I got a summon to be in court regarding my 17 year old son.......Truancy...... in other words he was lieing to me about going to school. What would ya'll say to the judge that wants to fine you for trusting your kid.

Charisma - posted on 04/15/2009

With KIDS these days their is no win to this. TRUSTIN got you  this trouble. And its sad that we try to be the best parents by cuttin lack on somethings by lettin them be adults and of course WE get kicked in the ASS for it. So sweet Im so sorry.

Dont take this the wrong way but AMERICA  punishes us everyday for havin KIDS.

Mother - posted on 04/15/2009

Quoting LaShay:

Just like to say first of thank you all MOMS for the feedback. The judge ended up giving my son 64 hours of community service instead of a 463.00 fine.......Thank God!! Then pressed on letting me know excactly all of his attendance and grades and teachers comments.(Which I could of used from the beginning instead of the end!) Which were so bad i was completely embarrassed. Of course my son was sitting there as if we were interrupting his day, with the most ungrateful attitude ever seen. She then looked at me and told me if he was 3 times late or absent for the classes then she would place us both under arrest.....now im in shock by this point, dont get me wrong I know my son is no angel, but Damn, i never saw this coming....the school board appointed guys were there and said what now is recommended was to withdrawl my son from school, so we would not end up in jail. For him to get his GED. She agreed and so I had to go do just that! Oh yeah then also turned to me and fined me...I told her im not guilty of anything wrong but trusting my 17 year old son. I made many trips to his school and spoke to teachers counselors vice principals. You name it I was on it. So I told her between 4 kids I couldnt afford a fine, so I was sentenced 10 hours of community service......at my church,guys. How humiliating. This had to be one of the worst days of my life!!!!

This is assinine and my heart is breaking for you. I am still shaking my head. what does your son have to say for himself?? anything? Does he even vocalized why he didn't attend? Is something bothering him? I was a rebel child and everyone knows I took the unpaved dirt road more times then not......but WOW what a journey and the scenery is WAYYYY nicer!!! *laffs*

Mother - posted on 04/15/2009

WHAT??? Are you kidding me?? don't the courts have better things to do then try to make kids go to school?? Not that I am condoning your son's behaviour but give me a break. It is his right to refuse. Maybe he learns differently then most kids...he may be hands on or artistic...which most school frown upon. Maybe he doesn't know what he wants to be yet....it happens. I hate how society tries to fit every kid into this one size fits all mold.



He is a teenager and he probably is hard to talk to....I know I was. But he is special and brilliant in his own way. Maybe he just needs time. I know myself although I did finish school and went on to do more schooling that I would be a far better student right now. I didn't know what I wanted and everyone pushing me to do what they thought was right was more confusing then my own thoughts. I'd tell the judge to get a life and to go deal with pressing issues like murderers and rapists. Remove him from school if that is the case and let him realize on his own...life is not a bed of roses. Its amazing how quickly we turn around.

LaShay - posted on 04/15/2009

Just like to say first of thank you all MOMS for the feedback. The judge ended up giving my son 64 hours of community service instead of a 463.00 fine.......Thank God!! Then pressed on letting me know excactly all of his attendance and grades and teachers comments.(Which I could of used from the beginning instead of the end!) Which were so bad i was completely embarrassed. Of course my son was sitting there as if we were interrupting his day, with the most ungrateful attitude ever seen. She then looked at me and told me if he was 3 times late or absent for the classes then she would place us both under arrest.....now im in shock by this point, dont get me wrong I know my son is no angel, but Damn, i never saw this coming....the school board appointed guys were there and said what now is recommended was to withdrawl my son from school, so we would not end up in jail. For him to get his GED. She agreed and so I had to go do just that! Oh yeah then also turned to me and fined me...I told her im not guilty of anything wrong but trusting my 17 year old son. I made many trips to his school and spoke to teachers counselors vice principals. You name it I was on it. So I told her between 4 kids I couldnt afford a fine, so I was sentenced 10 hours of community service......at my church,guys. How humiliating. This had to be one of the worst days of my life!!!!

LaShay - posted on 04/15/2009

Quoting Sarah:

I feel for you!  laws here are strict regarding that issue and last year i got a letter from my 11 year old's school saying if he missed one more day i would have to go to court.  in my case, though, i knew about all the absenses my son had.  it still stung cause its like "they" are making you out to be the bad parent when thats not the case at all!  if your son was lying to you, maybe the judge can make him do some community service to pay you back the fine you will pay?  and why dont schools call parents anymore?   when i was in school, they ALWAYS called to verify that i wasnt there that day.  if my son's school would have called me even once last year they would have known that he wasnt in school that day for sure instead of assuming wrong. 

 

if i were you, i would tell the judge point blank....you thought he was going to school, you didnt know he was leaving after you dropped him off or whatever.  accept the fine the judge will impose (cause he will do that anyways) and then ask him what you can do to change the situation. 

Lynn - posted on 04/15/2009

WHAT I DO WITH MINE IF I WERE 2 FIND OUT THAT THEY WERE CUTTING SCHOOL....IF THEY WERE OF LEGAL AGE PUT THEIR NON GOING TO SCHOOL ASS OUT..AND IF THE WASENT OF AGE AND THE JUDGE FINES ME I WOULD HAVE MY KID DO SOME HARD LABOR (AROUND THE HOUSE ...FOR MONEY OF COURSE THEN WHEN IT'S TIME 4 THEM 2 GET PAID ...I WOULD TELL THEM THAT  THIS MONEY HAS 2 GO 2 THE JUDGE BECAUSE THEY DECIDED NOT 2 TAKE THEIR BUTT 2 SCHOOL....CAUSE I'M NOT GONNA USE MINE I HAVE 2 PAY BILLS...SO WHY NOT USE THEIRS INSTEAD....  

Belinda - posted on 04/14/2009

Schools are just simply not what it used to be. I feel like it's more and more of a babysitting service these days, and not a very good one. I don't know where you are, but here, "our wonderful school days", do not exist hardly. I guess that would actually depend the self esteem and self dicipline a child has, and their own drive to want it. We can want it for them until the cows come home, but ultimately, it's up to them. It was soooo much easier when my son was in elemetery, even early jr. high, but the hand holding stops at some point. I didn't say no hands on, just a time when they either get it, and do it, or not! Sounds like you've definitely have gone beyond your call of duty, so whatever the judge has penalized you for, I just hope you have it in you to double it on your 17 yr. old. He is the soul bearer of this problem that he has inadvertantly shared with you. I would have much rathered my son to come to me and tell me up front, and stayed honest w/ me from the start. I can accept alot, but not being honest sure stirs it up w/ me. Good Luck! Keep your chin up!

Denise - posted on 04/14/2009

Our school sends home a note after 6 days missed for any reason. Good idea for truancy but not if just sick for a few days --- I was not happy about the letter anyways ---- does your school have a program that you can look up his grade and days in school. Our does and it's wonderful to check to see what my teenager is getting as far as grades.



If you really did not know that your kids was skipping then I do not see how it is your fault --- are you surposed to be with him 24/7 -- I think not -- I hope teh judge understands that ----- good luck.

Theresa - posted on 04/13/2009

i agree with Sarah Owens! Schools should ring the parents if the kids aren't in school. It's not your fault that your 17yr old wants to take off after you drop him off! i was a handful when i was in high school and from my experience, there would be a reason why he doesn't want to be there in the first place. there might be a problem with that school!! But with the judge, i would tell them that you did your part of taking him to school. how are you suppose to know that he wasn't going! Obviously the judge hasn't got kids at that age or any kids at all!!! just stand up for what you believe in and don't back down!!!

Sarah - posted on 04/13/2009

I feel for you!  laws here are strict regarding that issue and last year i got a letter from my 11 year old's school saying if he missed one more day i would have to go to court.  in my case, though, i knew about all the absenses my son had.  it still stung cause its like "they" are making you out to be the bad parent when thats not the case at all!  if your son was lying to you, maybe the judge can make him do some community service to pay you back the fine you will pay?  and why dont schools call parents anymore?   when i was in school, they ALWAYS called to verify that i wasnt there that day.  if my son's school would have called me even once last year they would have known that he wasnt in school that day for sure instead of assuming wrong. 

if i were you, i would tell the judge point blank....you thought he was going to school, you didnt know he was leaving after you dropped him off or whatever.  accept the fine the judge will impose (cause he will do that anyways) and then ask him what you can do to change the situation.