Some things you never thought you would say

Laura Zoey - posted on 08/18/2011

Jane my brother would pee in his trash can in night time too! Lol, well I guess he was justified in doing it since my dad would lock him in his room at night.........

"we are going to buy me diapers!"
In preparation for fierna's birth

Jane - posted on 08/17/2011

Don't pee in the trash can! Or in your closet.

Kirby - posted on 08/17/2011

"thats a bed, NOT a trampoline"
"no you cant drink my coffee"
"very artistic..... no please help me clean off the walls!!"
"get off the vacuum cleaner!!"
"why are you naked??" (at midnight, pj's mysteriously disappear, along with nappies filled with poo....)

Lin - posted on 08/17/2011

"Dear God, for the love of all things sacred, let's watch Barney."

Katherine - posted on 08/17/2011

"The dog's tail is not a toy"
"Let me poop in peace!"
"Don't sass me."
"No you can't go back to bed at 8am."

Katherine - posted on 08/17/2011

"If you don't stop you're never leaving the house again."

Lin - posted on 08/17/2011

"You're very cuddly today.....are you sick?"

"That is not a hat." In reference to used diapers, bowls, cups, etc.

"No you can't have a pet ant. Go pout with Daddy."

Glenrose - posted on 08/17/2011

please stop picking your nose with your finger then put it in your mouth

Carolee - posted on 08/17/2011

"Why would he do that... TWICE?" In reference to my cousin's youngest grabbing a Christmas ornament and biting it like an apple... twice... even after it had cut his mouth up the first time.

Kirby - posted on 08/17/2011

Never thought I'd be saying this to my two year old son, but I had to the other day..
"TOM - take off mummy's bra!!"

At least i have a photo of him wearing it, perfect to show off on his 18th birthday LOL :)

Constance - posted on 08/16/2011

This one is famous from all my kids. Aww man I don't want another brother/sister can we give them back? WHy did you get pregnant with a gross brother/sister?

I simply respond, Sorry I don't get to pick but Daddy does it is his fault.

KIds," Daddy why do you have to mess up my life?
My husband always looks so confused then the tell him it is his fault for giving another brither/sister.

My husband always ends up coming to me and saying. "Thanks Babe now I have to hear this until they find simthimg to blame on me."

OOps did I do that?

Jane - posted on 08/16/2011

Don't break the house!

Don't break the car!

Don't break the window!

Don't break the couch!

Don't break your sister!

Just...don't!



When talking to the plumber:

So that's where all the Legos went!



Please don't wash your xBox!



No, the VCR isn't hungry. YOU need to eat your sandwich.

Stifler's - posted on 08/16/2011

HAHAHAHAHA!

Jodi - posted on 08/16/2011

And on the tampon thing, I keep a pack of panty liners in the glove box of the car, just in case. My daughter found them the other day when we were sitting in the car with the windows down watching my son's football, and she yells at the top of her voice "Mummy, why do you have nappies in the car?"



Edited to add, she had pulled some out of the pack and was waving them around.

Jodi - posted on 08/16/2011

Speaking of toe nails "stop chewing your toe nails!!!"

Stifler's - posted on 08/16/2011

I never thought I'd have to stop someone from eating a tampon either.

Katharine - posted on 08/16/2011

I never thought I say this 'no your hand doesn't belong under my shirt' I say this to my 3 year old son Austin everyday.

Laura Zoey - posted on 08/16/2011

I never thought I'd say 'if you let me cut your toe nails I'll give you chocolate!'

'no the dog does NOT need you to put a diaper on her!'

'No honey daddy has no milk in his boobs' :/

'go lay done in your bed and suck your thumb!'

Laura Zoey - posted on 08/16/2011

Yeah I understand bringing the baby into the bathroom with me but then Eric comes in too, of course the dog and two cats follow too, the cats circle my undies like thanks I really wanted hair in my under ware! And yes the dog does have that look like you better not poop in my drinking bowl!

Danielle - posted on 08/15/2011

No, Paris the goat can NOT come inside!
Logan, please do not give strangers a tour of the house. They do not need to see where you sleep!
I have a million of them lol.
I thought I was the only one that got followed to the bathroom! I have to sneak to go alone. Let one catch wind that I'm in there and they ALL follow! Paris will sit on the tub and talk 90 to nothing, the cat HAS to sit on my lap, the dog sits there and stares at me like hey! You better not poop in my water bowl! And my oldest sits outside the bathroom. If I lock the door, then Paris beats on it while Lola (the dog) scratches on it and when I finally open the door all four of them come rushing in like they've missed something =/

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/15/2011

Yeah, that is a discussion for much later....I tell my son....momma need privacy..usually that buys me enough time to take care of my monthlies.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/15/2011

Here is another good one..

"how did you get food stuck there?" (on the child or elsewhere in the house)

Katherine - posted on 08/15/2011

It's like if you weren't in the flippin bathroom with me you wouldn't SEE me bleeeding from there.
So I say, "Mommy bleeds just because."

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/15/2011

BAHAHAHAHAHA...Katherine that is a good one.

Katherine - posted on 08/15/2011

Oh! The BEST: Why are you bleeeeding from there?"

Emma - posted on 08/15/2011

Tara

Ive had the poo is not paint one.

And no mommy is not wearing a nappies its a sanitary towel.

And not to forget Why dose your wardrobe smell of poo

Kirby - posted on 08/15/2011

"Ummmm... Tom, sweetie.... I'm not sure that's edible....."

Tara - posted on 08/15/2011

Emma, I hear you on the bathroom time, at home, at a store, pretty much anywhere it's Mama I want to come in with you.

My favorites so far are: No Mattea, a tampon is not to eat. (Still in the package, yay!)
No, poop is not paint.
Don't put your wet diaper on your head.
and
No, Daddy does NOT have a vulva.

Katherine - posted on 08/14/2011

Aww that's cute :)

Carolee - posted on 08/14/2011

Stop eating the banana with the (toy) pliers.

I've recently had to explain to Corbin that babies eat FROM their mommies... they don't ACTUALLY eat their mommies! He saw my sister breastfeeding her newborn and got extremely concerned. lol.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

Isn't that terrible? Trying to have an adult conversation, and start talking to people like they are toddlers. I need to get out more so my brain isn't oatmeal. I don't get enough adult interaction...this is my main source of adult entertainment....*sigh* sad but true.

Katherine - posted on 08/14/2011

LOL, me too.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

This is definitely a slip up of mine when I am with adults...no children even around...

I have to go use the potty.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

WOW! Guess we are going through a lot of the same wonderful trials and tribulations ;)

Katherine - posted on 08/14/2011

5 and 2

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

Please stop putting your straw up your nose and attempting to drink through it.

"Could you stop dragging the cat by the tail? I am pretty sure her screaming means she doesn't like it" responce? "no momma, she likes it....that is called purring!"

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

My son is 5 and daughter is 16 months. Yours?

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

Oh for fucks sake Katherine. It is literally my only time alone...the cat is drinking from the faucet, my son has to come in and of course talk to me, or he will ask..."momma I want to be with you....can I come in?" And of course.......if he comes in.,,..sister is throwing a huge fit at the door....she has to come in too!

Katherine - posted on 08/14/2011

How old are your kids Marina? Sound like the same age as mine.

Katherine - posted on 08/14/2011

Apparently yes, everyone including the damn dog must be in the bathroom while mommy poops.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

Stop smelling your sisters butt, it has poop in the daiper!

You are 5 years old, you really want me to put a diaper on you like your sister?? Ok....

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2011

Must EVERYONE be in the bathroom when mommy poops? I promise, no one is missing out!

Katherine - posted on 08/14/2011

"Get your HAND out of the toilet."
"Don't drink the bath water."
"Did you really just POOP in the tub?"
"Did you really just PEE in the tub?"
"Don't drink the fucking tub water your sister just peed in it!"

Constance - posted on 08/14/2011

Don't wash that cup in the toilet.

Don't drag your brother across the road.

No daddy isn't hurting mommy. He is just tickling me because I am cold.

Emma - posted on 08/14/2011

"I understand kitty scratched you, but she did not want a bath in the toilet"

" Love bring me a cloth Flynn got hold of the chocolate spread again, Nix that its not chocolate ! "

" can mommy please poo on her own "

Emma - posted on 08/14/2011

" I do "
" im pregnant"
" im Pregnant again"