terrible twos at 16 months??

Holly - posted on 01/06/2013 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My son is about to be 16 months and he us throwing fits like a two year old. I'm not sure how to fix his behavior. Throwing himself on the floor hitting himself and me and throwing things at me along with anyone who is in distance. He yells too much also. What do i do. It's making me feel like I'm doing something wrong :(.

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Aline - posted on 01/10/2013

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My daughter went through the "Terrible Twos" when she was 18 months. We are from Brazil and traveled to NY on vacation, just imagine the chaos! Change Routine + Terrible twos!
Almost gone mad! I've read once (and don't remember where!) that the "terrible twos" begins shortly after the first year and can extend to almost 3 years old!
When Anna started the tantrum, I just certifying that she would not get hurt on something, then went out to encourage her not to cry even more!
You're not doing anything wrong, it's a very difficult time indeed! Have patience, strength and faith that everything will go through when you least expect it.
Xoxo
Aline

Jennifer - posted on 01/10/2013

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We use time outs for our 16 month old. They aren't very long but they seem to work for us. Also, we have many routines tjroughout the day so she is familiar with what is going to happen today. Thwre aren't too many outbursts. You aren't doing anything wrong I'm sure. Kids will be kids. Younger than 2 is a little early to send a kid to their rooming to calm down. I don't think they can quite comprehend this at such an early age.

Ariana - posted on 01/06/2013

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I would do what Brittney suggested but also try to ignore this behavior when you can. Yeah my son started at 18 months, and unlike Brittney it continued on through when he was 2 and luckily started to become less frequent by the time he was 3 (he still kicked off every once in a while but not nearly as much as when he was 2).

Unfortunately until he's 2 time-outs and some other tactics that you could use don't work as well when they're 1.

At this age I would ignore him throwing himself on the floor/hitting himself/yelling. You can't force him not to do that but you can leave where he is and pretend that he isn't doing it. If he tries to hit you I would tell him he needs to calm down and either walk away, or if he follows you, put him in his room or a playpen and tell him he needs to calm down, and there is no hitting. Don't do this as a 'time-out' but as a 'calm down'. You can't reason with a child throwing a tantrum but he also can't hit you. When he does calm down you should try to talk to him and say 'no hitting, touch gently'. If he throws things at you I would take whatever he's thrown away and if that doesn't seem to phase him once again either walk away or move him somewhere else to calm down.

If at all possible ignore this behavior, if he realizes you aren't paying attention to him his behavior becomes ineffective.

Also afterwards try to figure out what was going on and give him the words to his feelings, like 'you were so MAD'. But during the behavior you can't stop him.

Brittney - posted on 01/06/2013

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Sounds like it to me, my daughter went through terrible twos at 15-17 months, she's 2 now and nothing. She would scream at the top of her lungs, thrash around, hurt herself, refuse to go potty..etc Start offering choices..like "which pjs do you want to wear?" (then hold up 2 choices), "what do you want to eat for snack?" (have 2-3 choices to offer). Avoid yes/no questions as the answer will be 'NO!', start giving warnings like "5 minutes until bedtime" or "you need to use words, tell mommy why you are upset" When children become frustrated, they tantrum. a firm "no hit" should be good. I always sent my daughter to her room and told her to come out when she calms down. Now that she is 2, I thought for sure the terrible twos would be back, but so far so good! I still give her choices I just add a few extra things.

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