My 11 year old is already talking about girls!!!

Syra - posted on 05/23/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Okay here's my issue, i have an 11 year old who is now in his first year of Junior high, and all i get out of him is constant talk about girls. When he does it i cant handle it-- i tell him slow down you have your whole life to think about girls, why dont you focus on your schooling and sports?? i understand that he has raging hormones at this age, but he's still only 11!!! I try to be understanding about it, i mean as much as a mom can be considering the circumstances, but when he carries on i find myself not liking it too much, i know he needs to talk about it, but i just don't really know what to think about all of this, and most of all how to respond..HELP!!!Am i handling this the right way? and if not any words of advice would be greatly appreciated...thank you

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Jessie - posted on 02/10/2013

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11, oh that's alright. Whats the big deal? He probably doesn't talk to his friends about girls all day, he'd be embarrassed. So he takes it home with him.

My advice is to get him a journal.

Hope this helped, good luck!

Sherri - posted on 05/25/2010

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Mine is 11 yr old boy and he is doing the same thing. He is never without adult supervision. Takes bus to and from school, does hw, has dinner, sports which we drive him to and stay for all games and bed as soon as we get home. We just try to explain he is much to young to consider dating. If he wishes to call a girl his girlfriend at school fine but he will not be seeing or talking to her once home as I can't control the school. He has a very long time to wait until dating will even be considered in this house 15 or 16 I am thinking. I think it really is very normal and I think you are handling in wonderfully.

Carol Ann - posted on 05/25/2010

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Hello Syra-

My 12 year old son also is experiencing those Raging Hormones. It's perfectly natural and it's normal. Some children begin puberty earlier than others. My advice to you is to always keep the doors of communication wide OPEN. Make sure he is comfortable enough to talk to you about everything. My son seems to be more comfortable talking to me about his sexuality than his Dad. His Dad is more conservative which is why i think he prefers chatting with me. Talk to him about what's going on with his body. Make sure he feels it's ok to feel the way he feels. There is a great book for kids to read about their changing bodies but for the life of me, I cant recall the title? Shout out anyone? Good luck to you both

Cheryl - posted on 05/24/2010

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I can't say I know exactly how you feel (my son is only 6, but I have a 14 year old daughter), but I can kind of relate. My suggestion is to have your son's dad talk to him, if that's possible. I plan on foisting the majority of my son's sex/females/etc talk off on my husband. I have 2 girls to deal with, so it's only fair. ;) If his dad isn't around, or you'd rather he not have a part in it for whatever reason, try to think of a male that you trust. In my case, I'd talk to one of my brothers about speaking w/ my son, but I'd let him know what I did & did not want my son to know at this time. It's good that your son wants to share things like that with you, but I would definitely teach him about respecting girls. I have already started this "training" with my 6 year old son. With my son, I have to say things like "I know when I was a girl, I always liked the boys that were nice to me & didn't hit me", etc (he's in kindergarten, so we're in the 'hit the girls you like' stage).
For some reason, kids don't really believe that they have their whole life ahead of them to do things. It's always 'gotta have it now, gotta do it now'. My daughter is the same way. I think all teenagers are that way & it's always the end of the world if they don't get to do/have whatever it is right this second. I know in my daughter's case, she thought that she could focus on boys & friends & that she'd have plenty of time to study & get good grades for college. She found out that I was right all along & now that she's about to start high school, wishes that she would have listened to me so that she'd have better study habits. She's working on that now, but it's hard on her because she's kind of set in her ways.
I don't know if I'm really helping you out here at all, but I saw that no one had responded yet & figured I'd give it a shot. Good luck!

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