What time should kids go to bed?

Juliette - posted on 12/31/2009

I have a eleven year old , only child and he goes to bed at 9pm , and on the weekends 10:30 since he doesnt have school the next day. He doesnt seem to be tired either. But if you would like some time to yourself at night I do recommend this.

Sandy - posted on 12/30/2009

What time should kids go to bed?

My 12 year old son gose to bed at 9pm on school night.10 is to late.

Laura - posted on 12/30/2009

Quoting Artriani:

after reading all these replies, it makes me wonder, am i a bad mom? or a too ignorance mom? what time SHOULD kids go to bed? Because both my kids, 12 & 8 go to bed at 10. That's the time when i tell them to go to bed, means they still have to do stuffs to get ready to bed, so they will be asleep at 10.30 or even 11 pm, almost every night on their school night. Their school's time is at 7 am, so they have to be ready for school at 6.30. Thank god i never have difficulties in waking them up, & they never complaint of lack of sleep or anything. I hope what i've been doing all these time to let them go to sleep too late, would not having any bad effects on them in the future. But these replies make me reconsidering my decision to let them stay up too late every night.

Thank goodness - I also was wondering - how bad of a mom am I? There is no way in the world I would get my 10 and 12 year old in bed at 8:30. I shoot for 9:30 but usually by the time we get through the nighttime stuff and they settle in for the night, it is closer to 10:00. they are well rested for school and don't have problems waking up, so I am not concerned about it.

Dora - posted on 12/30/2009

My experience based on my three children is that each individual child has different amount of sleep needs. There is no set rule on what time kids should go to bed. My eldest, a teenager, can function with less sleep for a day; my second teenager needs more sleep than bears going through hybernation and my 10 year old should be in bed by 9:00. This doesn't always happen but if he's in bed by 9:00, he's definitely a happier and better behaving child at school. I feel it's an individual schedule. Most kids will use their friends as the example of the time they should go to bed and as parents we can fall in that trap but we need to do what we think is best for our own child. I have a bedtime for my teenagers also. Between 10:00 and 10:30 max, they should be in their beds. They too complain that their friends are allowed to go to bed when they want.....my answer is: This is our home and that it their home and schedule. Accept it or go and live in their home with a new set of parents. They always back down and consider the positives they have at home.

Jaclyn - posted on 12/30/2009

My 10 year old stepson goes to bed at about 8:30 also. Sometimes it's a little earlier, and sometimes a little later. He is also ADHD, and being tired on top of that is bad news, so we try to keep it before 8:30. We see a family therapist and he told us that some kids need more sleep than others so you really have to set the bedtime for your own child. I'd do it in steps though if you decide to extend the time. Maybe start with saying be ready for bed at 8:30 and be in bed by 9 and see how that works out.
I definitely wouldn't jump to 9:30 or 10 right away, and definitely wouldn't let them set their own time. Kids need rules and like someone else said, they aren't old enough to care about how not getting enough rest will affect them - which is more than just mood and alertness in school.

Jennifer - posted on 12/29/2009

My 11 yo has an 830 bedtime, but she shares a room with her 2yo sib and a lot of times it is a fight with him until 9 so she really gets there around then. At this age they dont understand that they will have to have sleep to be alert in school

Ginny - posted on 12/29/2009

I was having the same problem determining what time kids should go to bed, but after months of trying different times, I find that sending him to bet at 9:30 and letting him read til 10 that he is getting enough sleep. I wake him for school at 7 and he seems to less grumpy than before...lol. Sometimes he's tired that he goes right to sleep at 9:30 anyway. They need at LEAST 8-9 hours to keep up with their growth spurts. Never allow them to set their own times. They are still children and they need rules to follow. It may not make you the popular mom, but hey, that's not why we became moms, right ? As for what his friends say, they are probably lying to "save face". Hope this helps......

Dawn - posted on 12/26/2009

my 11 yr old goes about 9 on a school night but stays up on friday and saturday till he wants to he usually wants to go to bed befor i have told him to or i say you can go watch the TV now till the programme finishes or the time i say and no TV the first surgestion usually works
but i think a lot depends on the child themself they are all so different
dawn x

Jennifer - posted on 12/21/2009

My son is 11 yrs old. He had a bed time of 8:30pm, and now he goes to bed at 9:00pm. I think that it really depends on the maturity level of the child, and what kind of upbringing they have had. We keep our son on a schedule. He is in bed by 9pm, and during school, he awakes at 6:45A, and is at school by 7:45A. He comes home at 3pm, and he has a snack, and takes the dog out. Then he will have somewhat of a cleared mind from school. He will sit down and do his homework, and will then be able to have his time for Karate on M, W, F. He will get home from that, take a shower, and has plenty of time for himself, and with the family. I would hope that this helps someone.

Cindy - posted on 12/21/2009

All kids are different, try different times and just watch how he is during the day, you will be able to tell if he's not getting enough sleep

Crissy - posted on 12/20/2009

My daughter who is 10 and my son who is 12 both go to bed at 8:30 every night and have since they were babies.....Kepp them on a scedual and life will be so much eaiser.

Kenitra - posted on 12/17/2009

Whatever you decide, have them in bed a half hour earlier, no tv, just reading or writing a letter or in their journal. Make this their "wind down" time.

Angela - posted on 12/14/2009

My 12 year old goes to bed at 9:00 pm.

Artriani - posted on 12/13/2009

after reading all these replies, it makes me wonder, am i a bad mom? or a too ignorance mom? what time SHOULD kids go to bed? Because both my kids, 12 & 8 go to bed at 10. That's the time when i tell them to go to bed, means they still have to do stuffs to get ready to bed, so they will be asleep at 10.30 or even 11 pm, almost every night on their school night. Their school's time is at 7 am, so they have to be ready for school at 6.30. Thank god i never have difficulties in waking them up, & they never complaint of lack of sleep or anything. I hope what i've been doing all these time to let them go to sleep too late, would not having any bad effects on them in the future. But these replies make me reconsidering my decision to let them stay up too late every night.

Linda - posted on 12/12/2009

My son is 10 and my daugther is 11. Their bedtime is 8:30. They don't always get to sleep then, they doddle at times and aren't in bed till 9. I don't think this is unreasonable. On weekends I let them stay up as late as they want sometimes or I make 11 the bedtime. My two oldest kids had the same bedtimes when they were young and it seems to have always worked fine for them.

Kelly - posted on 12/11/2009

to sarah fenwick if you feel that as a mother that your child should go to bed at 830 then thats what his bedtime should be now if he don't always fall asleep right away then get him a little lamp thats not bright just bright enough that he can read a book. tell him that his bed time is 830 but that he can have 15 minutes of reading time but he has to lay down and read his book and when his 15 minutes is up go in and tell him to but the book up and turn the lamp off and see how this works. reading calms and relaxs a person i read everynight before i go to sleep and i read to each of my children too this way i have mommy time with my children its very calming and relaxing hope this helps

Kelly - posted on 12/11/2009

this is for Sarah Boulet i know how you feel when you said that your 11year old tries to throw in "But my friends do this" let me tell you so does Abi but this is what i tell her and it might help you-- I tell her i am your mommy not your friends mommy if i was they would be following the same rules that you do but im not and their mommy has different rules than i do but you know i love you and i have these rules because of that reason and also so all of my babies including you have to follow the same rules. You of course can shorten it or say it however you want i have 5 children so i say it to were Abi understands fully what i am talking about

Sandra - posted on 12/07/2009

I have an 11yr old and he starts getting ready for bed at 9:30 and by 10 he is in bed.
He gets up at 7:15 and i have noproblem with him getting up in the morning .

Lily - posted on 12/07/2009

hi sarah i have a 11yr old daughter who constantly goes to bed late , i having the same trouble as you it's not that you need them to sleep at at reasonable time it's also you need a break it's your time mum's time alone . also she does give me a hard time getting in the mornings doesn't want to go to school complains very tired or i have a sore throat any excuse because really she's just tired lack of sleep . i guess my in my case i have the pay t.v she loves disney channel very hooked on it , it's very annoying i struggle with this. but i warned her next year your to sleep at a reasonable time like maybe at 9pm that's alright but not at 10pm or 10.30 pm. or i'll take pay t.v off she's worried now i hope it works. but it also depends can your child get up in the morning some can and some can't. i had to sleep 8.30 when i was young parents were strict that way. set limits with him and tell your friends are not my children so i don't care what they do your my child and i worry it's not good for your health your not getting enough sleep . take care sarah

Sarah - posted on 12/07/2009

my 11yr old daughters bed time is also 8:30 somtimes 9 on a school night.
Shes tried getting me to let her stay up to 10 saying all her friends do so I made a compromise...in the bedroom by bedtime and you could stay awake untill 10 and by 9:30 shes always passes out

KATHY JO - posted on 12/07/2009

TO EACH HIS/HER OWN OPINION--I THINK THAT YOU ARE DOING RIGHT BY 8:30PM. MY 15 YEAR OLD GOES TO BED @ 10PM. MY ADULT CHILDREN HAVE CURFEWS AND THEY ARE 21 AND 19. WHEN THEY WERE YOUNGER THEY WENT TO BED @ 8:30PM. NO QUESTIONS ASK. GAVE THEM A SNACK BEFORE BED THEN LIGHTS OUT.

Kia - posted on 12/06/2009

It really depends on when they need to get up. an 11 yo who doesnt need to be up till 9am can stay up later. my 11yo got to bed at 9:30 because any earlier she wouldn't be ready, between getting home from school, homework and extra curriculars dinner isnt till 7:30 or 8 some nights so a 8:30pm bedtime would leave no time for anything.

Count back 8-10 hours from wake up time to figure the best bedtime.

Kelly - posted on 12/06/2009

i have 5 children and they are 10 months 2years 4years 6years and 11years in our home betime is the same time for all the kids and bedtime is at 830 everynight even on weekends and during the summer even when there is no school if you think about it they wake up early and are up all day when you put them to bed at 830 you then have time to straighten up your home and some one on one time with your spouse were you can just enjoy each others company

Kerry - posted on 11/29/2009

they do need sleep my 13 yr old goes to bed at 9.30 but he sometimes goes by himself.my 11 yrs old 9.00 it takes him forever to get to sleep.but its always been like that .they do need rest .kerry

Laura - posted on 11/29/2009

I have a 12 year old son, and shower time is 8:30, bed by 9 and lights out at 9:30. This gives him some reading time in bed to unwind. He's well rested and up and ready roll at 7 am.

Sarah - posted on 11/29/2009

thanks that is true he never falls straight to sleep when i send him at 8.30 so think it might need to change.

Michelle - posted on 11/28/2009

We homeschool so we do not have to be up as early so my kids are allowed to stay up until 11 and get up at 8. On weekends and holidays they stay up as late as they like as long as they stay in their room after 11. Oh my kids are 10 and 14. If you child is falling asleep at 830 then that it a good bedtime If however they are laying awake for an hour or more it might be time to reevaluate it.

Karen - posted on 11/28/2009

It really depends on how much sleep your child needs. Some people let their kids stay up until they drop and some make them go to bed at a decent hour. I have my 10 year old go to bed anywhere between 8:30 and 9:00, however she gets to read until she is ready to go to sleep. She is generally asleep by 9:30. Occassionaly she is still up at 10:00, if so I turn lights out. On the weekends, unless we have something planned for the next days I will let her step up until10pm for sure. Take care!

Oulie - posted on 11/28/2009

I have 3 kids, from 10 to 14 and they all go to bed at 9. I always get from my 14 yr daughter " well all my friends get to stay up till 10 or 11, My reply to her is Well im not their mom and your going to bed at 9" and the 10 yr old normaly goes o bed earlier than that on her own. So i guess all kids need a different amount of sleep for their bodies.

Sarah - posted on 11/26/2009

thanks everyone i feel better now that 8.30 is ok for a 11yr old and im not the only mum!

Diana - posted on 11/25/2009

Mine went to bed at 8:30 until they were 13 then it went to 9:00. It didn't go up again until 16 to 10:00 ...every now and then they may get to stay up later for something special.

Charlene - posted on 11/25/2009

I think 8:30 is good or 9.my son goes to bed at 8:30 a few nights and 9 some nights.He is twelve.If they can't wake up in the morning they need more sleep.I tell my son if he wants to stay up to 9:30 once in a while on a school night and he gives me a hard time about getting up its over.On the weekends he stay up till 10 but not ever anytime he wants.every child is different with how much sleep they need ,my son needs at least 9 used to be 11 hours.He is so tall that the doctor had said when he is growing he requires more sleep.Also when he has a growing spurt he eats alot!hope this helps.

Melanie - posted on 11/25/2009

My 11 year old also goes to bed at 8:3o. In my opinion 10:00 is way to late. I think that 9:00 is a good one. They only reason my son still has a 8:30 bedtime is because I left it to him to earn a 9:00 bedtime and he hasn't yet.

Klara - posted on 07/07/2011

I personally think different people need different amounts of sleep. What time children should go to bed depends also on what time they have to get up. Our girls go to bed at 8pm, but our older one is allowed to read and/or do homework for about an hr. before lights out. If a child functions well on 8-9 hrs. great. If a child doesn't do well w/o 11 hrs., then things need to be adjusted. I would ask your pediatrician and set the bedtime according to sleep needs, NOT what everyone else does.

Tasha - posted on 06/27/2011

yea idk what time children should go to bed

Suzanne - posted on 01/11/2010

I have two boys, 10 and soon to be 13. Bedtime for them both is 8:30pm because they share a room. We start the process at 8pm and more nights than not they are fully asleep by 9pm. Most mornings they are up at 6am, on their own, ready to take on the day. There are times they'll sleep in and I have to wake them at 7am to get ready for school. So I think the bedtime is working for their bodies, minds and soul. We've figured out what time our kids should go to bed. They can stay up as late as they want to on the weekends...rule is they have to keep it quiet after 10pm and turn off anything left on before falling asleep. Usually they'll both be asleep by 11pm. I like the earlier bedtime not only for what it does for the boys, but also that it gives me and hubby at least an hour of uninterrupted time together.

Sandy - posted on 12/30/2009

What time should kids go to bed?

My 12 year old son gose to bed at 9pm on school night.10 is to late.

Laura - posted on 12/30/2009

Quoting Artriani:

after reading all these replies, it makes me wonder, am i a bad mom? or a too ignorance mom? what time SHOULD kids go to bed? Because both my kids, 12 & 8 go to bed at 10. That's the time when i tell them to go to bed, means they still have to do stuffs to get ready to bed, so they will be asleep at 10.30 or even 11 pm, almost every night on their school night. Their school's time is at 7 am, so they have to be ready for school at 6.30. Thank god i never have difficulties in waking them up, & they never complaint of lack of sleep or anything. I hope what i've been doing all these time to let them go to sleep too late, would not having any bad effects on them in the future. But these replies make me reconsidering my decision to let them stay up too late every night.

Thank goodness - I also was wondering - how bad of a mom am I? There is no way in the world I would get my 10 and 12 year old in bed at 8:30. I shoot for 9:30 but usually by the time we get through the nighttime stuff and they settle in for the night, it is closer to 10:00. they are well rested for school and don't have problems waking up, so I am not concerned about it.

Dora - posted on 12/30/2009

My experience based on my three children is that each individual child has different amount of sleep needs. There is no set rule on what time kids should go to bed. My eldest, a teenager, can function with less sleep for a day; my second teenager needs more sleep than bears going through hybernation and my 10 year old should be in bed by 9:00. This doesn't always happen but if he's in bed by 9:00, he's definitely a happier and better behaving child at school. I feel it's an individual schedule. Most kids will use their friends as the example of the time they should go to bed and as parents we can fall in that trap but we need to do what we think is best for our own child. I have a bedtime for my teenagers also. Between 10:00 and 10:30 max, they should be in their beds. They too complain that their friends are allowed to go to bed when they want.....my answer is: This is our home and that it their home and schedule. Accept it or go and live in their home with a new set of parents. They always back down and consider the positives they have at home.

Ginny - posted on 12/29/2009

I was having the same problem determining what time kids should go to bed, but after months of trying different times, I find that sending him to bet at 9:30 and letting him read til 10 that he is getting enough sleep. I wake him for school at 7 and he seems to less grumpy than before...lol. Sometimes he's tired that he goes right to sleep at 9:30 anyway. They need at LEAST 8-9 hours to keep up with their growth spurts. Never allow them to set their own times. They are still children and they need rules to follow. It may not make you the popular mom, but hey, that's not why we became moms, right ? As for what his friends say, they are probably lying to "save face". Hope this helps......

Artriani - posted on 12/13/2009

after reading all these replies, it makes me wonder, am i a bad mom? or a too ignorance mom? what time SHOULD kids go to bed? Because both my kids, 12 & 8 go to bed at 10. That's the time when i tell them to go to bed, means they still have to do stuffs to get ready to bed, so they will be asleep at 10.30 or even 11 pm, almost every night on their school night. Their school's time is at 7 am, so they have to be ready for school at 6.30. Thank god i never have difficulties in waking them up, & they never complaint of lack of sleep or anything. I hope what i've been doing all these time to let them go to sleep too late, would not having any bad effects on them in the future. But these replies make me reconsidering my decision to let them stay up too late every night.