Help

Jimena - posted on 12/28/2011

First try to stay calm and don't let her take control, remember you're the grown up, My boy used to bite me when he was very anxious or excited, and I opted the same way as kimberly, Also, now that he's a little older, if he slaps me, i slap back on the cheek (it's more the noise that it makes than what it hurts, but it sure surprises him, also, the immediateness of your response is very important, cause it drives the point home as a direct consequence of misbehavior), Another advice I found very helpful was regarding spanking,,, a spanking is due when the child is being willful such as deliberately ignoring your orders or rules, but it should not be done in anger and it should not punish mistakes due to immaturity (like spilling the milk) and it's good to cuddle and kiss as soon as the emotional wall that was there has been brought down,,, I read this in a book called "Building confidence in your child" and another book by the same author is "dare to discipline" (which I haven't read, though) Another thing is now he is a little older, I make him look me in the eye when I tell him not to do something, like running into the street after I'd told him 3 times not to do it,,, I carried him into the house, put him face down over my knee and spanked his little bare butt three times, then I set him down on the floor and got on my knees eye level with him, hugged him and kissed him, and told him to listen to me and look me in the eye (sometimes it takes a little time because he avoids it on purpose either crying or smiling and doing cute things or changing the subject,,,, and he's only 18 months old!) Then when he finally looked me in the eye i told him the street was very dangerous, and he should listen to mommy, making sure he felt how upset and worried for him I was and then I said "calle, no!" (spanish for "not in the street") and then made him repeat it, at least three times (he was still sobby but repeated it many more than three) and to this day, he remembers the lesson,,,now he tells himself, whenever he's tempted to go explore "calle, no!" ,,,of course I still watch him though ;)

Kimberly - posted on 11/22/2011

Oh yes I had one of them lol!!!! First off it is just a age thing and will get better ( I know you dont believe now but it will) Some kids get frustrated because they cant tell you what they want so this is how the vent there frustration. My daughter was a really bad biter and I tried everything, I gave her a bit back( she just tried to do it to me again!) I gave her a smack on the bum, everything!! What I found worked was it she would hit or bit while I was holding her I would tell her "NO! That hurts mommy!" and put her down and walk away, this usually would upset her and I would ignore her for a few minutes then instead of picking her up I would get down on eye level with her and tell her that we dont bit/hit( whichever she had done) and it hurt mommy and I didnt like it. I would make her give kisses and cuddles before I would pick her up. I know you might think this sounds harsh but it was the only thing that I could get her to respond to!!! She just turned two and is pretty good now we still have the odd occasion where the teeth come out but its usually when she is tired so I know when to watch her more closely. When I'm with other kids and she would hit/bit them I would do the same thing but make her sit away from where we were playing and I would still play with the kids then make her say sorry and tell her the same thing about not hurting our friends. Good luck with it and it does get better it just feels crappy when it happening!