Teen Moms

Rocio - posted on 05/10/2010 ( 10 moms have responded )

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I became a teen mom on January 21,2005, at the age of 16. I was 15 when I found out I was pregnant. My boyfriend at the time and I were in love and decided that keeping the baby was what we wanted. I have always been very determined and goal oriented. I was a junior in high school when our son Izeah was born. We made it through together and both graduated on schedule. I was even Vice-president of my class! My husband and I have been together 8 years (13-21) and will be celebrating our first wedding anniversary this May. Since having our son we welcomed a baby girl to our family last June. I know my story sounds like a fairytale, considering the fact that most teen moms don't graduate high school and even fewer remain with the father's of their kids. I just want to say that not all teen moms are irresponsible and or neglectful. What prompted me to write this was, that I was reading a conversation about old fashioned parenting, and one of the moms made a comment about how she "lives in a town where there are a lot of teen mothers and their children are out of control". I really resent that comment. She probably didn't mean anything by it, but the conversation had absolutely nothing to do teen mothers or their children. I just feel like more often than not teen mothers are seen in a negative light. Yes, teen pregnancy is not ideal, and it takes a strong young woman to get the courage to put her kids first over everything, but there are plenty of us who do it everyday and wouldn't change for anything in the world.

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Angela - posted on 02/11/2012

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Well done on being a focussed, successful MARRIED mother of happy, well-cared-for children, and one who first came to motherhood as a teenager. Also well done on not rushing into marriage whilst still a teenager. Very commendable, but I'm sure you're aware you're the exception rather than the rule.



You say you both graduated High School? So before you were earning in order to provide for your child yourselves, who was footing the bill for the financial upkeep of your child? Your parents? Your partner's parents? The taxpayer in the form of welfare benefits?



I'm sure your children are well-looked after, happy, bright and stimulated. However much it may be a happy ever after story now, was it that way from the beginning?



Not quite a fairytale - unless you can tell me that you have provided for your own children all the way along since birth.



And to be honest, I'm sure quite a lot of children born of teenage mothers are normal, happy, well cared for kids. It's not your parenting skills that are being questioned, there are good (and bad) parents of ALL ages. And before you think I'm attacking you, there are parents of all ages who rely on help from funds generated from working people's taxes. It's not an issue exclusive to teenage parents.



But teenagers, more than older parents are the ones who seem to feel the need to justify their decisions by posting to online chat threads.



Little wonder that the next generation of teenagers think it's cool to start having children of their own. Their peers who are just a little older than them are doing a grand job. And the good old taxpayer will foot the bill!

Megan - posted on 07/13/2010

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I was a teen mom, I had my first son at 17. His father and I have been together now for almost 9 years and married for 6 years. I graduated from high school on time, we own our own home and now have 3 beautiful healthy well behaved kids. I'm glad you posted this because there are a lot of stereotypes about teen moms, even now when someone finds out I had Austin at 17 I get "But your such a good mom" so because I was 17 I'm automatically not a good mom? I think the show 17 and pregnant doesn't help, yah there are some good moms on there but more often than not there isn't. My sister was almost 10 years older than me when she had her first child, she's now a single mom who still lives with my parents. Age isn't as big of a factor as maturity and how responsible you are.

Elizabeth - posted on 05/18/2010

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I got married the day before I graduated high school and had my daughter a little over a year later. I think being a mom in general is hard. Wonderful, but hard. I have two other friends who are teen moms, and they do the absolute best that they can with their children. I think the hardest part about being so young & being a mom is finances. Never being able to pay all your bills on time & sometimes not being able to afford groceries can make a person crazy. I think the financial issue tends to be less likely with older moms. But I think the best thing about being a teen mom is that the age gap between parent & child is less. I feel like I will be more likely to remember what it's like to be in junior high & have to go to school with a massive pimple on your forehead or what it's like when your boyfriend dumps you. Even though this is the hardest part of my life so far, I wouldn't give it up for anything. I have a husband that's better to me than some middle-aged husbands are to their wives, and I have a beautiful little girl that makes my world go round.

Tanya - posted on 05/18/2010

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I wasn't a teen mom either, but I was 21, which is still rather young. I have seen really irresponsible moms who are in their thirties and forties and really responsible moms who are very young. It has nothing to do with age! Good for you for being a great mom! God bless!

Amy - posted on 05/18/2010

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I think you're doing a wonderful job as a mother! Age does not determine how well you take care of or love your babies. :-) I wasn't a teen mom, but I was a "young" mom. I was 22 when I got pregnant.

Keep on bein a wonderful mama! :-D

[deleted account]

I am glad you shared your story for two reasons. One, I am very prolife and I always think God gives us only what we can handle, even if it doesn't seem like we can handle it at the time. I think the fact that you were determined to raise your child and go to school is commendable and our media should shed more light on mothers like you. God Bless

CARRIE - posted on 05/17/2010

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I have never been a teen Mom but, I think that raising a child in a good manner doesn't always depend on age. My sister also found out that she was pregnant at 15 and had her son who is now 10 years old and a very well behaved good kid at the age of 16. She is a great Mom and did an awesome job despite all the negativity out there toward teen parents. I felt bad for her because she had to go through a lot of things other women don't have to while she was pregnant. First there were the stares and whispers almost everywhere she went. She is short and has always looked younger than what she is even then, so I think people thought she was even younger than 16 most of the time. Then there were the comments and looks of disapproval from the doctors and nurses at the place where she got prenatal care and the hospital where she delivered. She proved them all wrong in the end by being a good parent and raising a good kid. Life hands us what it hands us. Hopefully we do the best we can and learn from every step we take. I know plenty of parents of all ages who aren't doing a very good job as parents and plenty who are. It takes more then age, money, and a heartbeat to raise a child. Young or old, rich or poor it takes common sense, love, tons of patience, and determination beyond your wildest dreams to be a parent.

Rocio - posted on 05/14/2010

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Thanks for all your positive feed back! Let's continue to be great moms and love our children with all we have.

Samantha - posted on 05/12/2010

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I think maybe she was right, sure there are some teen moms with "out of control" children. But guess what? There are plenty of "older" mothers with children who are "out of control" as well. I don't think it's fair to lump all teen mothers/parents into one group. Would it be fair to do that to any group of people? I don't think so.
Your definatly right, being a teen mother is definatly challenging. I think as a teen mom you become more determined and more dedicated than ever before.
I think moms of all ages need to stop judging other moms and start supporting eachother more!

Congrats to you and your husband! I had my daughter at 18 and I agree with the post before mine. I'm not sure I could have done it when I was in school either!

Kristen - posted on 05/11/2010

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Well done.. kudos to you. I had my son when i was 19 and Im not sure if I could have done it still in school. Keep up the good work, if only there were more teens (who have babies) like you that were responsible enough to realize what it takes to be a good parent!!

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