1 year old sleeping arrangments.

Leanne - posted on 05/30/2010 ( 62 moms have responded )

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My son is 1 year old. And he still needs to be swaddled and rocked to go to sleep. How do i get him off of that? I just want to lay him down and walk away.

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Amelia - posted on 06/03/2010

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Do not let him cry alone in his crib!!!! Most young children are just not developementally ready to fall asleep without some help. Babies need to be taught how to sleep, not forced and abandoned!
I lay my daughter downand keep my hand on her so that she knows i am there, sometimes she needs me to pat her back and hum quietly to get her to relax. It used to take 20 minutes for her to get into a deep enough sleep that i could leave without her waking, but now it only takes 5 or 10.

Maybe try rocking him until he is sleepy but still awake a bit, then laying him down but keeping your hand on him so he is still comforted.

Reading this may help as well:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/t070300...

April - posted on 06/04/2010

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Let them cry!!!! Its hard turn the baby monitor on in their room, turn urs off and check every 5 minutes for 15 minutes. u will be amazed its not long at all that they learn to go to sleep, I also pushed sleeping time back and ROUTINE ROUTINE!! I have the 3 b's Bath, Book and Bed!!! Works for me

Hayley - posted on 06/04/2010

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Leanne, I have 2 Boys - age 3 and age 1. My eldest wanted me to fall asleep with him every night - I never rocked him - but I lay with him untill he fell asleep. I swore that I would not do that with my second. Well my second son has just turned 1 and he now wants to sleep with me in my bed. I fought it for awhile - but I then made a mature decission. IT IS NOT FOREVER!!! My eldest is 3 sleeps in his own bed and i find myself missing him at night. So I am going to enjoy the time I have with my boys. I PROMISE IT'S NOT FOREVER. I find that if I do what makes them happy and feel secure - the putting to bed session goes alot faster and less painful for everyone, at a year they suffer from seperation anxiety and your boy like mine obviously needs you more than other babies. And that's where we as mommies just have to work alot harder at making them feel secure and happy and at ease with going to sleep. Good Luck Leanne. I promise it will all pass. I think our biggest worry is in a couple of years when we can't get our boys out of bed for school - he he he

Jay - posted on 06/03/2010

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i know its hard to leave them crying but if you stick with it he'll be going to sleep himself. My own opinion is that if your staying in the room with them when are they gonna grow out of needing you when they go to sleep. I don't think it is abondoning your child because if your going back and forth they know your still there. My wee boy at about 6 months starting getting upset when i put him down and oh me did he scream some nights it would take an hour others it would take 2 but as i've said its worth it in the end. I get time to myself in the evening and a good nights sleep. If you do try it stick to it though don't do a couple of nights and give up that'll just confuse him.

Wendy - posted on 06/03/2010

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Hi Leanne
I used to swaddle my son, stopped doing that one week and still rocked him to sleep and then when he was about 11 months old I said to myself I can't keep doing this. So like some of the others suggested I tried the controlled crying, now he has his bath with Daddy, comes downstairs, Daddy reads stories and then I get the milk and say it's bedtime up we go I do still hold him tight and give him his milk, wind him and a few cuddles mummy loves you, if you need mummy then just call now he even points to his cot so I put him down, and say goodnight, he usually sits up and smiles but he didn't to begin with. I understand it's hard to let them cry it's horrible to hear them cry but eventually he will stop crying and calm down, I used to go into him and say it's bedtime and give him a cuddle and put him back. But you really need to make up your mind to do it then give it a proper go, I bet he'll be settling himself after a week of torture x

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Amy - posted on 07/09/2010

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I agree with other moms I waited til my daughter was 13 months old to break her of the swaddle habit, such a bad idea. I had to do the whole routine, bath , bottle brush her 4 teeth then lay her down in the crib say night night sleepy time. She cried, then slowed to a whine, then quiet the first night took a lot of will power. then every night same time after a week she would barely whimper, I broke the pattern for 4th of July fireworks and have spent all week trying to get her back on schedule. Be brave and listen to your child's cry there's a difference between I don't want to go to bed and I messed my diaper and cant fall asleep now or still hungry/thirsty.

Marianne - posted on 06/21/2010

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Paris, I like how you think! i try to do the same...to put myself "in his shoes" i like to have a glass of cranberry juice before going to bed and read, so i read a book to my 1 year old, after bath and pj's, then put him in the crib with a bottle and a soft toy to play with. After he falls asleep, with minimal fuss, i remove the toy and bottle.

Sara - posted on 06/21/2010

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for us we had to introduce some tough love, lay him down and walk away, let him cry for a few minutes at first, then pick up and calm him down, extend the periods of crying but still letting him know you are there for him if he needs you. If he doesnt calm down, i would give him some milk warmed up in a bottle and walk away with the monitor on to make sure he is ok. I know your not suppose to give him a bottle at bed timen in the crib, but for the first week or so to get him used to comforting himself to sleep i did. After a few days he starting going to bed with the pacifier by himself, but he goes to bed between 7 and 8, and wakes for a bottle between 4 and 6. still working on having him sleep later. as for the swaddling, we just stopped it was to hard to loosen the blankets, the bottle comforted him enough. So after the first week, he now goes to bed by himself with minimal fussiness.

Noelle - posted on 06/17/2010

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its very hard my 1st son was an amazing baby but got a culture shock with my 2nd. She was totally the opposite a bit like what your dealing with. We kept her in same routing since she was very small, she wanted to be rocked etc. I soon stopped that as it extremely bad habit and its not the child fault they know no different just give him his bath at night then his bottle and put him straight down after he prob will cry but let him he will soon learn that he is able to make himself go asleep. It will be difficult but give it a go ive no pros ever sinve although for her naps during the day she always winges without fail and after 10 mins or so she asleep. Good Luck:)

Andrea - posted on 06/16/2010

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We started the cry yourself to sleep thing last thursday. She cried the first two nights for about 10mins. Now she lays down and goes to sleep. Nap time is the same. If you do the same thing for naps and bed it is easier. Just remember, it is your own opinion on how you do it. Some may not agree with the cry it out method, but for some it is the only way. My duahgter was born may 4th and I am now 10 weeks pregnant again. We decided to start bedtime on her own when I started having problems rocking her and getting cramps.
do as you feel is better. Just keep in mind, that eventually they need to go to bed on their own. And they will probably cry the first few times anyway. That is what my doctor told me.

Heather - posted on 06/16/2010

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Let's keep in mind that these babies are 1 year old... How often are we as adults, just going in and lay down and fall asleep??? Most of us, read a book, listen to music, etc. to fall asleep or somthing on this order... To expect a 1 year old to just fall asleep with NO or little help from mom or dad is just sad, because you would not do this to yourself, I have the same problem with the CIO method I myself do not want to cry myself to sleep, why should I make my daughter, just because I think that I need to sleep more than she does? I put myself in my daughters shoes to see what the problem is and how best to fix it for ourselves.

Ashley - posted on 06/15/2010

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My daughter is 13 months. I had to give her a bottle of breastmilk and let her cry it out in her crib. It was really hard at first, and i would have to watch the clock and after 2 minutes i'd go in and love her and put herbck own and walk away. I kept increasing the time and even now months later she still cries herself to sleep in her crib at naptime, it's only 10 minutes of crying max, but still. And night time we're starting to do the same thing. The problem is when she is sick or gets allergies i lay with her and that messes everything up and means we have to start all over. So my advice is if you're going to let them cry it out, don't change it because they're sick or something. I know it's hard, my LillyBean gets a little allergy reaction and has an ear infection and asthma attacks and then she's throwing up mucas and i just want to coddle her.. but in the run she needs her routine kept the same. Hope i helped.

Danielle - posted on 06/13/2010

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hi leanne i just recently had same problem and i am taking him to a sleep specialist coz he still wanted bottles and wasnt eating properly either. it was very helpful coz he is now sleeping through the night bottles eating lots more and to put him down i was told to put him to bed awake at sleep time and let him learn to put himself tosleep by placing him in and checking him at 5 mins then put him back down and check him at 10 mins, but please refer to your midwife they can explain it better, it does work.

Sandy - posted on 06/12/2010

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I'm sorry I believe routine is key ... but letting your child cry ... sorry I don't agree with it at all!!!! They are so small for such a short time and will not need us before we know it. With my first son I also rocked him and gradually he got out of it on his own my second turned 1 two weeks ago and is still breastfed, I feed him and just rock him a little bit and sing to him then I put him in the crib. I say go with your gut feeling, you're his mother and you will know. As they say "Parenting is learning" Good Luck!!

Gail - posted on 06/12/2010

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I didn't read all the replies, because reading about all these people who leave their babies to cry was making me sad :(

I've heard of the no cry sleep solution, but I haven't tried it so I can't recommend it. Personally I co-sleep with my son, and will do until he's ready to go into his own room. To get him to sleep, he still gets snuggles and a breastfeed and then I go lay him down in bed. The time will come when he doesn't need the cuddles/breastfeed (or in your case swaddling and rocking) to go to sleep, but I'm going to let him come to that stage by himself rather than letting him scream for me while I ignore him :(

I agree with what someone else said though, try making the swaddle a little looser each night til he doesn't need it any more.

Amy - posted on 06/11/2010

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Ferberize Ferberize Ferberize! Read the book "Solving your Child's Sleep Problems " by DR. Richard Ferber. If you stick to his plan you will be happy, I did with my son at 9months old when i just couldn't take the lack of sleep anymore and within 3 days he was going to bed on his own and sleeping through the night. TRUST it works.

Sarah - posted on 06/11/2010

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Unless you can stand to let him cry you will prob have to keep rocking him. My 1st I had to lay by her or she would not go to sleep but my baby girl now wants to be put down she can't get comfortable if I'm holding her. It's nice and so much easier, if you can stand letting them cry for a few days its worth it, but that is easier said than done ;)

Erin - posted on 06/10/2010

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What do you mamma's do if YOU don't have a routine schedule? My work as an anesthesiologist is totally variable on the time I get home...on a regular day anywhere from 4-7, when I'm late it's 7-9pm, and on call it may be 1 am or not til 7am the NEXT day...how do you routine the kids to this? My hubby stays home but as well as he does, not the same as mommy...
We have 3 and 1 yr old boys-the 3 yr old we tried ALL the tricks, cry it out..but is an hour too much? I say YES! So he sleeps with us...the one yr old he is a "Blue hair", eats, sleeps, wakes on routine but by his own making with encouragement from us...yes he rocks to sleep but it takes 10 minutes max..how is that too much? It will be gone in a blink of an eye and I often cry wishing I could hold him longer...then he sleeps all night long..
The point is you just have to deal with what you have and be patient as you can and give em love!

Amanda - posted on 06/10/2010

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I agree, a routine is key! Our daughter has been sleeping through the night since 5 weeks old - with no waking up. Now, she has dinner at 6, a bath following, then a little playtime and a bottle. She sleeps 7:30-7:30 with two naps. At 6 months, she fell off the wagon for a couple of days, so we tried the controlled crying. By the sounds of it, we were lucky, she only cried for about 10-15 munutes and was back in her routine within 2 days. Now when it's bedtime, she says, "night night" and is totally ready. I agree with Rebekah, now when they cry at night, you know something is actually wrong because they know how to get to sleep on their own.
I would try a routine and day by day slowing change to his new bedtime pattern. Good luck!

Kim - posted on 06/10/2010

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i know everyone has an opinion on this!i think a routine is a good start,our lilman was born on the 6th and has been sleeping thru since he was 10weeks,we got him in 'bath,bottle,bed' routine straight away.i work at a nursery and promised myself i wouldnt rock him to sleep,as ive seen so many parents that have made a rod for their own back,so have always just put him in his cot and if hes not tired he just babbles away and eventually falls asleep by himself.but if ur little one has always been rocked it will take a bit of work to teach him to feel confident to get himself to sleep.a couple of things that have definately helped us are a video monitor so that we could see him and didnt have to go in his room to check him,probably one of our best buys!another thing is harrison wont sleep without his grobag,which gives him the comfort of being wrapped but not as tight as swaddling!im sure there will be a few tears (urs and his) but with a bit of perseverance im sure you'll get there!good luck :)

Amy - posted on 06/10/2010

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with the late night sleeping.. move his bed time up by 5 mins a nite.. no point going from 12 to 7 all in one week!! My girl use to think 10 was a great bed time but it left no time for me and my partner to have alone time... so we day by day moved if forward 5 mins... now she goes to bed at 7 pm most nites which gives us alone time b4 my partner goes to bed ready for the early morning with our daughter!

I still rock my daughter to sleep now.. and she is nearly 13 months old. i am enjoying the time where she still wants to be near her mummy... however we have tried laying her down in her cot and just patting her back till she falls asleep and it does work!

Just remember every child is different.

Meisha - posted on 06/09/2010

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it took a while to get my son (whose now 13 mths) to be able to sleep on his own but it was a consistent routine and patience that did it in the end. and i never let him sleep past 4pm during his day nap. now i read him a book, give him his milk, read another book, then put him in his cot and he knows its bed time. he sleeps 7pm - 7am. its great - took a lot of patience but so worth it. we had a few nights where we let him cry until he went to sleep, he sounded really upset for 5 mins, then by 12 mins was alseep. only took a few nights of that and he was great after that. i think if he's still hysterically crying after 15 mins then letting him cry might not be a good idea though. the gradual approach worked for my son with stopping swaddling...one arm out for a week, then another for a week, then no swaddle at all and switched him to a sleeping bag.

just be patient and consistent and loving and you will get there in the end! good luck! and i agree with others that say if you dont mind rocking him to sleep then its ok, as you wont be doing it forever and its great to have those nice cuddly moments.

Claire - posted on 06/09/2010

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crystal, i think the family bed method would work for you as well. it can be tough having to share a bed but with my little girl it was only 2 weeks then she was in her own bed right next too us, gradually pushing her bed further away. in the next few weeks we are going to put her back in her own room, but i am so confident this will work.

you do have to remember as tough as it can be sharing, a full night sleep was well worth it

Claire - posted on 06/09/2010

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controlled crying was the worst thing i ever did, Robyn now hates her cot so much that she wont even go in it! it was so hard on her and so tough for me and ended in disaster anyway. but then i have a few friends who say it worked for them.

after i tried this i went to the library and took out every book i could find on sleeping (she was in our bed at this point due to being utterly terrified by the cot), after lots of research we decided to try the 'family bed technique' although most advice is to not start this before baby is 9 months old. i have to say it was the best thing we ever did. she sleeps fine, daddy, who works during the day gets plenty of cuddles and bonding and even more fantastically, she is now 13 months and in her own bed! (the bed is wedged between a wall and our bed very firmly so she cant roll out) the whole thing works a treat

there are a lot of people who do frown upon this method but i loved it and would recommend it to anyone who was struggling to give up a tough routine.

saying this, if your baby is fine in the cot i would be tempted to try every other method first!

Lisa - posted on 06/09/2010

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I agree that it needs to be gradual. We don't have the bedtime problem but we had other "addictions" like nursing to sleep, car seat for naps, etc. With anything babies are used to you have to move gradually with a little at a time. Swaddle a tad bit looser for a while. Then rock him until he's nearly asleep but not completely. He will definitely cry, but stick with whatever you start. Give it a few days - as long as you don't give in & rock him all the way to sleep he'll figure it out. Once he does better with going down drowsy, start rocking even less. Change one little aspect of his current routine until he's ok with it, then change another little part.

My son couldn't handle the go-in-to-reassure-after-10-minutes thing. Every time we went in it upset him more. Things would escalate & he'd be screaming his head off, rather than just regular crying when we left him. So we just didn't go in. The first night he cried for 30 minutes. The next night it was 10 minutes. He's done great ever since. Good luck!

Crystal - posted on 06/09/2010

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I think every child is definately different and it also depends on what you can handle. I think the "let them cry it out" method works for the most part. I didn't have the heart to do it with my son, but 6 years later now being a weathered mom :) i figured id try it with my daughter. When she was 9 months i let her cry one night for 20 minutes and she finally died down and fell asleep- the next night it was only like 9 minutes and so on until she just went to sleep when i laid her down. The trick though to start with is make sure they are tired enough when you are first trying this method. If they are wide awake it would be so much harder because they won't wear down as fast. The crying can be heartbraking though so be prepared.

I do need some advice now myself though. It worked great and she was sleeping on her own through the night for a couple months. And then she got really sick where i had to sleep holding her sitting upright on the couch for over a week cause when she laid flat shed cough so bad she couldnt breath. She got so used to this that when she got better i had to start over with the letting her cry it out and the first night i did it she cried so hard she threw up! Thought maybe it was a fluke so a week later i tried it again and she threw up again!! So i have not tried it again. Shes now a year old and wakes up 3-4 times a night and needs to be rocked to sleep every night and then alot of times wakes up as soon as i lay her in her crib and sometimes in the early morning we end up on the couch again. Anyone have any suggestions as to how to deal with this????

Nicole - posted on 06/09/2010

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To be honest, I think it all depends on the babies type of personality. We had the same issue (at around the 6 month mark) with the swaddle/rocking to sleep coinciding. She is VERY strong minded and I never thought anything was going to work. I can't say what will work for you, but this worked for us...

1. Start with one thing at a time. Break the swaddling first. I heard so many suggestions... loosen the swaddle, take one arm out... nothing worked for us. We just went cold turkey. It was a hard 2 to 3 weeks, but we were able to break the habit. My husband and I would just switch off every few hours she woke up and would rock her back to sleep.

2. After she was sleeping unswaddled well for a few weeks... we did the cry-it-out method. I was never a big believer in the "controlled crying" method. I don't want to sound harsh, but it never helped my daugther. She just got more upset when I would try and come back in and then leave again. I didn't feel it was fair to her. So... we went cold Turkey again. It was horrible... but it worked. Now, we put her to bed wide awake and she never cries and falls asleep on her own for bedtime (naps are still a little bit of a challenge).

I just want you to know that so many moms know what you are going through and how you are feeling. Somebody said it below... my biggest piece of advice for whatever you decide to do is be consistent with it. It wouldn't be fair to start CIO and then stop mid-way... then essentially you would have all that crying for no reason.

Best of luck!

Grace - posted on 06/08/2010

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My daughter too needs to be tap, usually what i will do is will gv her abt 10mins, and after that 10mins & she's still awake & playful, i will tell "mummy is going downstairs & u're goin to play urself"...she will start howling & yelling...until she's too tired & drop to sleep...or she will play on her own & drop off to sleep

Dana - posted on 06/08/2010

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You are probably going to have to let him cry it out. That is really hard to do ( I had to do it with my oldest) my one year old just started sleeping thru the night on his own at 3 months. I couldn't believe it... on the other hand my other 2 boys, I had to just let them cry it out.
Good luck

Lisa - posted on 06/08/2010

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Our baby has been sleeping in a pack and play since she started rolling and I am finally ready to move her to her "big girl crib" in her room which up until now has been a playroom. As for going to sleep, I change her diaper and sing twinkle twinkle while rocking her on the way to the bed, light dimmed to low, favorite blankie, small bunny, and unfortunately a pacifier still at 13m. I kiss her on the head and say "I love you" and "good night" then walk out of the room without hesitation and close the door completely. Sometimes she cries but not usually. If she does cry I give her 10 minutes to chill out on her own and if she continues I bring her out and she hangs out with us in the living room until she shows tired signs then we do it all over again - I might add that she's had approx. 4 oz. milk right before bed or as much of that 4 oz. that she wants.

Samantha - posted on 06/08/2010

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My daughter just turned 13 months and I have been trying that for what seems like forever!!! I still have to rock her to sleep...I am waiting for some good advice also :)

Allie - posted on 06/08/2010

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I think that the best thing for that is routine. My son actually slept in my bed for a while, but when I was to nervous to do it because he started becoming more mobile at 5 or 6 months, I just had to let him cry. The hardest thing for me was keeping his night routine the same, same bedtime, same way laying down, and stuff like that. Now I am starting to not give him a bottle before bed and I am just slowly taking off an ounce a week.

What really messed me up was one night I just couldn't take his sad cry, and I picked him up, and I had to start all over. GOOD LUCK!

Judi - posted on 06/08/2010

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At 8 months I was getting no sleep because I still had Punky in my bed and I was letting her fall asleep on her own. I read every book and tried several methods. Finally one worked. I did the routine bath, bed time story, and singing to her. Then I laid her in her bed and walked away. I sat downstairs crying the whole time she cried with my husband holding me. The first night she cried for 32 mins. The 2nd night was 3 mins. When she got sick I put her back in my bed but when she was better it was back to her bed. This method does work. It's hard but it works. The doctor said for night time don't return to the room. For nap only let them cry for 30 mins. This is not cruel, she had to learn. It was not easy but after trying the move a little further out of the room every night, the go back every 10 to 15 minutes, this is the only thing that worked. I should have taken the advice from other Mommies the first time around. Good luck.

Iris - posted on 06/07/2010

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enjoy it.... he wont need it too long..... or wait until he is very tired and place him in a quiet room ... alone, I wait until my son is ready and normally its around the same time everyday.... that helps also lots of excercise

Erin - posted on 06/07/2010

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I think my personal first step would be cutting out a nap! My daughter goes to bed around nine, sleeps until 10ish and goes down for nap between 12&1 and sleeps for 2+hours. We used to swaddle her when she was an infant, and she loved it, but once she started getting out of it we stopped. We've also never really had a problem getting her down at night but we started with good habits from day one. We never let her sleep in our bed, although I would appreciate it at times, I was always too scared something would happen. We also ALWAYS put her down awake so that she would learn to fall asleep on her own (including if she woke up.) I think that was the biggest thing. She never even really cries when we put her down for bed. Sometimes she plays for a little and doesn't fall asleep right away but rarely cries. Good luck to you!

Laura - posted on 06/07/2010

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My son is one year old also and I have to rock him to sleep or go to sleep with him. He will not just go down in a crib or anywhere else for that matter!! I just keep thinking how he will only be this little once and one day he won't need me or want me close to him! Hang in there I know it is frustrating .

Sonia - posted on 06/07/2010

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My oldest daughter slept in our bed with us for about 2 yrs. When we decided we needed to get her to sleeping in her own bed (which was a twin) I started by laying with her until she fell asleep.. Then I began sitting on the end of her bed. The next step I made was to tell her that I needed to go check on something or use the bathroom and I'd come back and check on her when I was done. Usually by the time I came back she would be sound asleep. And within a few weeks time all I had to do was lay her in bed and she would fall asleep all on her own. Since your son is still in a crib you could do something similar like rubbing his back, then sitting in a chair next to his crib and each night move it closer to door. Eventually you won't need to be in the room at all. Good luck! This is never easy, but this method should be easier than making them cry it out. That was always to hard for me to do.

Vicky - posted on 06/07/2010

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you can get lots of different advice & then get so confused so the only way to do it properly is to get some books & understand how to manage this problem otherwise when they are screaming their heads off you get flustered & dont follow through with what you set out to do. I dont know how you have had the patience to attend to your baby so much for 1 year in terms of getting him to sleep- i did it for 8 months with my baby & hated every single night because i just couldnt focus & get my action plan right as it would take up so much energy! I recommend 2 books that have great plans to get your baby putting himself to sleep everytime as well as what babies need at different ages in terms of sleep so you are not putting them down to sleep when they are not ready.If you read any books just make yourself some quick notes to refresh your memory during the time when you are implementing your strategy & remind yourself that it will pay off!
1) SLEEP RIGHT, SLEEP TIGHT- Le-Ann Williams, Rosey Cummings, Karen Houghton. A PRACTICAL PROVEN GUIDE TO SOLVING YOUR BABY'S SLEEP PROBLEMS. Sleep solutions for your child from birth to 4 years. (Written by an Australian sleep service/school so guaranteed to work!)
2) Baby Bliss- Jo Ryan
& yes routine is a major part of this task as your baby- (now toddler so even more stubborn!) needs to know what is happening at that stage of the night & they get the best sleep prior to midnight so preferably 7pm is ideal bedtime & drop the swaddle for a sleeping bag as this gives them the same cue that its for bedtime only just like the swaddle. Best of luck!!!

Lacye - posted on 06/06/2010

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it's been said before but i'll say it again, let him cry. i live in an apartment and the first week or 2 when i started getting my daughter lily to sleep by herself was rough. she would scream until 2 in the morning. yeah i had some upset neighbors but they were the ones who didn't have kids and didn't understand. i was in the room with her and she had me in her sight the entire time (my apartment is small so she sleeps in the room with me but in her playpen). after a while he will understand that the crib is his bed and the big bed is mama and daddy's bed. it will be hard. but it's just something you have to work on. yes you will have some sleepless nights but after you get him used to sleeping on his own then you can start making a sleeping schedule and get him to stick to it. i hope i've been helpful.

Susan - posted on 06/06/2010

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Hi with the swaddling part. I started out slowly.... just left it loose when I swaddled, then left an arm out etc etc and eventually I stopped swaddling and my daughter Lily was completely fine with it.

Ashley - posted on 06/05/2010

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My son was a breastfeed baby till he was 2 days b4 he was 1 then I got great advice from my friend. All I did was I layed him in his crib and gave him a bottel and I stood by his bed and sang to him if that didn't work I put on that gay show yo gabba gabba. And let me tell u that show is a wounderful way to get my son to sleep. Hope this will work for you

Kimberly - posted on 06/05/2010

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We had to do the cry it out method where we'd put him down let him cry for about 15-20mins then we'd go and sooth him then do it again until he was asleep... after that we expanded the time. It helps them to learn how to sooth themselves and to help them get the hang of a schedule, now he goes to sleep around 9pm and quickly and hardly cries.

Chauntel - posted on 06/05/2010

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When my son was 9 months old i started the cry it out... it took about a week and he was going to sleep on his own. Every so often he will have his moments where he cries for a bit before he falls asleep now but it works!

Jennifer - posted on 06/05/2010

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I always said that I would never let my child "cry it out"...but here we are. After three nights of controlled crying my son, who is now one and a few days, has been sleeping through the entire night since he was nine months old. For us the best thing that works is having a strong bed time routine. He comes to anticipate dinner, bath , bottle and snuggles, and then bed time....I needed to remind myself during the first few days that I am the parent and have some control over how our nights play out. Yes, its stressful, and it can be hard. But my sons occasional whimper at bed time seems to stem more from being exhausted versus being scared or upset. He might cry for a minute or so on some nights, but not routinely. It has also helped his nap times. Prior to doing this I couldnt ever get him to take a nap..now he sleeps for two to three hours in the afternoon...amazing for all of us! On a side note I know when he needs me because he doesnt routinely wake up in the night, as Rebekah stated above. And my son knows that when he needs me I come to him

Rebekah - posted on 06/05/2010

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Rebecca, I know when my daughter needs me b/c she'll wake up crying in the night. Yes, you read that right. After the initial 3 days of controlled crying, she's slept all night. So now if she wakes in the night, I know somethings wrong. Prior to teaching her to self soothe, she would wake in the night and I never knew if she was sick, teething, or just wanting me to put her back to sleep.

Rebecca - posted on 06/05/2010

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There's no need to let them cry! Take a look at Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution. I transitioned my daughter (at one) from nursing every couple of hours all night, down at 10 up at 6, to 8PM bedtime with one waking at 11:30, and up at 7. We're still working on the last waking, but its better. The secret is a routine. For us its dinner bath nurse book song. She falls asleep in her bed most nights without any problem. Letting a baby (or toddler) cry themselves to sleep just teaches them that you won't come when they call for you. I know many parents who have tried it only to find out their baby stopped crying- but still didn't sleep. Besides, if you are letting them cry how will you know when they really need you?

Claire - posted on 06/05/2010

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I have twin boys who have just turned one. I know it is controversial but I did the Gina Ford rountines for twins and it couldn't have gone better. Now I feed them their dinner at 5pm, bath at 6pm and bottle at 6.30pm. I clean their teeth and then my husband and I sit together on our bed and he reads them a story. Then I pop them in their sleeping bags and put them in their cots in the dark for 7pm. They mostly lie down and go off within 5-10mins although sometimes if they are not tired they may grissle a little and take a bit longer. To get to this stage from your current one will take a while but not as long as you would think. Kids pick things up very quickly and habits can be broken in a few days. It is horrible to hear your child crying but at this age kids know how to play mums to get their own way (in an innocent way - if you know what I mean!). Good luck!

Kim - posted on 06/04/2010

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Mine is ok going to bed, but I let him stay up until he is ready for bed, usually around 10. My problem is every night around 2am he decides to wake up & cry until I put him in the bed with me. I'm a sucker & do everytime. I love sleeping with him but DH is over it.

Christina - posted on 06/04/2010

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I agree with the whole routine thing. Do things in a certain order every night. My son doesn't have a problem with bedtime. I think it's because he knows that it's time for bed. Now, he will sit up and play with a stuffed animal for a few minutes, but after that he goes right to bed. Then again, we started out letting him cry, He knows it doesn't work on us.

Mindy - posted on 06/04/2010

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I tried that 10 minute interval stuff and my son ended up getting so worked up his turned bright red and threw up all over the room. He was crying and screaming not able to catch his breath. So needless to say I gave up on that for a while!

Nicole - posted on 06/04/2010

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For naps, my 1 yr old and I cuddle on the couch, so little help there. But at night, we do the bedtime routine, get him good and drowsy, and sit by his crib while he's in it. At first we had to keep laying him back down, then just hold a hand or stroke hair until he's asleep. Now I can read a grown-up book next to him until those eyes shut. But I don't walk away until he's asleep.

Leticia - posted on 06/04/2010

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Hey Leanne...any luck with changing your son's bedtime arrangements?
I really believe in a routine. It took my son some getting used to, but he now knows when it's "night night time". After he eats his dinner he will play for about an hour. He then takes his bath. After I give him a little massage with baby lotion and then we read 3 books to him as he drinks his bottle. Most nights he is ready to fall asleep as I lay him in his crib. Some nights he is not. But whether he is ready to sleep or not...he still goes in his crib at about the same time every night. In the beginning he cried, but I'm fairly sure it's just because he wanted to continue playing. He could have played all night if I let him. It took a good week or so to get him into this routine. And it was extremely hard for me to hear him cry. But you know they are ok and not hurt. They are fed and clean. They are just crying because they are not doing what they have been allowed to do in the past. They are smarter than we give them credit for! My son now goes into his crib without crying and will fall asleep on his own. While I do stress a routine, you know your son the best. And if you feel like you need to hold him or rock him before putting him down...you do what you feel you need to do. Good luck!

Lucille - posted on 06/04/2010

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Hi -
we also use a routine. feed at 5-5:30, play for half an hour, bath at 6-6:30, feed and wind down from 6:30 - 7:15, go to his room rock for two seconds while I kiss him goodnight with the lights off then put him down. I avoid all eye contact though once he is down, as if I look at him he will moan for me. I just turn around and walk out.
You have to stick to it though, even if your baby cries. Perhaps time it, and at first every 5 minutes go in and rock him for a second then put him down. Don't let the baby fall asleep in your arms.

Rebekah - posted on 06/03/2010

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You can: swaddle him less and less, hold him but rock him less and less, lay him down drowsy but awake, or do the controlled crying thing. If you are consistent any of the above should work. Some things would obviously take much longer, but that's a matter of what you prefer.

I've taught my daughter to be comfortable falling asleep in her own bed from early on. I do nurse my daughter and rock her a little before putting her down to sleep, but she's usually awake when I put her into her crib. The times that she might not be quite ready to go to sleep she'll cry a little, but it's usually just a protest cry (like, "mama I want to play not sleep!") When she was just learning to fall asleep we did the controlled crying and within a week she could put herself to sleep.

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