my daughter is 12 and has very low self esteem can somebody give me advice

Lori - posted on 03/27/2010

The source of the low self esteem is very important. There's a million and one ways to boost her self esteem. I'm not saying stick acrylic nails on her but she's old enough for basic manicure, pedicure and even utilizing just a little bit of make up. At 12 years old, acne is often a concern amongst tweens/teens. If she's having a little breakout skin care. One recommendation that I make in regards to both skin care and make up is find a Mary Kay consultant in your area. It's a wonderful time to spend one on one time with your daughter and help her with skin care as Mary Kay does both skin care and make up. In saying that, I do not feel 12 yrs old is an appropriate age to wear make up on a daily basis. But with Easter ahead of you, I think on special occassions it's fine for a little make up. Not to mention a biggie amongst parents. It will teach (if she doesn't know already) your daughter how to appropriately apply make up. My mom did this with me and it's something I've done with my own 12 year old daughter. Aside from that it's a GREAT way to get some mother/daughter time. Another idea (if your daughter hasn't already) is a room makeover. Girls around 12 or 13 years old "grow out of" the childish setting such as charecter sheets and blankets and toys such as dolls. A room makeover could possiblly help in the situation. But anything to bring her self esteem back up.

Deanna - posted on 03/25/2010

Self esteem is so important to girls and coming from the stand point of someone who had none as a child I tried to instill it in my children. The one thing that I think is so important is to make sure that she knows that you are proud of her. One thing that i do is tell my girls in text messages that the are beautiful and i am proud of them and that they are the best kids in the
world. Now in doing this you will get a response of i know or no im not but in telling them this in ways that are unique and in the actions of every day life then they begin to believe it. Twelve year olds are hard to read though, so what you think is low self esteem may actually be someone who is trying to find her niche in school or in the neighborhood. The first thing you can do is try to talk to her and find out where she is at in life. Maybe she has had a bad day or week and is just feeling low.

Jenny - posted on 03/25/2010

hi i think alot of girls suffer with self esteem at some point in life just remind her that she is beutiful positive praise for things that she is good at but if she is getting bullied t is hard for her to take these things in if somebody elae is telling her different just reasure her that this is not the case people ususally say mean things if they are jealouse or have low self esteem thmselfs also let her know if theee was any point in your life that you felt the same so she relises that it is ok to feel like this ask her what can you do to help or make her feel better what is she insesure about maybe a new hair cut an outfit mum and daughter make over that always makes us feel good when we are low best of luck to you

Louwonder - posted on 03/14/2010

let her know that she has you and that she is so petty and know one could take that fr her

Terri - posted on 03/13/2010

thank you so much tracy

Tracy - posted on 03/13/2010

I feel that self-esteem is something you instill in your child from day one by caring for their physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. The more time you spend engaged with your child in activities, conversation, or just hanging out, the more self confidence they will have. I have a boy and a girl, and by far, my son was easier to instill self-confidence into. Boys believe everything you tell them about themselves. Girls, on the other hand, need you to keep telling them over and over that they are good, smart, strong, capable, pretty, etc. So whenever you get a chance, but without seeming like you are trying, tell her she looks pretty, or you like the way she handled herself in front of your company, or she was so smart to remember that she needed to work on a project over the weekend, or that her project is awesome! Make sure you and your husband are on the same page with this too. If she gets mixed messages from you and your significant other, then you basically cancel each other out.



Also, give her more responsibility, and ask her teacher at school to do the same. If she knows that you trust her to do a certain important task (age-appropriate of course), she will take pride in her work. Help her with her homework if she needs it so that her good grades will make her proud of her hard work. Hope these ideas help!