How do you deal with a teen and a tween who do not listen or behave because their rules at their other parent's house are much more relaxed than your own?

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Sarah - posted on 01/18/2009




I think Joy has some great advice :D Probably because that's what we do lol. My son is with me during the week. and at his dad's every second weekend. He comes home rude and with attitude. This past week things havce changed for the better. not sure what we said to change it. but for now it seems to be working. he even came back from his dad's with no attitude.

Joy - posted on 01/18/2009




The one thing that children need is rules and when they are at your house you have rules that they need to listen to. It is hard when you share you children with the other parent. I have family that have the same thing going on. You just have to make it clear that it is your house you are the parent and that they will mind or they will have to dill with the consquenses even if they go to the others house continue the punishment when they return. If you take there phone away don't give it back till you see them again. Shared custidy is hard when both parents aren't on the same page with punishment. I don't know if you are religuise but the Bible has good verses on obeying your parents Ephesians 6:1-4 and Philippians 2:14-16 have them read it and then remind them everytime they don't obey that the Lord wants them to obey and that he will not be happy with their behaver. Well I hope this helps. God Bless!

Bec - posted on 01/16/2009




Hi there we are having the same problem at our house. She is here with us during the week and at her mums over the weekend. She is pretty well behaved at our house and then she goes to her mums and comes back a totally different child. It is so hard and causes conflict with my husband and my self but we all just stick to the rules we have in place and she just deals with them. But then just as she is back to being co-oprative she goes back again. Man its hard.

Gwen - posted on 01/16/2009




oooh, if I knew the answer to that one!  And then just when you get them behaving, they are gone again.

I agree, though, your rules are your rules.  it's just like at school, where they have a whole nother set of rules they have to learn.

Nicky - posted on 01/16/2009




stick to your rules . kids need rules . dont let them play you off on mum either . chances are mums saying same to them or is hoping for some help getting them to behave but dosnt want to ask.

Trish - posted on 01/16/2009




Stick to your rules, take away goods and services until they respond, I have two teens and have been going through the same thing, it seems to work! Good luck your doing a good job!

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