Daycare questions

Jennifer - posted on 03/01/2011 ( 11 moms have responded )

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I've recently enrolled my son in daycare. For most of his life he's either been home with me, or with a friend of the family or an in home daycare. Since he's been in day care i've noticed a difference in him. I've been told he cries off and on at daycare. When we get home he is glued to me more than usual, seems ready to cry at the drop of a hat and is having trouble sleeping at night. I was wondering if this is all normal and if there was anything i could do help easy his anxiety. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

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Katie - posted on 03/02/2011

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I have yet to have my own child in daycare, but I was a preschool assistant for five years and a preschool teacher for five years, so I understand coming from "the other side", if you will! Some suggestions-act happy and excited when you are taking him to daycare, talk about all the fun things he will do, and make sure to always tell him that you will be back to get him. After daycare, talk to him about what he did, what he ate, etc. Children are affected by how you perceive a situation and if your feet are dragging, then so will theirs! (as hard as it is!) Also, one thing that I found made things worse was when mom or dad stuck around for a long time. Hopefully the daycare is trying hard to redirect your son and involve him in activities, rather than let him sit and cry.

It will be hard for everyone for awhile, but as long as you all work together and communicate, it will be okay!! Be strong, mommy. :)

Kim - posted on 03/09/2011

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Perfectly normal. My daughter started daycare in December, and she had the same reaction at first. She had stayed at home almost exclusively before that, and she had the same sort of separation anxiety for the first week or two. She's just fine now, and does great even when I drop her off - going off to play on her own or holding her arms out for her teacher! :) And she's going to bed at a reasonable hour now, since she's wearing herself out at "school." She used to stay up late like us, but she has a much better schedule these days. She's also learning a LOT, which I love! It will be tough here for a little while, but stick with it, and it'll be worth it!

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Meagan - posted on 03/24/2011

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My son has been in daycare for a little less than a year now and he has his good days and his bad days. I know that his teachers and surroundings are amazing. The staff is so sweet, the kids are nice and he's even learned to say and recognize part of the alphabet and numbers and he's not even 2 yet. It's hard when they cry when you leave them, but it's good for them to interact with kids their own age. They see other kids learning things and they want to learn them too. My son clings to me too, but I know that he misses me. I know that it's the right decision and will make going to actual school a ton easier once he gets older. If the school is still upsetting him, you may want to try another school. It may not be the right environment for him.

Paula - posted on 03/23/2011

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As a childcare teacher and as a mother I can see positives and negatives in long daycare and it all comes down to the quality of the staff and managment. Your child sounds anxious like mine was so i chose family daycare instead while im at work in daycare! Some young toddler rooms with a large group of children in them can be daunting for a young child who isnt able to cope. Look at the service very closley which is my professional advice,ask questions and observe!

Jennifer - posted on 03/15/2011

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Katherine, I told him after day 3 that we were going to school and he needed to be a big boy. If he was a big boy and didn't pitch a fit when i dropped him off he'd get a stickey (a.k.a. sticker) as long as he was good all day. I picked him up from school that day and was told he was good all day. He still clings a bit when we get there and will cry for about 5 minutes but he is fine the rest of the day. I've even watched him when i go to pick him up when he hasn't seen me and he is fine mostly. Not there all the way yet, but he's definitely better. Thank you everyone for your kind words and advice. :)

Katherine - posted on 03/15/2011

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i have 3 girls all of them have been to daycare my eldest now three came to work with me since she was 10 weeks old and she also did the crying when i wasnt around they all go through it at some point my 22 month old has just gone through that faze for the last month or so and now she is fine again and kicks me out the door. and the youngest who has just turned 10months was fine to begin with and around 6 months became very clingy she didnt even go to her dad, is now 100% better i can leave her and it doesnt faze her. All i can suggest is perservere as i have been on both sides as the staff member and the parent, being the parent is so much harder. is to make sure you tell him that you will be back and mabe something like we will have a special story when i come back to get you ( a little kind of bribe) then he may look forward to it at the end of the day hope tjhis helps

Jennifer - posted on 03/13/2011

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Adela, He goes 5 days a week...they don't offer part time day care in very many places here. :(

Adela - posted on 03/12/2011

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Maybe take him for visits on the days he is not there, you stay with him for an hour or so?. Would they offer orientation visits? he can then become a bit more familiar with the teachers and what they do?
I hope he settles soon

Rebecca - posted on 03/10/2011

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It could actually be just an age thing - my 22 month old has been at home with me 4 days per week and with his grandparents 3 days per week since he was 8 months old - but recently he has got very clingy and always wants his mumma and is also not a great sleeper all of a sudden when he used to be the best ever!!! so im guessing its just an age related thing as nothing else has changed, so in your case dont fret about it, im sure he has lots of fun and daycare!best of luck

Jennifer - posted on 03/02/2011

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I keep trying to tell myself that he's going to be learning more than i can teach him here. That in the end the structure of class will be better for him.
Today he was at both end of the emotional scale. When we first left for "school" as we call it he couldn't wait to get out the door kept saying "school, school" but as soon as he saw the building he started with tears.

Katie - posted on 03/02/2011

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I also wanted to add that this is a HUGE change in your little guys life! If your daycare is anything like the ones that i worked at, your son will be on more of a schedule and in a more structured environment (not that you don't have structure at home, but it's just a different kind of structure!) He's probably feeling like his world is a bit topsy-turvey all of a sudden. Keep in mind that once he is used to this, being in a daycare will expand his social skills and his world will be opened up to many new, fun, & exciting things! :)

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