why is my 10 year old stealing money from his dad

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Teresa - posted on 05/09/2012

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Hi, Geraldine, first dont panic! there are other parents I am sure who have been in simular circumstances with their children. There are many reasons why children steal, and sometimes there could be underlying reasons behind it, maybe he is looking for more attention, or feels he is unable to buy the things he wants, or even pressure from friends to show he can keep up with what they have. In some cases a stressful situation at home may be a trigger to his behaviour.
Like I said the best thing is not to panic, however it must be made clear that this behaviour is not exceptable in your home, I would suggest he replace the money he has taken by either doing extra chores for his Dad, like washing his Car cleaning out the Garage ,helping in the garden to pay back what he has taken. Give him the chance to explain why he has taken the money and stay calm as possible, dont set up any traps to catch him out, as this will give him trust issues with you later. Your not doing anything wrong and I feel confident with support and strong boundaries and consequences, he will come to understand his behaviour is not exceptable, and it is worth while doing extra chores for extra poket money rather than taking it! Good Luck and llet me know if everything works out.

Lisa - posted on 05/08/2012

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Is there something that he wants perhaps that he doesn't have? Is he doing it for attention that he feels he's just not getting? I myself am dealing with the stealing issue although it is not money from us its from her teachers at school. I have talked to her about it and she says its because she wanted it and knew we wouldn't buy her it because she didn't need it. To answer her I said well if you don't need it then why would you steal it? She had no answer. I went over the repurcussions of what stealing will lead to if it continues and made her write a letter of apology to her teacher, and then made her miss recess for a week to boot. She has not stolen since.

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