Kirsten - posted on 01/13/2012 ( no moms have responded yet )
Sorry this post will be long, but need to explain everything, so you all understand.
3 years ago i took my ex to court for a defined contact order, because he when he was seeing his child he waqs just asking to get back with me and also he would come for a few weeks then miss visits then come and miss visits etc, so at court it was decided i would be taken out of the situation and he would have contact at my mothers, again same thing happened he would come then miss visits then come and miss visits, then he decided to move away for 6 months so they didnt see him and he didt tell anybody he was moving away i fund out through a friend of his, after 6 months he came back and we went back to court, this time it was decided for him to have contact at a contact center twice a week whilst a CAFCASS report was being done, again same thing happened he would come and miss visits then come and then miss visits, he didnt turn up to one cotact center at all, also he never turned up to any of his CAFCASS meetings and then when we was back at court, he didnt turn up to the hearing, so the courts agreed if he was to see his child again he would need to apply to the courts and explain himself. Now 2 years later of him not seeing his child he has sent me a solicitors lettere stating he wants to see her again, as you are all probably aware i am not happy about this as i dont want him to do what he done 3 years ago, because it is not stable and not in the best interest for my child. My child is only 5 and has probably seen her father about 7-8 times since she was born so he is just a starnger to her, also she starts school in sptember which is a big enough transaction as it is without having somebody come in who she doesnt know. I feel like his commitment has been erratic at the best regarding to his commitment to visitation and appointments regarding the child and i would describe that as unsettling, unstable and pointless for the child. He has also stalked me which led to me moving home and leaving my old job having to get a new job in a different place, he was violent towards me and played mind games with me, he would say things like, when i was breastfeeding "it is not normal" when my little girl was first born he would say "im not a good mum and get her taken off me" etc etc made me really depressed and i ended up with post natal depression because of him. Also i am pregnant and due to have the baby next month, so me and my solicitor both agree he is only doing this as he has found out i am pregnant. He has got mental health issues self harms and has threatned to kidnapp my child. I am just curiouse as anybody else been through something similar and also what will happen at court will he get another chance at seeing his child or will the courts realise he is just playing games and i have given him enough chances to see his child but he wasnt interested.
Any advice would really help