10 years old and wanting to shave her legs

Kim - posted on 04/16/2010 ( 113 moms have responded )

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Hi Everyone.
My daughter has just turned 10 and has been complaining that her legs are too hairy and she wants to shave them. I wasn't allowed to do my legs until I was about 14. Am I wrong to not let her? Some friends have suggested that we get her legs waxed and then she won't want to do it for a while but my daughter is saying no way cos she knows it hurts. What do you think?

Kim

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Julie - posted on 10/30/2010

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My daughter had that problem. Her legs were hairy on the extreme. It was very embarrassing to her. I bought her proper tools and taught her how to do it. An age is a guideline but not a hard and fast rule in my opinion. We have to do the best we can for our kids based on needs. If she had large breasts at age 10 you'd get her a bra right? Hope this helps.

[deleted account]

Hi Kim! Personally I would allow her to shave with your supervision and help. I know when I was about 6 I wanted to do all the big-girl things my mom was doing and she let me and taught me!! Just my opinion of course, but who better to show your daughter the right way to do ANYTHING and if you listen to her wants she will be a much more confident young woman in time. Just don't put YOUR childhood on her... We all are different and we all grow and explore at different ages.

[deleted account]

My daughters are 11 and 12, and the 11-year-old has been asking to shave her legs lately. I know if I said "no" and did not let her, that she would eventually sneak and shave her legs and end up hurting herself, as that is exactly what I ended up doing when I was a little girl. I did not want her to use a razor as she could hurt herself. I also did not want to do the waxing as it does really hurt, I do not even like it. I also looked at the creams but was not comfortable with her using chemicals. So, I decided to buy an electric razor especially for women for shaving legs. It was about $70.00 Canadian at Walmart. It worked out great. She can use it in the shower and I do not have to worry about her hurting herself... I still feel that 11 is a bit young but I have to choose my battles and this one just seemed like it was one "yes" and small step to feeling a bit more grown up that I could give her...

Andrea - posted on 10/28/2010

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I have a very hairy 9 year old, it runs in her dads side of the family, and she came home and asked if she could shave her arms because some one had made fun of her, I tried to talk her out of it, and then she made me really, really look at her arms, and they were SSOO hairy I hadn't looked at them like that before. I think that if your child is asking because she is uncomfortable with her hair, and it's not because her friends are doing it, then you might want to consider it? I did and we used woman's shaving cream and shaved her arms? She is so much happier, and if that is all it takes, then it is the least I can do, she doesn't care about her legs, yet, so it wasn't about being old enough to "shave", it was about being more comfortable in her skin?

[deleted account]

I don't see any problem with letting her shave her legs. My mom didn't let me until I was older, (don't remember the exact age) but I remember going swimming and getting comments about how gross hairy legs are. It can be embarrassing and girls want to avoid embarrassment at all costs. It's not about impressing anyone and if it makes her a little more confident, what's wrong with that? Get her an electric shaver or some Nair and show her how to correctly use it.

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Amalia - posted on 07/22/2013

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I told my girls that once they entered middle school (around 12) they could start shaving their legs. My youngest just turned 12 and couldn't wait, so we bought a hair removal cream that comes with a"razor" (it has rubber instead of a blade) for her to "shave" off the hair. This way they can get the hang of it before actually using a razor. Good luck! Just remember, no matter what anyone says, including your child, you are still the mom and you make the rules.

Natalie - posted on 07/18/2013

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Hi i am ten and i have hairy legs too, my mom found out when i was 9 that i started shaving. Now im scared to ask my mom if i can shave because i know she will be like NO :( so i think u should let your daughter shave now, i know how your daughter feels, it feels embarassing . My mom says she had hairy legs too. I said did ur friends call u bad names? And my mom said nah they called me a monkey in a good way. I said oh. Whenever i see a girl with no hairy legs i get jealous . On this summer is REALLY hot , and when i have to wear shorts outside , i keep my chin up and i dont care what people think about me. But i somtimes do. I think you should start let her shaving. ~Natalie

Tami - posted on 11/15/2012

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My daughter wanted to shave at 8 because she said people were constantly makeing fun of how thick her hair was so I went out and bought her a electric razor because I was afraid she would cut herself with a regular razor. She used the electric razor and felt more comfortable with how her legs looked.

Elizabeth - posted on 07/10/2012

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I didn't get a choice here. One day my 10 year comes to me and says "mama, Im shaving my legs" OKAAAAYYY. In her defense, she was already considerably into puberty and getting hairier by the minute. As a mother, there are all sorts of battles I can fight with my girls...I picked this one, not to. The other one is doing it now and it has helped with both of their self esteems. I remember still wearing frilly socks and patent leather dress shoes when al my friends were already shaving , in heals and panty hose. Embarrassing. I didn't want my girls to feel like I did. I draw the line with make up and boys and so many other things so this wan't that big of a deal. They aren't going to be little girls forever, I have to give in on things when its the right time and when they are old enough to care about their appearance and be embarrassed by excess hair, time to let them shave.

Jacqueline - posted on 07/08/2012

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Hello there, I was beside myself last year when my then 11 year old wanted to start shaving her legs.I didnt know quite what to say as i wasnt expecting it to happen this early. But, all in all, if it is going to help her with her self confidence, then why not. Personally I didnt really see the need since she is blonde, but obviously if it hadnt bothered her then she wouldnt have wanted to. First we tryed Nair or neet and that sufficed for a bit, but then it just wasnt working well enough for her. She is almost 13 now and i have her use the venus 5 blade razor and have showed her how to do it, as much as she will let me anyhow. I think the 5 blade razor is very smooth and it is actually pretty hard to cut yourself with it. She is doing fine and I think we made the right decision together. Good luck, and I hope this helps. Jacqueline

Kelly - posted on 07/01/2012

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My daughter was young when she started shaving her legs. Her legs were hairy and her best friend was allowed to shave. What I did was I bought her a "Flicker" shaver online. They used to have these when I was young, but now you have to buy them online. You can't cut yourself with them. She used a Flicker for a couple years and then graduated to a regular razor (I bought her a Venus one because they're better, less chance of cuts). My sister, who has a daughter the same age, took another route - she allowed her daughter to use Nair for sensitive skin in order to remove her leg hair. My daughter tried both and liked using the Flicker shaver better. Waxing HURTS! Try using a hair removal lotion for sensitive skin. :)

Jodee - posted on 06/30/2012

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you know it depends a lot on how hairy her legs are ,and how dark the hair is ,,girls can be cruel ,my daughter had hairy legs she was 11 when i let her the little darlings at her school teased her relentlessly

Laura - posted on 06/22/2012

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This could be my story! I told my daughter she could start the summer before grade 7 but I relented a little and let her start a few months ago (grade 6, age 11) because she kept asking and I know hairy legs can make you feel self-conscious. I made sure she knew what she was getting into: now you will have to shave all the time, it is not a one time thing. I also let her know that she does not HAVE to shave ever. Just because everybody else is doing it doesn't mean it's a have to. I also gave the wax option but she knew it would hurt (it does) so passed.

I think it's harder for us than for them. I looked at it as a female right of passage even though the whole thing is problematic due to sexism and body image issues. I sat beside the tub as she did it the first time and it was a real bonding experience! Almost brought tears to my eyes! Whatever you decide is right for you and your daughter is OK I think.

Sachi - posted on 06/19/2012

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I let my girls do it when they turned 10. They have very dark, thick hair. I was told no when I was a young girl, at 13, and I went and did it myself anyway. When it becomes an issue for them I don't think its wrong to let them do certain things. It doesn't make them grow up any faster. I have a 13 year old who still sleeps with her stuffed bear and likes to get her face painted at parties, lol...it depends on the child too. She wanted to shave because she didn't like the way her legs looked compared to all her other no-so-hairy friends. I understood. We went out and bought Nair. Not the best smelling stuff but it works well. I let them shave their armpits with razors though. To me, its about body image. Girls especially are sensitive about this and I don't want my girls feeling uncomfortable about themselves. I'll let them remove hair, color hair (highlights/streaks), wear lip gloss, nail polish, etc...as long as they are responsible, loving, caring, good girls, get good grades and understand that image isn't everything but it sure feels good when you feel like you look good.

Michelle - posted on 06/16/2012

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My daughter is 12 and has been shaving for the last 6 months. She has been shaving her arm pits for the year plus. My mother and I had many discussions on the subject and I was asking her advice. She kept telling me no matter what my daughter was too young. Then got into the discussion with my sister who actually looked at my daughter's under arms and that is when my mother finally realized why I was asking her opinion. This poor kids has so much dark hair she HAS to shave and this past spring started on her legs. If they are physically bothered by the hair, let them. How would you feel if you had to walk around with the hair she has? I only ask because if you would be willing to walk around like that then fine; but honestly if you wouldn't walk around with your legs like that why make her? Don't let her shave over the knees if you really are against it, but the kids now are growing and developing faster than we did.

Deaunna - posted on 06/04/2012

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Hi Kim,
I raised a daughter and found that girls usually ask for things when they are ready, with the exception of dating. Your daughter's friends are probably shaving and she will feel like a dork if she is the only one not shaving. You can look at it like a great opportunity to boost her self confidence! Give her a really good razor and some good instructions so you won't worry about her safety. Hope this helps!

P.S. As a master parent coach, I respectfully submit, if yours/mine/or their parents did it, that's a good indication the parenting procedure or policy should definitely be reviewed! Most people just pick up their parenting styles from other people and hope for the best- it's like playing Russian Roulette with your child.

Allison - posted on 06/03/2012

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I would let her shave them. My daughter is 14, when she was 6 i decided to let her shave. Her legs weren't that hairy but she is a dancer and wear revealing clothes, and I wanted her to be used to shaving. When she was 12 I paid for laser hair removal for her entire body (Including pubic area).

Corinne - posted on 05/18/2012

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I remember when I was younger my younger sister begged me to shave her legs at that age. She needed it. I went behind my mom's back and taught her how to do it. It was such a confidence boost for her and my mom even admitted it was the right move. If she's asking to do it I would go ahead and teach her how.

Shell - posted on 05/15/2012

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My 10 year old daughter did the same and has really dark hair was starting to get embarrsed at school, I naired her legs which keeps the hair soft and you only have to repeat every 3-4 months and it's harmless to them and does not hurt. This will help them not have to shave until they are teenagers and until the hair gets to course to nair them. It's easly and all you do is leave it on there for 3 mins and wipe it off with a rag, child is happy and so is mom for not worring about her cutting her legs all up.
I know this post is sort of old but thought it was good info to share..
Shell

Sandra - posted on 03/17/2011

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I wouldn't be too overly concerned. My daughter started when she was 10 and she's 13 now, still a well adjusted very focussed girl - she didn't go off the rails simply because she started shaving. I asked her why she wanted to start and yes it was indeed peer pressure, everyone else at school is doing it and the girls feel quite different when they have to get into their PE shorts with hairy legs. This is a different generation to us - perhaps as generations go by we'll get less and less hairy :-) Good luck with your daughter hope you make the right choice for her.

Sandra - posted on 03/17/2011

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I wouldn't be too overly concerned. My daughter started when she was 10 and she's 13 now, still a well adjusted very focussed girl - she didn't go off the rails simply because she started shaving. I asked her why she wanted to start and yes it was indeed peer pressure, everyone else at school is doing it and the girls feel quite different when they have to get into their PE shorts with hairy legs. This is a different generation to us - perhaps as generations go by we'll get less and less hairy :-) Good luck with your daughter hope you make the right choice for her.

Angela - posted on 03/15/2011

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You can get these this that are like a mit kinda look like sand paper and it is totally harmless it is called Silky Mit Hair Removing Glove it works without blades or chemicals..

[deleted account]

My 12 year old is shaving, She had really hairy legs and her friends would make comments about it. She is only allowed to use a girly electric shaver though. I think it depends on the situation of the child, my older daughter 14 started shaving at 13. They are not allowed razors yet.

[deleted account]

the fact that unless she plans on moving to europe where they like hairy ape women she is going to shave eventually. So why prolong her anxiety any longer. Just teach her how to shave her legs without filleting herself. Or use Nair - I can't because it burns my skin.

Natalie - posted on 10/30/2010

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Well, my daughter was bugging me about the same thing, She is almost 11. She has been shaving since this summer. She has an electric shaver. This way she can't cut herself. I knew she would hate the prickly hairs once they start to grow in. I was right. She hates shaving now and she is going to quit shaving until next summer now. I got her to quit bugging me, she learned for herself that it isn't all that great, and she didn't get hurt from a sharp razor either. This is a personal choice and you know her best. If you let her, it won't be the end of the world. Now that it si Fall though, tell her to hold off until next summer and then you will teach her how.

Belinda - posted on 10/29/2010

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All kids mature at differently. I remeber being in a out 5th grade when a so called friend at school pulled my pants down and then made fun of me for having hairy legs...I was humiliated. It didn't help that I was already the fat kid. I went home and begged...my mom just didn't understand...I ended dry shaving (cringe) my legs...ugh...I think this needs to be based on the individual child. I would prefer my daughter to come to me and discuss it rather than have something happen because I didn't truly listen and discuss the issue.
I just went through something similar with my son over the summer....I explained that unless he was a professional swimmer...there was no need for him to shave...for men it seems hairy doesn't have the same meaning as for women...lol

Kim - posted on 10/24/2010

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I was bullied through my whole lower school experience from year 1-7 because I had hairy legs. I vowed that my daughter would never go through what I did. She is by no means hairy but the kids at school had made remarks. She was about 9 when I used to use creams to remove the hair. She is 11 and now uses her own razor. Sure she gets cut now and then but on the whole does a really good job. Its all up to the parent but any decision is the right one for your own child.

Stephanie - posted on 10/06/2010

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Hey Kim,
Our 10 year old daughter has been asking to shave her legs since she was 9. I helped her do it so that she wouldn't hurt herself. When the hair started growing back she hated it. She hasn't asked to shave again. We decided to talk about waxing so that the hair stays gone longer. McKenzie is afarid it's going to hurt to bad. I think if she is ready let her. Just watch closely and make sure you help. Good luck Kim our babies are sure growing up!!
Smiles,
Stephanie

Lilith - posted on 10/06/2010

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i have three girls 12 14 and 19 all at home. Shaving is an activity we do together at home.... always a very nice time for all of us

Tracy - posted on 09/29/2010

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i told my 11 yr old that her hair is blonde,if you start shaving it now it will come in black and you will have to shave more often or you will look like a hairy ape plus in the winter time you will be wearing pants know one will see your legs but you,wait untill the time comes

Terri - posted on 09/25/2010

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We let our youngest daughter start shaving at 8! She started complaining so I told her to let me see her legs.... they were pretty bad! I took her to the restroom and taught her the correct way to shave and explained the saftey and proper use of a razor. Todays kids are progressing alot faster than what we did when we were growing up! You have to be the judge of it though!

Theresa - posted on 09/24/2010

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i'm not agreeing or disagreeing on the shaving at that age

i just wanted to say that my neice shaves and is about the same age as stated, I told her mom to get her the shick intuition razor, IMO it is harder to be cut by one of these since the blades are surrounded by the shaving lotion. just a thought :)

LaMoya - posted on 09/23/2010

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I definitely do not agree with the shaving of the legs. First of all it is a proven fact that the more you shave the more you get back. With that being said, she is 10. This conversation should not even being occuring. In real life who cares about a 10 yr. olds legs. Not a normal person. Can you even grow leg hair at that age? And if you can who the f cares????????????????????????? If this is a ? I want to know who is asking it because you are suspect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:(

JANINE - posted on 09/23/2010

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Well it a good thing teaching her to be a lady and clean and tidy, as a female. i really dont think its any harm.

Priscilla - posted on 09/22/2010

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Put yourself in her shoes...shes probably been teased at school about it. I let my girls shave when they felt self conscious about it...it was around 5th grade. I see nothing wrong...its only hair. I wasnt allowed to shave my legs at my daughtters age I had to wait till 13. I went behind my moms back and shaved anyways...I did get caught but the "damage" was done...so I kept at it. I dont see any harm in her shaving. Just make sure you let her know once its done its done and she has to keep it up at least every 2-3 days.

Raelene - posted on 09/17/2010

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My daughter was 11 or 12 when she came out of the bathroom with these cuts on her legs, I asked her if she had shaved her legs she said 'no the razor fell into the bath' (yea whatever!!!) I then said ok what is done is done told her that if she liked the smooth feeling she would have to shave every day or 2 and then told her how to shave her legs properly so we didn't have another "the razor fell in the bath episode".
They will do it regardless,

Julie - posted on 09/16/2010

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Kim their is no hard and fast rule however your first point of call should maybe the doctor to check if she as a over active thyroid if so something can be done about it. I remember being younger than 10 and I was bullied at school they used to call me monkey girl because my legs looked like a mans it turned outmy thyroid was the culprit this also affect mood swings a girls monthly cycle weight so it is important. Remember she will be going to high school soon not sure if your in the UK or USA and her peers can make her life difficult all she will want to do is fit in. Always remember their are no 2 children alike theirfore what is right for one child will not always be right for another of the same age.
kind regards Amethyst akaJulie

[deleted account]

I think if she has hair to shave and she is uncomfortable with the presence of hair on her legs, you should just let her shave it. She'll do it anyways, I'm sure. Show her the proper way to shave and buy her the proper implements. My mum gave me an electric razor eventually because I always came out of the shower with slices on my legs.

Gloria - posted on 09/13/2010

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my daughter is 10 she came to me when she was 9 and asked if she can shave, now she is a little on the hairy side when it comes to her legs. I told her I would think about it, and left it at that because she did catch me by surprise by asking me because I myself I don't think i started till I was 14 or 15, but i will always tell myself times have changed and kids are so grown now at an early age. She doesn't like the way it looks with shorts, and yes it does become a problem at school when you have other children who grow into these things faster than others. But now that I;ve read many comments here, i think I will go ahead and let her step it up! Thanks for everyones comments it helps alot to know that i'm not the only one out there with a 10 year old going on 15!! :)

Candi - posted on 09/13/2010

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My parents never set an age for when I could shave my legs. I just started shaving one day...and regretted it ever since! My oldest dughter is like me, very hairy! When she was 8 kids were teasing her about the hair on her legs (its dark), so she asked if she could shave it off! I said "are you crazy? NO!" so I bought her Nair. She loves it. She is 10 now and she uses Nair and only has to use it every other month or so. It works great for her. I think I am beyond help!! lol. she can wear shorts and dresses without being embarrassed now. She uses it when she feels her hair is showing and only goes up to her knees. I don't have to worry about her scarring her legs, the chemicals are not an issue, it doesn't burn her skin and she is happy. Razors are too expensive nd too risky for a child. Might as well give your son a knife to shave his face with!

Jamie - posted on 09/12/2010

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I have a ten year old that will be 11 in Nov. She wants to start shaving. I told her that once you start you have to continue cause it grows back thicker and darker. She is hairy and it is dark colored but I think we can wait a little longer. When she was younger she thought she was suppose to shave her face like her Daddy and ended up cutting her lip with a razor.

Kim - posted on 05/03/2010

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Thank you so much for all your comments everyone. To answer one main question that keeps popping up is that my daughter is blonde. You can't really see the hair on her legs but I think she wants to because some of her friends are. Like some of you have said you have to pick your battles and fighting over smoking drinking and drugs (even homework!!) is the better fight.

Once again thank you so much everyone, you have all been really helpful and it is good to get all the different opinions. xxx

Rebeca - posted on 04/28/2010

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Hi Kim

My daughter is 12 and started high school this year but when she was 10 and in grade 5 she cfame home one day and asked if she could shave her legs as her friends were commenting on how hairy they were. Her friends were all blonde and already shaving, and she is very dark.

At first I said no as I felt she was too young but then I thought about it and figured it is not that big a deal and if it was upsetting her it was better to give her my blessing and make her feel I understood her concerns, than have her do it at afriends house without my permission, in which case would I need to punish her for disobeying me? I talked to my mum about it and she suggested that I just let her do it but using my electric razor rather than a razor blade.

I spoke to my daughter and told her I had thought about it and if it was really important to her then I would allow it and I showed her how to use the electric shaver. She shaved once and a few months later I mentioned it as she had not done it again and she said that she couldnt be bothered shaving, it was too much work and she wasnt really concerned about her hair anyway.

She has only just started shaving again now coz she is in high school, and I now buy her the schick intuition razor and she has never even nicked herself.

I think we do need to make our daughters feel that we are at least willing to think about and consider their requests if they are reasonable.

I know most of us did not shave until the age of 15 or so, but life has changed a lot and children are growing up much faster these days. It is important that they are not teased or ostracized over things that can be easily solved such as hairy legs.

Good luck, I am sure you will do the right thing for your daughter. Nobody knows her as well as you do so you will know if she is ready for this important step.

Jill - posted on 04/28/2010

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my daughter was ten when i let her start shaving,i bought her some good shave gel and razors and lotion.the first few times i had to stand watch but she learned really fast,and does great now.i say let her just coach her through it.

Ashley - posted on 04/26/2010

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First and foremost, are her legs hairy and is the hair visible? Darker haired girls do have this issue at younger ages than fair haired females. I allowed both my daughters to shave their legs at early ages due to the fact that the leg hair was so visible and they wore dresses and skirt/blouse outfits alot. For those using the old worn out statement that they weren't allowed, times have changed, it's 2010 ladies!! Show her the proper ways of SAFELY shaving her legs and to not rush.

Joanne - posted on 04/26/2010

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My daughter is 13, she asked to shave her legs when she was about 10 aswell. at first i was against the idea, then i thought back to when i was her age and my parents wouldnt let me shave mine till i was 14. I got so much stick from scholl that i decided that at the end of the day, its only hair and it will grow back. I bought her a ladyshave to be safe, it made her happy and more confident within herself

Mardell - posted on 04/25/2010

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Hello...My daughter started with that question in 5th grade also..I said you are to young, and held her off until I noticed it was becoming very dark. I then bought her the schick INTUITION shaving kit. I explained that she could shave her calves but to never shave more than 4 inches above her knees. I also made her realize that she would need to shave daily!! Well we now are in 8th grade, shaving fell by the wayside until its time to braid. Now we are on eyebrows which I take her to have them cleaned up, but yesterday she took her dads beard trimmer and now has pencil thin brows on the outer edges. OMG!!! Ladies, girls are always in the making.

Kelly - posted on 04/24/2010

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Call me a bad mom, but my daughter has been shaving since 3rd grade! The reason? She was sweating to death in those long pants!. I felt bad that a kid that age wouldn't wear shorts on our vacation to Florida! I don't think there is a number that makes it right. My hairy friend said it best. "The right age to shave is when you daughter is embarassed to leave the house without doing it." She is 14 now, and neither one of us regrets starting that early.

[deleted account]

I am a bit shocked that this is such an issue for so many moms. This shaving thing is not about us moms. It's about our daughters.

I have an almost 14 yr old daughter. Her hair became darker and pretty noticeable before she ever asked me about shaving. I was already prepared for her to ask because of this and was just waiting for her to be ready. She started shaving around age 10 and has been fine. Bonus: she didn't shave often at first because it didn't grow back that fast. This is a basic hygiene issue. There may be a variation of peer pressure involved, but that's why we ask questions to find out why they want to do things.

Seriously, we are parents with minds of our own; we are adults. Just because when we were growing up our parents made the rules, and many of them are quite good, doesn't mean some of those rules are infallible. They did what they thought was best. Sometimes it was best, sometimes it wasn't. As parents in our own right, we are capable of creating at least some of our own rules, especially if we use good judgment. Ultimately, there are 3 questions in my mind: If my legs looked like hers, would I shave my (her) legs? What reasons does she give for wanting to shave? Why would we put our daughters through mental and social pain by disallowing them shave when it is biologically visible that it is time, regardless of their age? Just my outspoken 2 cents!

Missy - posted on 04/24/2010

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it is a hard decision i had to start shaving my daughters legs at age 8 she was self coincise about it i do it for her so i know it is done right and she is not touching a razor

Angie - posted on 04/24/2010

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I let mine start the summer before her 6th grade year. Middle school gym class is much different than elementary and most girls are shaving around middle school age. 14 or 15 is waaaaay too late to let them shave. Just my opinion.

Jackie - posted on 04/24/2010

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my 9 yr nearly 10 shaved her legs and i said why she say got hairs but u dont need to worry bout them i think this days kids talk to much how they look and do wat other kids do tbh

Renee - posted on 04/23/2010

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My daughter was the same way, and I wasn't ready to let her shave yet either. I was able to hold her off by getting her those things they used to advertise on TV all the time- smooth away (https://www.getsmoothaway.com/ver55/index.asp). You can get them at Walgreens and they actually work well on their never been shaved hairs, I was shocked! I finally gave in when she was about 11 1/2 and let her start shaving, she is now 12 and does great with it. You have to do what is right for you, I try to keep in mind how cruel kids can be with teasing these days though. If letting her shave keeps her from getting teased for having hairy legs, I'm all for it. Hope this helps! Good luck!

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