10 years old but going on 14 years old

Krista - posted on 12/28/2008

I also have an 11 yr. old daughter. I had read to just walk away from them when they start in on the attitude and are being disrespectful. I find it to work. I also let her see how nice it is when we are getting along and mutual respect and consideration go a long way.

Michele - posted on 12/28/2008

My 12 yr old son also has attitude problems at times. He tries telling me or my husband and I what he thinks or is going to do. Or if we tell him to do some chore...he will reply, "no, I will do that later. I am going to play videos/watch tv now." I have to remind him that he is still the child and I the parent and that we decide what he does and when. My husband flips b/c sometimes I can see his reasoning...and will relent or change my mind. Or I will give him a choice on what to do or when. I know he needs to learn to organize himself and his schedule...and he needs to learn what needs to be done first before playing games or watching tv. My son also gets emotional and takes things personally....which also drives my husband crazy. I understand the hormones and emotions...I try to remind my husband that its ok...its just hormones. He will get over it. ...... men don't accept hormones and emotions being ok...lol. I know I need to be strong with my son...but he also needs to learn how to be self sufficient and self organized....where do you draw the line? LOL.

Amy - posted on 12/27/2008

Hormones do matter! I think that is one piece of the overall puzzle and better understanding it will help you both. Has she begun developing but not yet started menstruating? What coping strategies have you given her to use and are you trying to use yourself?

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Amy
http://empoweringgirlsandwomen.blogspot....

Crystal - posted on 12/18/2008

My 10 yr old son acts like he is older then his age also. His attitude sucks. Like he doesnt steal or anytyhing that way but he does a lot of back talking and is very rude to his step father. He is a smart ass with everything also.

Emilie - posted on 12/18/2008

You know Jacqueline Chance it makes a lot of sense because my daughter gets in these moods that us women would around our cycle time. Oh my god, it makes so much sense and better way to understand what the heck is going on into her mind. I will for sure keep this in mind... It might help too to understand the situation better and not get so frustrated! Thanks for that info...

Jacqueline - posted on 12/16/2008

I actually spoke to my daughters doctor when she turned 9 and started with an attitude, but it wasn't all the time. It would kinda just happen what seemed like out of the blue. he told me to start writing down when it would happen and how long it would go on,so I did. After that I noticed it was a certain time of month and usually lasted as long as your cycle would. I told him and he said that at about age 9 (sometimes) a girls body will start acting as if they are having their cycle even though their not, their body is preparing its self. Even though they may not actually start until they are 11 or 12, and most of the time iher time will be the same as her mothers. Just something to keep in mind, not that it makes the attitude ok. I just told my daughter I understand your body is changing, but there is still a right and wrong way to handle things, and if you'll trust me seeing how I've already been there we can do it the right way the first time.

Carolina - posted on 12/16/2008

I have an 11 year old girl and she tends to get an attitude every now and then, at first I will get firm in front of everybody (as always had) but I noticed that this just show her that she had the power of getting me angry, now I take her to the side talk to her with love remainding her that she is a great girl and asking her why she does that and that it would be so much better to think before acting or saying things that can hurt me or others and that she would regreat later. Almost always this attitudes are just to call attention or to messure us as moms, it has work for me to let her know that there is a time and a place for everything and that she will have the power when there is her time to have it and that it sure comes with responsabilities and learning, thats not something I own and that I will give to her, is something she will deserve because of her actions.

Emilie - posted on 12/15/2008

Yes my daugther has a brother of 12 years old. But my son is like my girl..He is very emotional and fragile and all the "girly" stuff... I think that sometimes she gets jealous or feel left out because my husband is always after him for crying or not doing something right. But he does spent a lot of time of fooling around with her too.

Tiffany - posted on 12/15/2008

It's the age unfortunately, especially with girls. I have my 11 year old acting exactly like that too. Everything I did and said this weekend she got attitude with me and became
defensive and argumentative. I, like the other moms that responded, have to remind her that she is only 11 and she is being hurtful and although I have never had to be firm with her, I am now, and she doesn't like it very much. Does your daughter have older siblings?

Jamie - posted on 12/13/2008

I have the same problem with my 11 year old. She takes after my younger sister who is 19. I have to remind her of her actual age when she gets an attitude. It also helps to let her know that when she has an attitude toward you, it can hurt your feelings. Most kids don't want to upset their mothers.

Felicia - posted on 12/10/2008

I seem to have the same problem every so often. My 11 year old daughter tries to get an attitude with me like this. Most of the time it is when she gets around her older sister for a little while and I use to ignore it but now I know that I have to stand firm and let her know that I am in control and not her.