Stephanie - posted on 09/05/2011 ( 13 moms have responded )
I have been allowing my 13 year old daughter to choose her own bedtime for about four months. She has not had a problem getting up for school at 6am. It does not seem to be a problem, but my job entails me to talk to other parents in the evening and I see how they are doing a lot of things differently than I am,especially bedtime and mealtime. Other parents send their kids to bed anywhere from 6:45 to 8:30, and it must be a great struggle for them to get the kids in bed. I have peaceful evenings with out that argument. Also, because I work two evenings a week, and the girls (my other daughter is 11) have schedules, too, We do not have a set dinnertime, or a pre-planned menu. I often allow my girls to make whatever they want for dinner (usually a pasta dish.) Other parents have dinner exactly at 6pm, and refuse to talk on the phone at that time. DInner at my house is so informal that I think nothing of talking on the phone or studying (I am a grad student) or anything else I might need to get done. My daughters enjoy their space and freedom, and I enjoy a more peaceful relationship with them than what other parents have with their kids, but am I doing the right thing? Am I giving my kids the wrong idea about rules and authority by not setting and inforcing rules for the sake of the rules themselves?