What to do? My nephew wont stop hurting my baby boy...

Jackie - posted on 03/27/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Since my son was born, my nephew has shown signs of jealousy. At about the time my son was 9 mos old my sister was babysitting for me, and there was incident at her house where my son was in the walker and her son my nephew came up behind him and bit him in the neck so hard that his head (my nephews) was shaking. And my son was in so much pain that he didn't immediately cry so my sister had no clue it has even happened until she turned around and there was her son with his mouth on my son biting away. That is the first serious incident i can recall. There have been other smaller incidents pushing hitting etc. When I babysat for my nephew incidents like this were rare because he was just better behaved for me. I haven't babysit him recently because his dad is home with him. Recently, my nephew felt inclined to shove my son down a half of a flight of stairs, thankfully my son didnt get hurt too badly. My sister spanked his bottom and made him apologize to my son and promised to never do it again. She and her bf then started making excuses like he doesnt understand consequences or what he is really doing. My nephew is almost 4 years old now and I am pretty sure he does. My son is 2 now and he knows when he hurts someone and when he has done something he should not do. About 4 days later, my nephew and my son were playing together jumping on a mattress my nephew then decided to get on top of my son while he was pinned down on the mattress and push his face into the pillow and not let him up almost suffocating him. My back was turned so I didn't see it immediately but my son was scared he could not breathe. I took my nephew into the bathroom spanked his butt and made him go to bed. I am not a big spanker i usually use time out but when its something that serious i think spanking is ok. So, I am curious what do i do now? Do i keep my son away from him? This is my sisters child we are very close, i love her very much but she just throws her hands up like what else can i do that I am not doing? He is just a boy being rough this is normal behavior! Is it? MY son isn't doing it. And my nephew only acts like this with MY son supposedly. But i think its maybe because the other kids he is around are almost as big as he is. What would you do in this case? I have tried talking to my sister but she just thinks i am over reacting.

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Jackie - posted on 03/29/2012

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Thanks Ashley, the thing is he knows that there are ground rules and consequences when he is with me at my house, we were at a water park and it was really late for the boys to be up anyway so I dont know if that had a role in it or not, but his parents I dont enforce discipline at home as much, I have seen them give him chance after chance and they put up with way too much, example he is almost 4 and he still bites when he is angry with them. the thing that kinda scares me is that even when my FIL got up and told him to get off of my son he didnt move, not until my FIL picked him up.

Ashley - posted on 03/29/2012

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I wish i could offer so great advice as i have a 2 year old and a 4 year old as well as a 4 year old brother... My kids have learnt the different ground rules for each of the different houses...maybe you could try setting ground rules with your nephew and consequences that are followed through with...maybe one of he consequences could be that he doesnt get to come and play...anyway i hope you get some sort of help from someone else good luck

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