6 year old girls!!

Jessica - posted on 09/16/2011

I have a 6 year old step daughter, and I don't understand it but it seems like NO PUNISHMENT out there gets to her. Time out's don't work, Spanking doesn't work, Taking things from her doesn't work cause the next day she's back to doing whatever you punished her for the day before. We live in an apartment complex and I told her that if she would come straight home when the bus got here, I would allow her to walk to the house alone (needless to say I see when the bus gets here, I know how long it takes her to walk it etc.) But I've had to get on to her numerous times because she would stand up there and talk to this little girl (this girl is in her class and also rides the same bus home) - What is there possibly to talk about? After spending the whole day together? She lies about things that if she would tell the truth wouldn't get in trouble. She talks a lot in school (got a note this week in the agenda about it) But no matter what we do it just doesn't seem to get better. I'm 23 years old been dealing with her for 4 years progressively getting worse and I'm about to pull my hair out and feel like I just want to give up. Please help?



And she can't remember anything! You ask her what she did in school that day and the only thing she can tell you is that she ate lunch, went outside and played and it's like the rest of the day is a complete blur & that's the way it is at home when you tell her to do something, she'll walk in her room and it's like shes completely forgot what you told her to do. You can punish her and the 10 minutes later she's the same way.

Rashida - posted on 08/12/2009

yes yes yes!! i am with you, My daughter is 7 and honey i don't were she gets it. I feel that everthing i say no to she needs to know why, and its always "but mom" i say no again, she goes"but mom" . it's a never ending battle with her. I never thought i had to explain myself to a seven year old.

Karen - posted on 05/19/2009

My little girl 6 november,and she so angry all the time....

She never litens to me and my little boy whos a year older asks me,why dose teagan never do as her told and I do everything...

I feel so bad,i asked them to do the same things and callum finishes within secs,teagan off on some mistic adventure in her head,and forgotten what I told her.

Talk about dreamer....



karen

Clair - posted on 03/26/2009

my 6 yr old is a major drama queen and very mouthy sometimes at the moment im a loser lol her baby sister poked her today and anyone wouldv thought shed broken a bone , my 7 yr old on other hand ahs taken it to a new level i get door slamming throwing things screaming etc

Lauren - posted on 03/22/2009

I have a 6 yo girl, who is the youngest of six children with the oldest going on 20 in April. My daughter is mature beyond her years and while we won't tolerate too much disrespect, she does get away with some bouts of freshness. I think it's because we are too tired to do anything about it. I also think I let her get away with stuff because she is just tooooo cute. Not good is it??? Honestly, she does know when we not going to tolerate it any longer and she knocks it off. She is very sassy to her 15 yo brother who secretly adores her, but pokes fun at her constantly. I do enjoy her comebacks at him. They are very original.

Rosina - posted on 03/20/2009

I'm so glad like all of you that now I know i'm not alone in the battle of the 6yr old!!! Like many of you I also thought I was being a mean mum which is why she talks to me and her dad the way she does. The attitude is unbeliveable it's like she's a proper teenager!!!

Audra - posted on 03/11/2009

Thank god that there are other people going through this and not just me!!!!  I too, thought that i was a horrible mom...and that I must have done something to cause the attitude, and everything that goes with it!  It's nice to know that I'm not alone

Bobbi - posted on 02/19/2009

I swear when mine could start talking the attitude started! My daughters will be 7 (twins) in september and kindergarten has brought out the worst attitude. They are picking up all kinds of bad behavior. I have to keep them in check, the naughty corner has worked really well for us.

Hannah - posted on 02/05/2009

As much as I love my daughter, she can be rather mouthy now. I get "whatevers" and eye-rolls from time-to-time. Of course, I do not let these fly. She knows what she's doing isn't good, but she just can't seem to stop herself from getting sassy. Sigh. And dressing up has now become a battle. She told me one time, "Mama, why do you pick my clothes? It's my body." I gotta admit, she has a point there. I shudder to think what she'll be like when she hits her teens. I just keep talking to her...and I pray that will guide her to the right direction.

Shawna - posted on 02/03/2009

I have the same problem! She hit first grade & thought she was a grown up! She says she's to big to play with toys & she can do everything by herself.

Let's not mention the attitude!
Cant wait until my sweet angel comes back! Oh yeah, but then she'll be a teenager & really hate me! lol

Marcia - posted on 02/03/2009

Oh my gosh ! After raising 2 boys to adult hood, and one son thats now almost 9, I was NOT prepared for the difference, in the boys and girls things...holy crap! I tell people that if I had my daughter first, She wouldve been my ONLY child. It's not that she's a bad kid, because she really is a darling, but its whole different attitude, on both her part and on mine...maybe since I am older now, I am just too tired of it....lol

All these posts describe my daughter, plus she suffers from the "princess" syndrome (those with children with this, know what I am talking about). It works well to my advantage at time thought, because I would tell her that a true princess would NEVER act that way...lol

She is much more fun, but emotionally much more work :)

Holly - posted on 02/01/2009

it's a growing time for all. my daughters are 26 months apart. I noticed a change in their relationship when my eldest daughter was in first grade. my sons are 36 months apart, and i've noticed a similar change in the relationship between my youngest son and his older brother, since the youngest started kindergarten this year. Don't take it personally. They are starting to realize that there is a "whole new world" out there beyond the families, who love for them unconditionally.

Lisa - posted on 01/30/2009

Yes. I know exactly what you are talking about. However, I think my girl has been over the top emotional since she started talking. I love the passion, hate that it does not take much to make her upset. There are days I can do nothing right, and it takes its toll. Her Daddy has started letting her know when she is out of line, which has helped.

Debbie - posted on 01/28/2009

well i've read a couple of ur responses and my daughter is getting mouthy, but she knows how far to take it.  she also is getting into a lot of lieing and hiding things, its hard to deal with but you have to do whatever works, whatever they respond to the best, i find that if i take things away from her she straightens up, she looooves the disney channel, she will cry herself to sleep if i take it away, that usually works for me, since mines is a hannah montana fan

Sonya - posted on 01/27/2009

my god are you all talking about my 6yr old!!!! she is mouthy aggresive to her sister(sometimes) disrespective to me,her dad, nan and grandad and a royal pain in the butt, it started when she was about 3ish, she used to be a sweet loveing kid, now god help me if she is to make it to her 7th birthay next month!!!  she can also be totaly fantastic with younger kids, she is great at helping her younger sis with school stuff its just her 0lder sis she cant get on with, but when she is at school; they all think she is fab, always helpful and polite tides up, (which she does do at home to when the need suits ) no offense to blondes but at the mo she is a typical blonde who flutters the long lashes at teachers and smiles lots and flashes her big baby blue eyes at them, how can i get that child at home aswell??? dont get me wrong id rather she was good at school and not so good for me but sometimes it would be nice to have this other child that the school tell me about at parents evenings every now and then lol

im from uk by the way :-)

Carrie Anne - posted on 01/27/2009

wow, I'm like Jen, I've been seconded guessing what I've been doing with my daughter because of her new found personality. Good to know it's not all me :-) I have heard that when kids start school (grade 1 is the first level that's all day) they're exhausted when they get home from not only school but from being on their best (or better) behaviour. Home is their safe zone so they feel it's okay to let their guard down and emotions out. Reactions may be from something that happened during the day and not really because my daughter has a blue glass instead of a pink one. It doesn't fix things, but it helps me to understand a little better. By not over-reacting myself to my daughter Verity, I find the problem gets resolved quicker.

The 1,2,3 timeout sometimes works. It removes Verity and she calms down. Then we can usually talk about what's happened. Don't get me wrong, that doesn't always work. Not getting time on Webkinz (her new love) sometimes helps to keep her better behaved.

Someone told me once that your kids traits that drive you nuts will be ones you appreciate in them as adults. That's probably true (independent thinking and questioning authority), but adulthood is far away and I don't know if I can be so understanding for that many years :-)

Rosie - posted on 01/27/2009

Quoting Tracey:

yes hun my daughter is just like that its like listenin to myself readin ur thread hun lol mine is so mouthy and loves to tell every1 no knoiw matter what it is........ when i tell her off she crys for hrs and then says its cause she dont like gettin told off lol xxxxx

Hi tracey

I get that! When i have to tell my 6 yr old off, she starts crying. When i ask her what she's crying for, she says she doesnt like being told off...so i tell her that if she hadnt been naughty, she wouldnt have been told off and she wouldnt be crying lol Oh i'm a harsh mummy PMSL!

Rosie - posted on 01/27/2009

oh i know what you mean!! My sweet little 6 yr old girl gets 'body snatched' quite regularly by some other being who looks like her, sounds like her but has the attitude of a teenager!  Ask her to do something and its ' i'm busy' or ' in a minute'...i'm like ' er...who am i again? Last time i looked i was still mum!' Also independant just doesnt describe it! She's like ' i dont want your help mum' even if i see her struggling to brush her very long hair. Also she asks me questions, i give her an answer, she thinks about it for a min and then says ' no mum you're wrong'.....so why ask me in the first place then!!! lol

Other than that, she's gorgeous and i love her to bits! lol

Tracey - posted on 01/26/2009

yes hun my daughter is just like that its like listenin to myself readin ur thread hun lol mine is so mouthy and loves to tell every1 no knoiw matter what it is........ when i tell her off she crys for hrs and then says its cause she dont like gettin told off lol xxxxx

Laura - posted on 01/25/2009

I was having trouble with my almost 6 year old, and then I read the book: You Can't Make Me (But I Can Be Persuaded): Strategies for Bringing Out the Best in Your Strong-Willed Child. This book seemed to help with her and her behaviors that I could not correct or help her deal with. A coworker suggested this book after it helped with her daughter. Hope it helps you. Mine is still far from perfect, but much better.

Amy - posted on 11/16/2008

Hey all! I have a son who is 6 and of course, boys aren't as moody as girls. But as a mom with a now 10 year old daughter maybe I can help. The moody thing doesn't end but it does get better as you both learn how to control it more. My best advice would be to not allow her moods to control or change your discipline or behavior consequences.

We have used the color discipline chart, we have used time outs and spanking. Each one is different for each child. Katie responded well to the discipline chart when she was 6 but now, time out is the thing that works. Hunter on the other hand, has to have a spanking to get the point across. David, my 8 year old, changes with each passing day. He is my total challenge.

Kristy - posted on 11/03/2008

I'm glad to hear that it isn't just me too!! Hopefully as we figure things out we can share what our experiences are! I am just crossing my fingers that this stage goes by quickly!!

Jen - posted on 11/01/2008

I am SO glad to hear that this must be a stage because I was REALLY beginning to wonder if I was just a horrible mom or something. My daughter also can go from happy to the world is ending in a matter of seconds... We have tried time outs, taking away toys, even going the other direction and have her work towards something she really wants and they all work to a point and then another emotional breakdown happens. If I didn't know that she was only 6 I would swear she has PMS... Ha! Anyways, thanks for the postings...

Kristy - posted on 11/01/2008

I hear ya on the emotional part holy cow, I know we are girls but come on, she goes from happy to sad/mad in a second it is so frustrating and if she doesn't like a choice I have made for her she just won't talk to me... I hate the ignoring game!!! I thought about the chart thing too but she seemed so "I don't care" about it that I wasn't sure if it would even work! Maybe I will try that... I tried the 3 strikes rules where if she got 3 strikes she couldn't have "fun" time on the weekend that didn't work at all she didn't even care!!

Jolie - posted on 10/28/2008

Well, it has started here at my house in Kindergarten. I get the "Oh, Mom" and eye rolls. But, we use a discipline chart like they do at school (green, yellow, orange, red) and that seems to have helped. All I have to say now is "watch your mouth or I will move you to Yellow (or orange)" There is no REAL consequence to it yet, just the threat seems to have helped.

Jen - posted on 10/27/2008

I feel the same way... my daughter is 6 going on 16... If I get one more "Whatever" I am going to go nuts... I love the fact that she is older and can have more responsibility and interested in new things but I also want to teach her to be respectful. She is also very emotional and moody these days... SO any new ideas would be great!!