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How do I make moving into a new city easier for my daughter?

Kelly - posted on 12/05/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Hi Everyone,

My 10 year old and I have recently moved to a new city. Since the move she has been sad or angry. I know the move has been very hard on her and I am trying to understand how it must feel from her point of view to have her world change like it has. I have tried to take her out to explore the city in the hope that she would become more comfortable but that has not worked. I have tried to talk to her about how she is feeling but she turns me away. I have even asked what I could do to make her feel better but again no answers. Does anyone have any advice or suggestions that could help?

Thanks

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4 Comments

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Kelly - posted on 12/13/2011

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Thanks everyone for all of your advice. My daughter has made a couple of new friends one of which invited her over this past weekend she is in much a better mood and is smiling more. Thanks Again!!

Tammy - posted on 12/11/2011

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Moving to a new city is hard but it sounds like you are doing the right things... showing her around, trying to communicate, etc. The BIGGEST thing for kids is not the move or the new surroundings though... usually it is just really missing their old friends, and trying to fit in at the new school & make new friends. Is there a way for her to connect with her old friends such as setting up skype dates or planning a summer visit ? Also getting her involved in school or other activities she enjoys, such as sports will help her to make new connections . It will get easier ( I've been there ) good luck.

Debb - posted on 12/08/2011

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I just had to pull my son (6th grade this year) out of one school and put him into another because we moved. It's not a new city of course, but I understand what you're going through. He really struggled! He was opening up to me though, in fact I had more than one night of talking over the problems with my tearfully frustrated son. He wasn't making friends and didn't like his teachers or classmates. Ugh. So, I "invited" him to join every possible school activity he could find. And of course, by invited I mean, forced. He was pretty irritated with me at first, but now we have track, school ambassador and a spelling bee underway. He even volunteers now after school to help the K-1st graders with reading and math. I think he just needed to get in there and get involved! :) His social calendar is full once again and his grades are back up. Yeah!!

Jeru - posted on 12/05/2011

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We had moved from our home of 7 years when our son was 8-9 years old. The way that we dealt with it was we just made it into this big adventure. (I saw that you'd done that, like exploring the city and all). Is she really good at making new friends? That helps a ton if she is outgoing in that way. If she is, keep taking her to the same parks or places that have a lot of children. Reach out to one of the parents that are there and make a friend yourself. Making a connection with a new family that has the same aged children was our remedy. Her new friend will take the sting out of her hurt. Also, keep up the web cam for her so that she can keep in contact with her old buddies or sit down and write a letter with her to her old friends. Know this, it WILL get better. Keep reminding yourself of that, and keep chipping away at her. She'll come around. This too shall pass :)

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