My 11 month old WON'T SLEEP

Elena - posted on 02/18/2010

Metallica...that is so funny. How can he sleep with that going on? :)

Anyway, my daughter sounds exactly like your son. She has never been a sleeper. The first few months of her life she'd make it 20 mins before waking up. I would put her down in the middle of the night and pray that I could get just 30 mins of sleep before she woke up. Now, at almost a year, she's still up. She takes 2 naps during the day, about 20-40mins each. At night she gets up 2 to 7 times a night.

Like you, I've read all of the books. The only thing I can do is make sure she's not hungry, not wet/dirty and not in pain. After that, I lie her in her crib after reading several stories to her and turning on her ocean waves cd. If she sleeps, great! If not, at least I tried and I didn't let her get her way. Going to get her when she's having a fit in her crib just teaches her to do it again. I have faith that someday she will get it and will finally sleep. Until then, *YAWN*.

Beck - posted on 02/17/2010

I agree I dont believe tht controlled crying is the only way!!!! I used to have the same problem with my little man now 11mths. My bub (like yours by the sound) is a low sleep requirement baby, meaning they only need 8-14hrs sleep in 24hrs. We do the following and it works a treat!! plus its getting better and better!!
Corey wakes usually around 7am (lately 7.45am yahhooo) he has a bfeed then breakfast
9.30 milk (bfeed for now) and fruit for morning tea
11.20 lunch - meat, vegies, carb (rice / pasta / potato) then desert (yoghurt)
12noon bed time (usually sleeps 2-2.5hrs!!)
2.30 milk (bfeed) and arvo tea (cheese on toast / avacardo and ham on crackers, pikelts etc)
5.20 tea (vegies and carb)
6pm Nudie time (clothes off play)
6.15 bath time
6.30 out of bath
6.35 milk
6.45 story time
6.55 into cot

We also do the nappy change, story then bedtime routine at 11.45 before lunch time sleep. In the cot room we do...
Cuddle on couch whilse reading - household calm, whilst reading we say before, during and after "nearlt time for nigh, nigh" "nealry time to find teddy" etc
Good night to anyone at home - kiss
then into bed room
We lay bub in our arms and rock him whilst we sing twinkle, twinkle, then lay him in his cot with his teddy (loves his bedtime ted)
We tuck him in tight - shoving a towel rolled up down either side to keep him in firm. Corey starts on his side. We dont have to tuck him as tight now that he sleeps so well.
We then rub his back and legs and say
"sshh, sshh, sshh, sshh time to sleep"
" sshh, sshh, sshh, sshh mummy and daddy love you"
"sshh, sshh, sshh, sshh nigh, nigh"

we repeat this twice, then stop rubbing and walk out. Corey now never needs re settleing but at first if he did put up a fight we would go in - shut the door behind us so there is no confusion that he is getting up then repeat the sshh, shh..... and out. It only ever took going in twice maybe three times.

When he wakes and has had a decent sleep (if he ever wakes under and hour we do the sshh, sshh to get him back off for at least 1hr 20mins) we walk in and say "good sleeping bubba" happy and bright and get him up. This way he knows the difference between when you are expecting him to go back off and when he can hop up.

If he wakes during the night we go in (maybe give him a sip of water), re plug the dummy, re tuck him in and do the sshh, sshh - we are in and out in under 1 min and he always (except when teething and needs a shot of panadol) settles in one go.

He seems to know now when he needs more sleep and that he needs to go back off. He can now resettle himself too which he could never do, occasionally he will yell out once then go back off.

Our little man is also gogogogo and is happy with no sleep, that was always the problem, he would be happy so I would not fight him to go back off so it formed BAD habits. Now he is an even happier bub.

We must make sure he doesn't sleep when we are out in the pram or car before 12noon otherwise it can muck it up (occasionally its fine we have learnt to addapt) but we try to hold him out til 12 so he has one good sleep.

We read 'Dream Baby guide' from Shayne Rowling which is where our above addapted routine is from. We started when Corey was 6mths and it changed our life.

Good luck, its so hard.

P.S we were expecting to HAVE to use controlled crying with Corey at 6mths but never had to using this above routine (and many more hints from the book) - like having a heater in his room set at 21degrees in winter, using a sleeping bag etc and lots of other day time communication things. This is just a wrap up for you... would love to think it works for you like it does us.... fingers crossed for you!!!

Email me for more info if you would like

Katherine - posted on 02/17/2010

Sounds like my daughter. Please do not do CIO!!! Four hours is way too long, it exhausts you, it exhausts baby. I'm thinking he is way over-stimulated. You need a wind down period.



What books have you read? As far as parenting books.



The best thing I've ever done is that when you put them to sleep NO CONVERSATION, if he gets up, lay him back down and do it over and over and over until it's a behavior and he doesn't get up again. Get a routine going. Bath time, a book, then bed. When it's bedtime don't tell him no or react to his jumping---just keep putting him down.



My daughter does the same thing, and I can't for the life of me figure out where she gets all of this energy.



Research controlled crying, it can have detrimental effects. I know how you feel, I've been there, and I've been at my wits end. Dr. Sears is a good author to read too.



You are so lucky he used to sleep 12 hours!! Mine STILL gets up about 3-4 times a night. Ugh Hang in there!

Lady - posted on 02/17/2010

As difficult as it is I think control crying is the best thing to try right now. Give him a cuddle, put him in his crib then leave him for five minutes. Go back then if he is still crying give him another cuddle then leave again. Try to increase the time you leave him for by a couple of minutes each time. It may take a week or so of doing this and may take up to an hour each time but eventually he should get the message to go to sleep. Children get used to going without sleep but it is not good for their health and they need sleep to grow and be healthy so you need to teach them and for your own sanity too. I hope this works for you I know a lot of people it did the job with esspecially around this age. Good luck.