Orgasm Issues

Jamie - posted on 03/04/2013

My experience is that the more orgasms I have, the more I CAN have. You most likely are not broken! You just need some practice.

Forget the idea of a man with a "magic hand" who knows exactly how to touch you. I suspect he is a myth! All women are different and men aren't born knowing how to touch a woman. Heck...there's still guys out there who've never met the man in the boat!

You know what feels good. You probably know what turns you on. TELL HIM! Use short words. If you don't know, then tell him that you want to explore. Warning: you have to have a reliable partner for exploration. Men are quite sensitive and some of them run away in a fright if they think their woman is too sexually aggressive.

(Discuss this with him first please...don't just spring it on him.) To have more orgasms, I recommend you start out masturbating yourself to orgasm with him in the room, talk together about sex while you do and get really turned on. If you're all warmed up before he even touches you, it'll turn him on watching you and you're more likely to have some more orgasms when you let him touch you.

Reaching orgasm is about letting go and enjoying the sensations to the point that they overwhelm you. Your clit isn't the only way to get there, I've had some crazy ones! (Ooooh more left elbow!)

One thing that my lover and I do is I read erotic stories to him out loud while he touches me or I play with myself. If there's something I really like in the story, I tell him. If there's something really stupid in the story, I tell him, and we giggle. Discuss whether those ideas are good for just fantasy or if you'd like to make them happen in real life.

Veena - posted on 12/12/2011

I know very little of this but I know that these issues are common with me. I only had them in intercourse with one man. I believe this to be because to me that man was like

Superman lover who was very thick and rock hard and powerful. It was like I could do a chin up on him. When he was on his back I could ride him to orgasm by controling how my clitty rubbed on him. In reverse positions like reverse cowgirl or doggy this man could control a tempo and mix up the power in his thrusts so his balls would swing to either gently caress or roughly slap my clit. Either way it was the combination of vaginal stretching and clitoral stimulation. My Hubby does this through long oral on my clit and use of his fingers to stretch me down there. His penis cannot come close to giving orgasm.

Constance - posted on 10/06/2011

Don't think about it and relax completely. If you are tense at all it won't happen. My husband gives me multiples but if I am anticipating it, t won't happen at all. They just come.

Kitty - posted on 10/03/2011

i can only make my self do it in the shower! but i can really on do it when we have sex hard and my orgasums change all the time some are fast and some take a few seconds to end there the best lol

Lisa - posted on 05/31/2011

I wouldn't say u were broken u just need to be stimulated the right way. When u have sex have ur man stimulate ur clit while he is also inside of you... having ur nipple sucked on at the same time can do wonders!

Also.. do u fake it? I NEVER do because then the man will think that he is doing what u like and he won't try any harder.

Jennifer - posted on 02/10/2011

a great site to research How-to's & "personal exploration is AskDanAndJennifer.com

Sarah - posted on 02/08/2011

All of these answers are right. You have to explore yourself first....or with someone who is willing to take extra time. There are all sorts of ways to get an orgasm....you just have to be willing to try new things and find someone who you can trust and that has patience. Good luck to you sweetie.

P.S.- You also shouldn't rely on what you see in movies or magazines...they really glam it up and make it seem perfect. Only you can know what is right for you....not a movie. :)

Kitty - posted on 09/10/2010

hmm well i think you need to maybe think about it tell them to touch you light and softly ?

Emma - posted on 04/20/2010

No you are not broken,
Ive found that the best sex comes from a partner you really trust, and are totally comfortable with if your not relaxed you wont have one. Plus you need to be able to give direction, How is your partner going to know where your g-spot is if you don't know.
Ive only ever managed to have an orgasm with my hubby while having penetrative sex never before i met him but i think that has a lot to do with how well he knows my body.

Heidi - posted on 12/09/2009

No I don't you are broken at all. Its quite common. I for have had only 2 partners in my life that were able to give me orgasms...my husband and my high school sweet heart. The rest were all duds. I think with practice and knowing your own body really helps. My husband knows the exact spot every time. Explore your body and figure out what helps you.

Angela - posted on 12/06/2009

Most girls don't have orgasms through sex. In fact, about 80% of women need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm at all. Also everyone needs different stimulation, so the best thing for you to do is explore yourself and tell or show your partner because anyone that's worth having a relationship won't be offended, just happy that they can please you.

Also you might not be getting enough stimulation. While some girls just require feather light touches some have what I joke at my parties as a clitoris of steel and they practically need a jackhammer to get the job done and that is where bedroom toys like bullets come in handy. I am a sexual health specialist with Pure Romance by Angela and while I do sell toys and creams my primary job is to help women have better sex lives, whether it's by themselves or with a partner. Feel free to email me angela@prtoys4u.com to answer any questions or visi my website www.prtoys4u.com to check out our products.

Jillian - posted on 10/27/2009

no not at all. when my husband and i got together we were both virgins and after maybe 5 months of having sex he learned to tell when i was faking it and when i actually had an orgasm, even though most of the time i didnt really know i was faking i was only 16 i had no idea what i was really doing! anyway he called me out on it and we got into a huge fight over it and he told me to never fake again to only show exactly what i was feeling because that was how he learned exactly what i liked the most. eventually we figured out that i could have multiple orgasms every time if i stimulated my clit the way i liked it while he did his work penetrating lol, this way we both were fully satisfied and no one felt left out. remember no one knows how you like it more than you do explore your body find exactly what you like and communicate with your partner, most of the time they will want you to be satisfied and will not feel like you are doing the job for them if you explain it this way to them. or if they still feel a little akward about it, show him exactly how you like it, men are HUGELY voyeuristic and will love seeing this little show put on just for them!! i hope this helps it took me a long time to figure out on my own!!