Night Time Woes

Jennifer - posted on 01/13/2011 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I'm having a horrible time getting my Carl (DOB 3/25/10) to stay asleep lately. He goes to bed between 8 and 9 p.m., then he's up from 12 a.m. to 3 a.m. either screaming or sleeping on me in the living room. He won't go back to sleep on his own and he's not hungry, he just wants me. When I go get him he doses off and on on me in the chair and then after a few hours he will finally sleep deep enough that I can put him back in his bed. I won't bring him into our bed during the night because I don't want to get into that habit, so I just watch t.v. with my eyes propped open. I'm exhausted. I feel like he's 2 weeks old all over again. The weird thing is, before Christmas, he was on a GREAT schedule! He went to bed - stayed there - and didn't get up until 7 or 8 in the morning! He took a short nap at 10 a.m. and a longer nap around 2-3 p.m.. It was great! Tuesday night my husband and I decided to try and let him cry it out. He cried for 1 hour and 12 minutes, then I caved and cuddled him and we both cried. Last night - with my husband practically tying me to the chair - I let him cry it out. He cried for over 2 hours!!! I don't think I can do it again tonight. It was awful!! I feel so horrible when all he wants is to cuddle. My husband says, I can't go cuddle him at night when he's 18 and in college so he needs to learn to put himself to sleep.... I'm sure there's some truth to that, but right now, I'm thinking we can just both go to Harvard!! ♥ Are any of you having similar issues? What are your opinions? Thanks in advance.
~Jennifer

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Jennifer - posted on 01/15/2011

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You're so right, Efua!! I LOVE being Carl's Mommy! It's just hard when you think they're on a schedule then they change gears on you. I kept him up late tonight seeing if that might help. Last night I did the "cry it out" method and he lasted about 45 minutes. That's better than 2 hours I suppose. I did housework to keep my mind off of it and turned the sound down on the monitor. (We have one of those video ones, so I could still see him.) He just got his first tooth today, so hopefully that's what was causing all the chaos. Thanks for the replies everyone.

Winnie Takyiwah - posted on 01/15/2011

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My daughter use to be a great sleeper too. But recently will wake up immediately she touches the bed. I tried crying it out once when she was about 5 months old and broke my own heart. I promised never to do it again. But when she refuses to go to bed lately, I just leave her in her crib to cry it out. I go to the kitchen and get her stuff ready for the next day. I tune out by focusing on the task at hand and other things. After a few days, she doesn't cry that much. She goes to sleep in about 15 minutes now if not sooner. I its a little easier now because she is on a schedule. But good luck and hang in there. Motherhood is not easy and no one prepares you for it. But it is absolutely rewarding.

Jennifer - posted on 01/13/2011

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Based on the fact that I have my Master's degree in Special Education with a specialization in Behavior Management, you would think I would be GOOD at this type of thing! HA! It's SO different when it's YOURS!! I know all about "shaping behavior" and how I'm only "reinforcing" him when I go get him and the whole deal about he'll just cry longer when I go get him... but it's SO HARD!! I actually almost vomitted last night because I got so upset. My husband is working Nights tonight so it will be even harder than last night because I won't have him to keep me downstairs...



Becky, your experience has motivated me to at least give it another shot tonight. I just have to deal with the battle between the emotional and the logical sides of me... ugh... Thanks for your input and wish me luck!

Ashley - posted on 01/13/2011

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My son has been acting kind of the same way...except he is easy to get to sleep and as soon as you lay him down he AWAKE! We also tried the crying thing and he cried for over an hour when I caved. Last night I let him cry for 10 minutes then went in and sat in the rocking chair beside his crib - he got up stood in his crib and bounced up and down like he was having a party. -GREAT-
Maybe the crying thing does work eventually -I dont know what else to do either!
He also still wakes up once or twice a night to eat - I feel like I dont sleep either.

Becky - posted on 01/13/2011

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i would say just keep on letting the cry it out . It was soooo hard fo rme .. my son did this too about 2 months ago.was up all night long just wanting to be held.

my doctor told me to just give it THREE days... let him cry it out.. .and eventually it worked!
one thing is..your caving in and cuddlign him will make him discover that if he cries for that legnth of time, he will get picked up... so he will cry longer the next time.. i discovered this on my own.
if you let your baby cry for 45 mins and then pick him up, he'll thinkn that he has to cry that long plus some to get picked up... just hang in there..
my son cried for 2 and a half hours when we first started crying it out method..and then fell asleep.. the next night was only about an hour, then night after maybe half an hour. Now, we've been doing it for 2 months and i do his bedtime routine and he goes to sleep in seconds in his bed on his own without crying at all. if he wakes in the night, we just leave him, usually he'll fuss a bit and then pass out within 5-10 mins.. if it goes on for 20 mins i go in there because usually he has a dirty diaper or not feeling good

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