5 year old Boy, really acting up and pushing all buttons.....

Codi - posted on 05/04/2013

my son acting up at home but not at school he lieing to me all the time and now started to steal from me and his dad and his grandparents when he goes over there he is 5 years old and i displine him and it doesnt work and goes back in the same acting up and then started want to raise his fist at his sister who is 4 years old im going crazy he wont listen nor act right i dont know what to do anymore would like adive too

Karen - posted on 04/13/2010

Hi, I am going through the same with my son (dec 04) - I believe it is as mentioned previously, just his age (though I hate to admit it)! What I have found works for us is spending one on one time with him - hard I know when you work and have other children, but if you could find a baby sitter for a couple of hours a week for your other kids and do something he wants to do. I also find tough love helps - not everyone agrees or thinks it appropriate but when my son took his sister out of our street and she went on the road (albeit a small cul-de-sac - but not the point) I explained how if she had been hit by a car she could die and what would happen if a bad man took one of them - it terrified the life out of him until he cried which I hated to see - but you know what? It worked! I hope you find something that works for you - I have by no means got things sorted here but the two instances I mentioned above are just a couple of ideas. x

Celeste - posted on 04/11/2010

thanks so much ladies for all your advise!! The chart I had mentioned is basically the same type of system and more behaviour then chores, it was working great! he loved to work for the reward. Lately he does not care to try. Will keep pushing through - thanks. Yes I also know I am in for some more stages to come later on, I fear my sweet little girl will give the most trouble in those pre-teen years!

Kathy - posted on 04/07/2010

Mandy, Great system i used a chart some what like your when my 22 yr old son was younger worked well...

Mandy - posted on 04/07/2010

The thing that works for my son is sleep. We started a behavior chart where he had 5 rules, be respectful, share with siblings, be obedient, be honest, and good attitude. We gave him checks for every offense. If he got no checks, he could stay up later (8PM). If he got 3 or 4 checks, bedtime was moved 15 minutes earlier, 5 checks and bedtime was 30 minutes earlier. This really worked for us. Most days he would get checks. He would also get a consequence for the behavior. If he was disrespectful, he would get an extra chore like pulling weeds, scrubbing the floor, etc. The chart has worked for us. He is now on a no warning system since he is pretty good most days now. If he is disrespectful, whining, etc, he goes to bed early, no warning now. He is also playing soccer to get the extra energy out. Hope you find a system that works for you.

Kathy - posted on 04/06/2010

Hi Girls I have a 5 yr old son as well not acting up in school just has attention proplems but does all the other things you have mentioned about your son, Celeste I have 3 other grown kids that where 5 too... And I hate to say it but it's normal my older ones grew out of it you just have to be firm this is a hard age they are testing there bountrys they know more than you just stick to your guns and if the chart rewards thing hasen't worked yet try something new take a fun thing that he loves to do away like tv, video games have a toy jail just keep taking them away put it in a box keep adding to it and as he starts to behave he can earn one back.... school is seperate i have a treat bag with candy in it and if the teacher gives him a sticker for that day(i provide from the 99 cent store)he gets to reach in the bag and take one remember this a reward so this should be the only time he gets candy and at the end of the week if he has gotten a sticker everyday he gets a ice cream from Mcdonalds or a happy meal you can use whatever works for you.... hang in there this will pass stay strong you are going to need it becouse there are more mild stones to come some good some not so much.... Good Luck

Susanna - posted on 04/06/2010

Thank God I am not alone...my son acts up at school andhome so feel fortunate there...the school suggested an anger mangement therapist. She came to our house and spoke to my husband and myself then my son...turns out we need couseling to learn how to communicate with each other because the way we comminicate is how he communicates...she also suggested a group session for my son to help him understand how deal with his emotions. She told my son the rules of behavior...since it was not someone he is in contact with but an adult authority he listened...hasn't pushed anyone in school for about a month now...

Megan - posted on 04/06/2010

I know THAT feeling! All apart from acting up at school. (for some reason he behaves there) I feel that i have exhausted all my best tactics, rewards and punishments. The only thing i can imagine that may be irritating him, is he has a 1 year old sister. He loves her dearly and most of the time is so good to her. Me on the other hand... Sorry i can't offer you any advice, just a fellow passenger in the same boat!