My 11 year old and bad friends

Izelle - posted on 08/20/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My 11 year old daughter started playing with a group of friends at school and since then she changed completely. I can see that these kids uses her and she is such a soft person. They confinced her to start shaving and I only found out about this after she's done it. Her school work also suffers as she is used to make the top 10 in her grade and now that is not a priority anymore. She stopped talking to me and I feel helpless. She cries in the morning and says it's because she doesn't know if they will play with her and no one else wants to be friends with her. I am really in desperate need of some advise, I don't want to loose my daughter to these 11 year old brats!! Please help me!!!

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Emily - posted on 10/23/2012

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Sit down and talk to your daughter about it. Ask her she even likes being friends with them if they treat her so badly.



P.S. shaving isn't really that bad of a thing

Chaya - posted on 08/22/2012

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talk to the teachers, see if they have any ideas. I'd tell her to keep away from those children, but that isn't the solution if she feels alone.

Izelle - posted on 08/21/2012

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Hi Vicki
Thank you for the words of encouragement. I will keep up the conversations with her and I must just remember to stay positive and give her a chance to find herself. It just makes me sad to see her cry everyday and her worrying about the next day. She has very bad eczema and sometimes the flares ups are so bad. I know they tease her about it, but I always know she keeps her head up high, but at this age it becomes very difficult. I do know that she is a strong person, so it is just so sad to see her so unhappy. My husband made an appointment for us with the principal, he is a very good person and he absolutely hates bullies.

Once again thank you for your advice.
Izelle

Vicki - posted on 08/21/2012

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Hi Izelle,
It is very discouraging When you see your kids go down a diffrent plan then the one they were currently on. Is it possible to make a appointment with the school principal or even a guidance councellor? I do know that this can be very helpful. In the mean time you had a close relationship with her before these friends came into play keep trying with her, maybe ask her about what she likes in these girls? Someone once told me that kids are trying to discover who they are what they like who they like etc etc, they take on many diffrent paths and behavours it like trying on a new dress until you find the one that works. Rightnow she is befreinding girls who dont reflect who she is inside. She will figure that out and move on, in the meantime keep the conversation going keep communication going with you and her school.
Best of luck,

Vicki

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