Daughter's birthday = nightmare!!! WWYOUDO?? :)

Amy - posted on 03/20/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )

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So my daughter Maddy turned 3 today, but we celebrated her birthday yesterday. We had all the grandparents over (my parents are divorced, my husband's parents are still together) plus great-grandpa, cousins, aunts, uncles, friends... total of about 12 adults and 7 kids. Last year and the year prior we did the same, having everyone over at our house and it was only kind of awkward blending the families and Maddy did pretty good with only a couple upset moments, but this year was a whole different story! Now that Miss Maddy is 3, as you all know I am sure, she has issues with sharing, mixed in with over-stimulation and sugar = disaster! The first hour was fun for her, getting to visit with family and friends and having snacks.. then we started pin the tail on the donkey and older cousins kinda took over upsetting the birthday girl.. We then pulled out presents to open and again with the other kids trying to take over! Maddy cried pretty much the whole time poor thing :( The other kids were playing with her new toys and we were trying to hurry her along a bit, taking a few breaks to let her play, to just get opening over-with so she could play. This upset some adults, too.. thinking we weren't letting "kids be kids". But really the other kids just needed to just let Maddy do her thing! I always keep her away from the "present pile" so her friends can have space to open their gifts when we go to birthday parties for other kids, but not everyone other parent does that. We did Hello Kitty rice krispie treats cake and icecream sundaes after presents and the kids were calm for that of course!! The party ended with a few people pissed off, me confused as to why they were still pissed and exactly why, my daughter recovering from her bawling over everything and not wanting to eat dinner and me wondering how the heck we are going to change things next year!!! I really don't want to leave anyone (family) out, but I don't know how to make it easier for next year and the years after?? Baby brother turns 1 next January! HELP!! AHHH! :)

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YeeSin - posted on 03/31/2011

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I did my DD's birthday party outside of the house. i find it more manageable, and there are party planners to help coordinates guests. Plus, with outside venue, you only have the party room for about an hour, then activities for the kids. It makes it easier to ask guests to leave, and not to open presents till you are home. More organized and less chaotic! With her getting older, she might just want to have her friends at her party, and just do dinners with your grandparents separately.

Bel - posted on 03/22/2011

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our DD is 3yrs old too, she just turned 3 this month. we have a newborn aswell (3.5mths now) so we didnt do much for her birthday this year. we were away the weekend before her birthday so that was kinda a present in itself for her lol we just pretty much did our own thing at home to celebrate and both sides of the family popped in to give her pressies etc! i think do what is good for you! maybe next time make it much smaller at home, & let the relatives just drop by at different times if they want?

Lacy - posted on 03/21/2011

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My husbands family lives about 11 hours away so this year is the 1st year that his family is gonna make it down. But I wouldnt. Whenever you have it in a place other than your home it really is much more relaxed and not so akward I would say. And rembemer finds a place that you need to book a time slot. That way it only lasts a couple hours and not all day. I think that really is a big key in it. On the invites I wrote from 1-3pm If you think you can handle the families together for two hours it will pay off then having two different parties.

Lacy - posted on 03/21/2011

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When my son turned 1 we had a big party at home with friends and lots of family, it didnt go that great, He had alot of melt downs and kids taking over his new toys. So for his second birthday we had it at a big indoor kids place. There was a pizza buffet so I didnt have to cook. They space was very large so it didnt feel cramp, and there was tons of games and go carts, bolwing, and golf. All inside. so it kidda spread everyone up but there was something for all ages. So it was so much calmer. My sons birthday is on St. Pattys day so I always do something special with him on that day and have a cup cakes but his party is usually on a weekend. So this year we are having his party this coming up Sunday, it will be a inflatable play place with moon walks and slides and lazer tag for the older kids. I had decided I was going to go small on the number of kids so I invited only 6. But as of today I have had a few phone calls on so and so is coming with us is that okay. so now that is going to be 14 kids and about 20 adults. This party is only two hours long so I will only be doing cake and ice cream. HOPE the cake ends up being big enough. My advice whould be to don it somewhere other than your home. and that why it dont last all day and the kids dont feel like they have the run of the place. I know it sounds more pricey but in my case I save alot of money on doing it somewhere else than my home. I hope this helps. :)

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Momof1 - posted on 06/19/2012

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That's rough. :/ For my son's first Bday, we invited family and 2 close friends. Let's see, that was 10 adults and 4 kids. The one older girl "helped" open presents, but I didn't really mind, beings my son had zero idea what to do with them. LOL We didn't do any games, just had a little food. For his second birthday, my husband and I decided to just have friends with kids, because we moved to a smaller place and it was either all family or friends with kids. I don't really have any family, besides my sister, so she came with her kids and I invited my dad, even though we said no family. I didn't think my dad would make the drive (we live far apart and rarely see each other), but he came. I am very happy he came, though. That did cause some drama with the whole not having family come. :/ However the same girl (from birthday one) and her brother were all up in my son's present. It did upset me a little this year, just because he wanted to do it, just at his own pace and yes he did get cranky, as well. I just let the other kids go at it, as long as they gave my son the gift to hold for a picture. This year will be tough. We still live in a smaller place and his birthday is in November. Do we invite family and not friends with kids or do the same as last year? I started thinking about that almost as soon as is last birthday was over. I hope things work out for her next birthday. Sorry for not having advice.

Dhanya - posted on 06/18/2012

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take it from a mom of a 4yr old boy, don't open presents at the party. keep them engaged otherwise, games, face painting, toys that they can all play with. the minute that they open presents the party gets out of hand. I've had success the last 2 yrs with the technique. presents aren't opened until after the party.!

Nora - posted on 03/30/2011

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We don't have family around but after my daughters first birthday in November, we skipped a party for my son's birthday and went and had a family day at a musuem and then had dinner and lots of ice cream. I don't think he cared about not hanving a party since we made it his special day with just the four of us. We only invited 5 other families. Half the people that RSVP's for my daughters party called right when the party was to start to say they weren't coming (one excuse was our neighbor across the street had to fix his car radio right then even though we had it Sunday afternoon and he had a 3 day weekend.) After that we decided not to mess with it and made it our own. But like I said, there is no family around us.

Amy - posted on 03/21/2011

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Do you still invite both sides of families? That is also part of our problem I think.. aside from the kids going insane! I am wondering if I should do separate things with my family & my husband's family or if that would be more hassle.. Oy! :)

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