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Grandmother's visit ??

Nikki - posted on 02/14/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I want other people opinion about....My mom is here visiting from another state, the plan was for her to stay for the month of February. Now she has decided to stay possibly until June. My 13 year old son and her got into a disagreement tonight about his room and the chore of cleaning the bathroom. He usually does not have chores to do, for the most part I will tell him to clean his room. My mom expect more and she is here making rules he is not use to. What should I do...should I allow her to enforce the rules that she gave to me as a child or should I not allow it and let it stay the way its been in my home when she isn't here. Any feedback will be great

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8 Comments

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Felicia - posted on 02/24/2010

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Well, I'm with your mom on the chore thing. My kids clean their own rooms, do their own laundry, clean their bathroom,do the dinner dishes and clean up after the dogs. However it is your house so she probably shouldn't make new rules without your consent. But in no way should he ever argue or disrespect his grandmother.

Lisa - posted on 02/24/2010

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I agree with other post. Its actually really good for a 13 to have chores, it teaches them responsibility. I do on the other hand does not believe that it is up to your mum to tell hime what those chores are. I think you should have a meeting with your mum and son and explain the guidlines. What is expected of him as far as chores are concerned. I think you should have a separate meeting with your mum to explain to her that your son does not usually do chores and it will be up to you to decide what he does and does not do.



Good luck

Janna - posted on 02/19/2010

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I agree with everyone. My mom is very pushy of her opinions. I have told her on more than one occassion that my girls are my children and while she may voice her opinion to me, she needs to let me be the mom and not tell them what to do chore wise.

Traci - posted on 02/16/2010

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I completely agree with Theresa. It's your house and your rules. Before I even had my girls, I tried to nicely make it clear that my kids would be mine - period. People can give input, if they do it respectfully, but in the end it is your son. I wish you the best. No matter what, I know it's not a fun situation.

Nikki - posted on 02/14/2010

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I was thinking the same thing that he will no longer look forward to her visit, he will see her as the enforcer..Thanks

Nikki - posted on 02/14/2010

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thank u for ur response, u could not have put it better.

Theresa - posted on 02/14/2010

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I think it's your home and you should run it the way you see fit. If you let grandma come in and make a bunch of new rules for your son it will make him resent her and not want her to visit anymore. Just explain that you appreciate that she is trying to help, but that you have set up rules for your house that your family all agree on and that it works for you.

Emily - posted on 02/14/2010

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Well, I agree with your Mom that your 13 year old should share more responsibility around the house. He will be on his own in 5 years and it is your responsibility to teach him those things.

I feel strongly that your mother should NOT, however be enforcing new rules in your home. (I am sure your Mom just wants to help) You should talk to your Mom and let her know that her job is to be Grandma (play games, give hugs...) you will make and enforce the rules.

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