same age and My husband and I are actually wanting another baby also! I think having them close together is a good thing. My brother is 8 years older and I know I always wished I had someone younger to play with. lol but good luck!

Genia - posted on 09/20/2010

it really depends on your temperament, your child's temperament, and the next baby's temperament. For me, my two boys are 2.5 years apart, then when boy #2 was almost 5 I had my girl. The almost 5 year age gap was SOOOOO much better than the 2.5 year. Both boys were high needs, difficult babies and toddlers. So trying to take care of one when the other was also really needing me was extremely difficult. Plus, I have a hard time with the whole lack of sleep thing and extreme pregnancy exhaustion, which made more a very grumpy mommy of a 2 yo. And for those that want their kids to be friends...yeah, my boys play together well sometimes, but they are at each other throats just as much, if not more. I would gladly trade their on-again-off-again friendship for the caring love the boys have for their little sister. HTH!

Saundra - posted on 09/20/2010

We're getting ready to work on #2 as well and our boy turned 14 months last Thursday. It's only too soon if you aren't ready...