Has anyone had any experiences with losing a child??

Emma - posted on 10/19/2009

I have not experienced a loss but I think your story is very touching and I was very inspired by your wonderful replies. Keep your babies memory alive with a keepsake box that you can share with your daughter when she is older. I know that grief can be a long process and I can only begin to imagine your pain.
I hope you have found comfort from the replies. Take care xxx

Stacy - posted on 10/17/2009

Time will help, but it will always hurt a bit. My son died a few minutes before he was born. That was 18 years ago and though the pain is not sharp, there are remnants still. You love your child and you will grieve. Please get in touch with a support group in your area or online. It really does help. A good one online is www.healingheart.net Hang in there. Your daughter needs you. Don't try to forget, he is real, and was a part of your life.

Penny - posted on 10/16/2009

I'm sorry for your loss. I recently had a miscarriage and I feel as if that is a loss of a child too. I was okay with the miscarriage but there are still days when I am saddened thinking about how this child would have been growing inside me at this many weeks or wondering how they would have looked or acted when they were here with us.. I was especially upset when I found out my older sister (who I kind of have an estranged relationship with) is pregnant and due at the same time I would have been. It was a horrible blow to me since I know my sister and she could care less for another child. Growing up its funny how all my siblings and I never thought she married or be a mom. In fact she is constantly telling everyone her 2 year old daughter could care less for her. She'd rather go to her dad, grandma, grandpa, aunties and uncles before being with her. Anyway, know it's okay to grieve and be sad. He will always be a part of you.

Jodelle - posted on 10/16/2009

I'm so sorry for your loss. My mother lost a child of SIDS, she was 1 month old. Everyone grieves differently, the important thing is to allow yourself to grieve. I highly reccommend involving yourself in some sort of grief counseling. I'm sure your local hospital could link you in with groups that specialize in this. There is no proper timeframe, don't ever feel guilty for the time it takes you to heal. Good luck.

Jennifer - posted on 10/15/2009

I have a family friend who lost their 3 year-old to a driver on Meth plowing into their car. Gabby was on life support for 3 days before they let her go. Her organs were donated and the family has been in contact with the recipients. Using their grief, they were able to set up a room in our local children's hospital called "Gabe's Room" for families who find themselves having to say good bye too damned soon.

After seeing them struggle through the last two years, myself having a daughter who was only 3 months younger then theirs, my best advice is to use your grief for good. Perhaps set up a yearly donation in his name to a local charity that supports children. Perhaps plant a sapling in your yard that is the right age, and watch it grow.

Unfortunately the pain will always be there, and yes it will get better. There will be days when you barely think about him, and other days where its all you can think about. On those days, give your daughter the biggest hug you can and thank God that she is there.

Remember, she probably feels the lose as much if not more than you. They were closer than any two people can ever be. There will always be a part of him there, you just have to look for it.

God bless, and keep you.

Jennifer - posted on 10/15/2009

Fortunetly I have not lost a child. My heart goes out to you and your family.