Trying to get almost 11month old on a bedtime routine

Christina - posted on 05/19/2010 ( 29 moms have responded )

10

16

0

My daughter is almost 11 months old and still fights us on going to bed. She usually goes down between 9 to 10:30. She gets a bottle with rice in it before we put her down. And she usually gets up at least once for a feeding then goes back to sleep for about 2 hours then is up for good. We try to put her down still awake a little but then she gets up and cry's till we pick her back up and rock her to sleep. She even does this for naps(if she takes one). I want her to be able to learn to put herself to sleep and sleep more if possible. Any advice would be good for this first time mom. Thanks.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Ashley - posted on 05/19/2010

75

36

6

It was a nightmare to get my little one to sleep..we tried the cry it out method 4 times(not nights.TIMES) and then finally on the 5th attempt it worked. I put him to bed while he was really really sleepy and just about to sleep. Here is the routine. . It was dinner. . then a bath..lotion. . a bottle...cuddles and then into the crib. . the first night i put him in his bed..and he cried .so in 5 minutes I returned, I layed him back down - i said shhh a couple of times and put his soother back in - then I left the room..and he cried again and i returned in 10 minutes - i did the same thing as before - NOT picking him up. . then i left and WAS going to return in 15 minutes BUT after 10 mintues his crying started to get softer and split up, so i waited and within 17 minutes he was asleep. So he only cried for 32 minutes and then was asleep the first night. . He woke up once during the night
and cried..I waited for 5 and then went in and put his soother back in. then i left and he cried and i waited 10 minutes and he was back to sleep .. . then he woke up at 7. . the next night we did the same exact thing. . this time when i put him to bed i put him in and went back after 5 mintues. . then 10 mintues and then he was asleep within 22 minutes the 2nd night.. . and didnt wake up and cry at all that night. But if he had of i would have done the same thing - but i would have waited 10 minutes before i entered. (instead of 5) . . it took a couple of days for him to get used to it BUT NOW we put him in his crib after his routine and he waves goodbye and he doesnt even make a sound..no complaining no nothing..not exactly sure what he does before he falls asleep..I think he just lays down and off he goes to night night land. . I could NOT be happier. .he sleeps 9-12 hrs a night straight I LOVE IT. . . i never thought i was going to get sleep ever again lol. . but this worked for me. .
NOW onto naps.. . naps are NOT his thing. . . .and never have been. . but when he is super tired i dont stick him in his crib. . he just cries, and it is ok with me if his crib is assosiated with night time sleeps only - so for naps i hold him.. he passes out..i put him on the carpet with a blanket and he sleeps for a while, while i get all my stuff done. .
Hope this was helpful in SOME WAY. . good luck!!

[deleted account]

Well my son is 11 months old now and once he began sleeping through the night at 2 months old that's when we started him on his bedtime routine. He would get a bath at 6:30/7:00 then a bottle with some rice cereal and we would play for about 30min and by 8:30-9:00 he was down for the count. And same thing til this day, he wakes up around 5:30/6:00 ready for breakfast.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

29 Comments

View replies by

Bec - posted on 06/21/2011

183

0

16

I had trouble big time reflux, projectile vomiting, wind you name it I was sleep deprived for a long time I remeber being so tryed I hausinated in the shower just about LOL...I had the early child nurses come out and did controlled crying and wrapping this lead to head bangging and believe me head bangging is terrable!! they grow fast and the cuddles become less maybe somehow get them to sleep in own bed by snugging with them slowly delay your going into the room to snugg bit by bit and give a little reward such as a a very short story when you decide to go into snug and remind them that you will only come into snug when you are ready and when they are lying calm. I use to also spray special majic smells on the pillow(purfume). So spay pillow, tuck em in, leave room and a short time later go in to snug as a reward for being calm at sleep time extend this till they self settle eventually they will and you wont need to hopefully go in at all to snug and there should not be much fuss causing you both stress at bed time. to start with leave room and go straight in to prevent fuss and show them what is happening so they know exactly whats the go. Stick to your deal and be consistant if that message makes sence?

Jennifer - posted on 07/01/2010

8

19

1

First, let me say that I personally don't believe in putting cereal but that's just me :)
I know it will be hard, but you have to let her cry herself to sleep. As long as she knows you'll pick her back up, you don't have a chance in getting her to sleep by herself.
I would feed her, (make sure she burps), change her and lay her down, and then put ear plugs in. If it makes you feel better, when she gets up, go in, lay her back down, tell her it's time to sleep and then put your ear plugs back in. She'll figure it out eventually. I know it's hard. Good Luck!

Jessica - posted on 06/30/2010

78

132

0

I'm giving putting my daughter to bed awake a try. I can't stand to let her cry, but I'm trying to be consistent about keeping her in her crib. So I rub her back and talk soothingly to her. Then I slowly step away from the crib and sit in the rocking chair in her room until she is asleep. Today was the second night and it took 40 mins for her to fall asleep.



After a few days, the time went down to 15 mins.

Emma - posted on 06/29/2010

3

17

0

my son turned one last week and we were having the same problem. we had to rock him to sleep and put him in his cot, then at 1 am he would wake up and would spend the night in the bed with us.

i decided enough was enough. 4 days ago i gave him a bath about an hour before he usually goes to sleep. i then gave him a warm bottle and when he had finished that, put him into his cot awake. i sang him "twinkle twinkle" and left him. he cried. i went in 10 mins later, tucked him in again and left him to cry himself to sleep. it was horrible, but half hour later he was asleep. we had to get him into our bed that night though.

the next night, followed the same pattern but didn't go to him after 10 mins (we didn't go to him at all). he cried again for half hour but fell asleep. when he woke up that night, i gave him another bottle and left him alone. he fell asleep and didn't wake until the morning.

we have done the same thing the night after, and tonight he went to sleep with no crying at all.

it will be hard to cope with, and i think we have been a little luckier than some people, but if you persevere with this, it should work!

good luck! :-)

Jessica - posted on 06/28/2010

78

132

0

@Tania, that sounds exactly like my daughter! I don't get it either, at daycare she will go down fine. They give her her bottle and put her down awake and she goes off to sleep. At home she wants to be fed, rocked, and snuggled and then still wakes up and wants to snuggle more. It is quite frustrating.

Jennifer - posted on 06/01/2010

8

19

1

My daughter goes to sleep @ 8:30pm and sleeps straight through until 7am. I don't believe in cereal in a bottle, so she gets "baby food" @ 6:30 and a bottle afterwards.
I know it's hard, but you have to let her cry when it's bed time. She'll eventually figure it out. As long as shes dry and fed, she'll be fine.
Good Luck!

Kimberly - posted on 05/31/2010

4

15

0

Read he book save our sleep by 'Tizzie Hall" Amazing read with great tricks, tips and help. Our little girl who is almost one now has been in her routine since about 7 months with sleep after i read this book and tried and tested her theories.
Most important thing is patience when trying new things. Bella was in our bed and wouldn't sleep, had a very bad feeding routine, very unhappy little baby till i tried a few tips from the book. It was amazing how after a few weeks of trying and trying our little one responded the way we had hoped. Before i started Tizzie hall's routine bedtime was a horror movie, she wouldn't go down till 10.30-11pm would sleep for bout an hour then wake up screaming, she would wake up to 7 times a night. She was also a very fussy eater which contributed to her bad sleep cause she wasn't full enough to have a good night sleep. Does your little one self settle at all during day naps or do you need to rock them to sleep in your arms? I found that although very hard to leave her self soothe and cry for ages, they are only responding to something new at first when left alone most times. Izzabella now is able to be put to bed at her normal nap/sleep times with a bottle, she feeds herself and nods straight off to sleep without a noise from her now. After a few weeks of me in tears listening to her cry and cry she finally understood what mum was trying to do and she responded beautifully. We now have a happy and well slept household. Bella is in fed, bathed and sound asleep by 7pm most nights now give or take half hour. Babies love routine!!!!
All the best, good luck and keep on trying!!!! You will get there.

Catherine - posted on 05/31/2010

3

24

0

Try putting her down a little earlier. My son is 11 months and he has been going to bed between 7 - 8pm and would sleep till 6 - 7am. I found that the later the put him to bed the earlier he wakes up. The reason behind this is that if you put your baby to bed when is they too exhausted they would sleep as well and would keep waking up. I read many books on sleep training and they all recommend earlier bedtime.
It is also very important to put your baby down drowsy but not asleep. The first few times might be hard so you just stay by their side and try to calm them if they cry. Once they learn how to fall asleep on their own they will be able to fall back asleep in the middle of the night if they wake up. Hope this helps. Good luck!

Jodi - posted on 05/30/2010

5

28

0

My 11month was sleeping through the night. Going to bed at 7.30pm and sleeping til 6.30am.Ever since he got his 2nd tooth, he refuse to sleep in his cot. He has his routine of dinner , bath, book, bottle. He falls asleep while having his bottle, but as soon as you place him in his cot he's awake. I have tired the controlled crying, etc, but he works himself up into such a state he vomits. He has been sleeping in our bed for the last 3 weeks and sleeps through with no problems..... what to do ????

Sophie - posted on 05/30/2010

24

14

0

my son has been sleeping through since he was 3 weeks, we did the normal bedtime, bath, milk and put him in his cot, as long as he was clean and fed then he could cry himself to sleep because we knew he was safe, he dosent nap during the day but thats because he goes to bed at 7 and wakes up at 10 in the mornin, he knows his routine and if we are out past 7 he gets very groggy!

Katey - posted on 05/28/2010

18

0

6

We used Sleep Sense by Dana Obleman. We were putting our daughter to bed around 9:30/10.00pm and she would constantly wake up screaming throughout the night. Turns out she was so over tired, which results in a fitful sleep. Now she gets the same bedtime routine every single night ( change, pjs, wash face, brush hair, brush teeth, storytime, bottle and then cuddles) and we start it at 7. she is usually asleep by 8 and sleeps through till 7am. This worked the first time we tryed it. Also I suggest no naps after 4pm... unless of course the day gets messed up.

Debbie - posted on 05/28/2010

1

20

0

my son just turned 11 months 17th of this month. we had the same problem.up until a few weeks ago., he is now in his own room and goes to bed at 7.r 7.30pm awake r not with a botle of warm milk. when we go 2 bed we just leave a second bottle in bside him if he gets thursty during the night. we notice a huge difference. and both me and my son r gettin a full nights sleep

Janessa - posted on 05/27/2010

289

10

0

What's worked for us, is not picking them up. We have done this with all 3. We had gotten our 11 month old in a bad habit of falling asleep with Daddy while I got the other 2 to bed because we didn't want them to keep him up, and finally we just put him in there and bit the bullet and things are much better. You can't pick them up, especially if you have been trying to let him cry it out because all that teaches him/her is that if they cry long enough you will take them out. You can go in there and give them a pacifier, or tell them you love them, whatever works, but don't pick them up. Anyways, that's just what worked for us.

Tanya - posted on 05/27/2010

77

10

8

Well this is what I do but I don't think it will work because you are bottle feeding. Alannah does not go to sleep by herself so I nurse her to sleep. (We cosleep). She gets up about 7:30 has breakfast, nurses about 9:30 and sleeps for a couple hours. Then she gets up, plays, has lunch, plays, nurses at about 1 or so and sleeps for about an hour. Then it's up again, dinner at 5 and I lay down with her at 8:30. She gets up two or three times during the night to nurse but I really don't notice cuz I am usually asleep. My advice is that your babies are only babies for so long and if you need to cuddle, rock, or nurse them to bed then so be it. Try to move her nap up a little and then maybe she will go to sleep earlier for you. Good luck.

Denise - posted on 05/27/2010

5

1

0

Getting a baby in a routine is hard but be persistant and it will pay off. Start by reducing bedtime 15 minutes early every two or three days till the time you want baby to go to bed. A bottle before bedtime is good but I'm not sure about the rice too. That to me sounds like giving them more energy. If she cries when you put her down, check her after five minutes don't pick her up, lay her down and then check again in ten minutes then double the time every time. It works, no matter what personality the child. It may be harder when they're older, but I did it on mine when she was 3 months old and sleeps from 7pm till 6am right through.
Good luck.

Caitlin - posted on 05/26/2010

42

17

1

My daughter fights as well. I try everything and usually resort to the cry it out method most nights. If that doesn't work, she'll stay up until she's tired. Her bedtime routine starts around 8 and usually she's asleep by 10. She usually sleeps until 10 AM too unless she's wet then she'll go back to sleep. She takes 2 to 3 naps (morning, afternoon, evening) a day. It was hard getting her on a schedule but it can only get better.

Rada - posted on 05/25/2010

2

21

0

My daughter is almost 11 months old but we've had the same routine since she was 3 months old..Now she sleeps through the night except for the nights when she's teething...If she wakes up on a normal night - no teething, she would go back to sleep by herself..Sometimes she would drink some water..She has dinner at 7 -7.30 - solid food..Plays for half an hour..Around 8 she has a bath..After the bath we have some quite time in her room..She nurses. I'd tell her a story or sing to her..I don't rock her to sleep..We just lay together for a little bit and after that I put her in her crib..She's asleep after 10 min..Every bay is different..I found out early on that crying won't help if she has problems to fall asleep..So when she was waking up when she was younger I would pick her up, hold her for a min and she'd fall asleep right back again..She wakes up around 6 am..She has two naps during the day at least 1 hour long, around 9 am and 3 pm..I can't get any credit for the way she sleeps and our routine..I just followed her signs when she was 2, 3 months old..She let me knew when she was sleepy (cranky) and we adjusted the bath time and bed time around her internal clock :)..I tried to shift bed time hour later with the hope that she'd wake up later but it didn't work so I figured I better keep her happy and adjust myself to her regime :))).

Koren - posted on 05/25/2010

2

28

0

I use "Save our Sleep" by Tizzie Hall as a guide for both sleeping and eating routines and have found it to be most helpful. My 11 month old has a feed at 6.30pm and is put to bed awake by 7pm. I pick him up for a "dream feed" at about 10pm and he then sleeps through until 7am 5/7 nights. He is still having two sleeps during the day of at least 1 hour. Teething and illness can throw this out a bit. I would suggest trying to put your little man down earlier and sticking to the same routine each night if you can.

[deleted account]

I'm sure its going to be different for every child. Mine goes to bed around 8:30pm. and wakes up at 5:30am. He wakes up around 4am for a bottle of milk and sleeps till 5:30. Some lucky days he sleeps till 7:30. He hardly takes nap times during the day. If he does, its going to be 10 minutes or a max of 90 minutes. We don't place him in the crib until he's reaaaallly sleepy. His dinner is around 7:30. which is solid food. Then we let him play. Around 8:00pm onwards he's all cranky. But we keep him with us in the family room until he is really sleepy. When is really sleepy we take him to his crib and give him his last bottle of milk for the day. Usually that will do the magic. He is asleep the moment he finishes the bottle. Initially he tried to play in his crib, we would sit and watch him with no expression and ask him to go back to sleep. a few days.. may be 4-5 days later he went to sleep with out playing. The key is to take him to crib only at the last minute. And then even if he wants to play don;t encourage him. Repeat your actions and be patient. I would say , it works 80% of times for us. The rest times we need to rock him for a while. A few days practise and patience may pay off the later convenience .


I have heard some people give a warm water bath or a loopwarm-wipe for the baby before bed-time. That soothes them and helps them to go to bed.

Tania - posted on 05/25/2010

8

11

0

My son is NOT one to cry himself to sleep. He will cry until he throws up. I have tried everything under the sun. He was doing well for a while. I was able to lay him down when he to the point that his eyes were heavy and he was really sleepy. He would go right to sleep. However, for the last couple of weeks, my husband has been out of town and sleep has become a nightmare. The first week he was out of town, my son did not sleep at all. He was up every hour and once I got him back to sleep and laid him down, he would wake up screaming again. I think he was thrown off by my husband being out of town. After an entire week of NO sleep, i figured out he would sleep if he was sitting up in his car seat. So I waited until he's asleep and put him in his carseat and strap him in. He wakes up once for a bottle cause he's going through a growth spurt so I go in, give him a bottle without even picking him up and he drinks it on his own and goes right back to sleep until morning. This is not ideal, but I guess sometimes the "whatever works" strategy has to win out. My husband will be out of town for another month and I am trying to get my son off this routine, but I work full time so I need my sleep too. It doesn't help that he is teething and battling allergies. The way I see it, it isn't going to last forever. He will grow out of this phase soon enough. I'm not worried.

Kat - posted on 05/25/2010

309

37

24

i just started this routine, so there's no knowing if it's great at working or not. i have the same problem with Tristan...he refuses sleep, unless he's dead tired. he'll take a nap if he feels like it, even if he desperately needs one

here's Tristan's :
+++ 5p : last meal (usually mashed potatoes or something super-filling)
+++ 530p : last diaper change & watch Kai Lan
+++ 545p : while he's playing with toys / watching Kai Lan, i go in and get his bed ready
+++ 6pm : take him in his room (sleepy place, not a play place). read a book (usually Nova the Robot builds a friend), lay him down in his play pen, (give him his teething tablets or tylenol if he's teething and needs it), give him his Pooh Bear snuggle blankey, rub Pooh Bear snuggle blankey's head on his eyes, give him his paci, cover him with my My Melody pink fleece blanket (he will sleep with this thing even in 90degree weather..he refuses all other blankets). then i let him turn over once and pull up on the playpen. i then start it all over again with the Pooh Bear, paci, etc. i rub his Pooh Bear on his eyes and say "mommy's gonna be right outside. if you need mommy, just let me know" and tell him goodnight and sweet dreams.

the only thing i have a problem with is even if he'd go to bed at 8 or 9pm, he would STILL wake up at 630am. i havent been able to change his waking time, so i let him choose his own sleep time, which has been 6pm since he was 3 months old

ive done this 3 times so far, and he's fallen asleep in about 20 min - 1/2 an hour. he had always had a bedtime routine we'd follow, but it went out the window when he decided he wasnt gonna have any part of his last bedtime routine.

Jessica - posted on 05/25/2010

78

132

0

I am having the same problem. My 11 month old hates to nap and hates to go to bed at night. I'm still trying to work on it. You'd think with her being my second it would be easier, but she is so strong willed, she screams when we try to put her down awake. I hope we both find something that works.

Chantelle - posted on 05/25/2010

8

43

1

my son is the same way....he barely naps during the day...i wish he would because he is just full of energy never sits still...and doesnt go to bed until 9-1030 at night,,,,but ive just started to let him fall asleep on the living room floor.....he gets a bottle....we watch a disney movie and he rolls around on the floor and evenutally tuckers himself out and passes out,,,then i move him to his crib...he stays in there till about 430 in morning and is up for the day

[deleted account]

i would say your daughter is going to be far too late!
my daughter is 11 and half months and gots to bed between 6 and 6.30pm! she is up at 6am as i have to get her ready for daycare.

so she usually get around 12hrs sleep and sleeps through 9/10 nights. we also dont do night time bottles at all, either before bed or during the night.

if she wakes she gets a drink of water then back to be.

prehaphs try putting her down earlier.

Kylie - posted on 05/21/2010

11

13

0

christina,
it can be very tricky thing this sleeping business! I am much like the other girls my one has slept through the night since 3 weeks old with a rough patch about 6mths old she would wake herself up but that passed and now she is good again.
We were bathing around 9 - 9.30pm and then bottle and then bed with some soft peaceful music give her her blankie and walk straight out if I stay she knows and climbs up and cries..I have to leave some nights she may have a little whinge but like the other mums she will fall asleep eventually....now days we are bathing around 7.30pm and she seems to sleep through until between 6.30 -7am but stays in her cot playing and gabbleing on until we get her up 8 - 8.30am..I guess we formed a routine ffrom birth and have just stuck to it however its not always that simple is it??!!you are doing the right thing maybe not picking up so much but the laying down again is good and just say back to bed twice then nothing just return them to bed persistance is the key...you poor mummy I hope it works out for you lovely xxxxxx keep up the good work!!

Brenda - posted on 05/21/2010

117

0

20

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child - by Marc Weissbluth

Great book. It gives stratagies and advice as well as research behind all his suggestions. I started in on the book when my daughter was about 8 months. I never would have known she needed a nap at 9am, 1pm, and bed by about 6:30pm but I follwed his advice and she still sleeps that schedule at almost a year! He is also understanding of all family styles (family bed, breast or bottle, cry it out or not, etc.)The book is by no means a miricale cure and we still have the occasional rough night but I found it very comforting to have a resource to turn to that actually worked for our family.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms