Cathralynn - posted on 04/09/2010 ( 20 moms have responded )
Okay, this is for those moms who use time outs, or whatever you call them, for your form of discipline (I don't like the term punishment) and don't spank. I have been doing some form of time outs since my daughter was one. The first version was called counting and I held my daughter sitting and slowly counted to three mostly to distract her from what she was doing when she wouldn't listen. It really upset her and was effective for awhile. Then we moved on to formal time outs months later where I put her in her room, a safe place and shut the door. She would scream bloody murder, I would wait like thirty seconds and then go explain things, hug, etc. Again effective. I have slowly started timing them a min per age as someone recomended. So now at 22mo I do two min. It's still very effective but I have a question. Sometimes at the end of two min recently she has been playing with toys happy as can be. Now if I get my brain around this the point is not to make her upset but to get her to listen and stop doing what you would like her to stop doing as well as not give her any more attention until she behaves. That is still happening. I do very few time outs and all I have to do is count to two sometimes and she will stop a bad behaviour or simply ask her if she wants a time out and she says no and behaves. So goal achieved so far, but I feel weird that she comes out from time outs cheery and with no need for hugs, I stll explain :) My plan is to get a timer and stick with it. But do other moms have a time out place where playing is not allowed or a chair etc? When I try to get my girl to sit in one spot in a chair or a step for time outs, it ends up being a game for her and she gets a lot of mom's attention as well as a mom whose ready to slap which I won't do! I also don't like the idea of putting her in her crib or a bathroom etc. I think it will attach negative feelings to those places. What do you do?