Bi-Polar Depressed, and anxiety disorder, single mom of 3 needing help

Sara - posted on 09/30/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Hello, I'm new here, and I tried to post a message eariler, dont know if it made it, so if this might be twice. I am in recovery from being a drug addict. I have 3 years clean, and have custody of my 3 kids. They are really great, but I keep getting overwhelmed by all the stuff I have to do. It is so easy to get upset and yell. My mood is always all over the place. I'm on med's 3 different kinds, and it still isnt working, and it's been 2 1/2 years I've been on these. I want to know how do you other mothers do it, I mean the soccer, t-ball, church, girl scouts, etc. I stay in the disipline mode, and am not much of a nurturer. I sit and see my kids wanting my love, but it's almost like I cant get out of my own head long enough to give it. I am always so busy, and I have lots of other excuses, but at the end of the day, I know that my kids just want me. I have had to appologize to my daughter, my oldest, she's 9, and tell her that it's not her fault that mommy was being loud and mean, that I have to take medicine, and sometimes it doesnt work right. I got diagnosed when I was in rehab, and you have to have a mental disorder so medicaid will pay for it, they tried me on depression med's, but they made me feel like I was on speed, so then it was bi-polar depressed. Anyway, I know I need to get re-evaluated, but I also work 40 hours a week, with hourly pay... Can someone tell me how they get thru all this stuff. I could really use the help. Thanks!

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4 Comments

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Jennifer - posted on 10/27/2009

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Hey we all get stuck in ruts sometimes, I am in one now. I am on the computer and depressed and I should be playing with my son, but I know things will get better, they always do, and happiness isnt something that happens to you.. It is a choice. It really is, I have sought happens through things, people places all my life and it doesnt work...Happy is a choice...try using that as your mantra...it is what i am doing right now and it is working a bit...stay in touch...Smiles Jenn

Sara - posted on 10/06/2009

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Thanks Jenn, that means a lot to me for your honest response. I will try and do better with this. I've been told this before, and the past few days to a week, I have been doing better with this. I've started new medicine tho, and I'm sure that has something to do with it, but no matter what it is, it has helped with becoming closer to my kids, and I have noticed a change already. Hope we get to talk again soon. Thanks again Jenn!

Jennifer - posted on 09/30/2009

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And by the way I dont get all the stuff done that I need too, but oh well my kids are happy and thats what matters, other people don't like it sometimes but thats too bad, kids are only kids for a short period of time, and this aint no dress rehersal....that's just my two cents though.

Jennifer - posted on 09/30/2009

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Well you have had the revelation that all your kids want is you so...I have had this too, as I am constantly saying no, don;t touch that, making meals, cleaning up and my own worries. But when I recognized this I made a change. Sometimes at least once every other day. I just plop down on the floor, let the kids crawl on me, play trucks with my son, bounce my daughter on my lap, and read a couple of books, small things, i make time before dinner, it takes about 1/2 hour to 45 mins, but there is a definite change in me and my kids since I made that change. I get so overwhelmed at times, and granted your kids are older than mine so playing trucks may not apply, but take 15 mins a day per kid, and make it there time. It will change both your lives. Regardless of our diagnosis, we are the controller of our destinies, and our childrens for now. So what if the laundry doesnt get folded tonight or the dishwasher is a mess in the morning. You dont get awards for that stuff anyway. Give your children the love they need now, small simple things go a long way into making happy healthy children. Hope this helps

Im thinking of you.

Jenn