1st deployment...

Catherine - posted on 04/10/2009

Just stay busy. During his first deployment we did not have kids, so I taught full time and got a master's degree. I lived with my parents, and although it was great for saving money it suuuucked. Now we are working our way through his second deployment. He left the day after our son hit 4 weeks, so we have just spent a lot of time on the webcam. I'm staying at our home this time, and so far it is much better than living at home for me. However, at times it really stinks knowing that your nearest family is 4,337 miles away.

Susan - posted on 04/06/2009

I am at the end of oour 1st deployment.  It has been really hard.  I work fulltime, have a son and 2 dogs, and my female ended up having 6 puppies (not from my other dog).  I have my in laws here, but can't really count on them.  My husband is in the Canadian Airforce in Kandahar so he is relatively safe, doesn't have to leave camp.  We get to talk to him via webcam on Skype every day, emails all the time, presents in the mail, and 35 mins of telephone a week.  It has gone by fast, but it didn't feel like it. I am disabled so I also had to hire people to come in to clean the house , shovel snow, and do dog duty.  Keep smiling,  send him lots of pictures and care packages, remember they dont get peanut butter there.

keep in touch, susan

Tasha - posted on 04/06/2009

My husbands first deployment we were stationed in Italy. I just stayed there but it's a lot easier meeting people overseas and of course a lot more to keep busy with visiting places and what not. I'd say it all depends on how you feel and what you need to do to help you out. I wouldn't necesarrly say that the first one is the hardest. I've been through three and it certainly doesn't get easier if anything I found it only gets harder. but that's just me.

Meghan - posted on 04/03/2009

Our first deployment I was still in college so we were married but not living together he was in NC and I was in WA. I literally found out that we were expecting on the phone with him when he arrived in Kuwait before he went in country. But anyway, I stayed really busy with school and I was close to home but not too close. I was about a 6hr drive from home and family. But I did have all my girlfriends from school. Our most recent deployment I was pregnant again...what a surprise...lol, I stayed in NC with our son and in our own home. Im a very independent person and I really like to have my own space. Don't get me wrong I would have loved to have been a bit closer to home but it worked well for us. I did make wonderful friends when we were stationed in NC. I stayed involved with church, my friends, and playdates for my son. I would say personally since I have done it both ways its better to just stay where you are. Its an awful lot of trouble to move across the country and really only for a short period of time...I know it doesnt seem like it now but it will go by quickly if you stay busy.

Sarah - posted on 04/03/2009

I went back to my home town to be around family. It made things much easier.

Jessica - posted on 04/03/2009

I just went through my first deployment, and I gotta say, everyone always telling me that it will go by so quick, time will just fly by, that never happened, and definitely didnt make me feel any better.  I stayed here and California when he left, cuz the only family I have is all back on the east coast, and there was no way that I myself could pack up our house, get it into storage, then drive across the country just to stay in my parents house, which would of been cramped and all.  Think it would of been ten times easier if I would of went back to Florida regardless of how difficult it would of been on me to get there, im extremely shy, and not very talkative, so never made any new friends, pretty much just stayed at home and did creative things with my kids to keep us all busy.  Still went by slow as ever, but now my husband will be back in about 12 days, all the hard times I went through dont seem to matter anymore, just knowing that he will be here in less then two weeks makes it all better!

Dia - posted on 04/03/2009

This is my first deployment as well I have three boy and last night it hit me this is my husbands last weekend here he leaves friday 10 April. Some times i think i cant do this and he isnt even gone yet. i really look to these post for engouragment from all you if they are foe someone else for for me.

Auri - posted on 04/03/2009

This is my hubbys first deployment as well and it hurts me that he is going to miss our daughters first year of her life but the webcam chatting is the best invention ever for these hard times. I actually moved back to my parents house because I knew that if I was to be stuck in a home without my family to talk to (due to the 6 hour difference) I would cry and be sad that my husband wasn't with his daughter and me. It all really depends on how you are. If you know you are strong and can pull through on your own then stay where you are but if you are like me and sometimes need your family to help you through all of this, it's best to go where you feel more comfortable and have help. Wish your family the best and god bless.

Antonia - posted on 04/03/2009

I am in pretty much the same boat you are Meghan.. My hubby is waiting for the arrival of our son in a few days and then he will be leaving to join his ship, which is out on a 6 month deployment right now.  This is our first deployment as a married couple.  I have one child who is school aged, so going "back home" isn't really any option until after June.  I think am just going to apply the same kind of attitude I had when we were dating/engaged and he deployed.. Just try to keep busy, which I am sure won't be hard with a newborn. :) and also  depend on emails and phone calls to get me through till he comes home.  I probably will try and go visit family sometime mid to late July, just to get a change of scene.  I would look into support groups and also any wives that might get together for activities.  Socializing seems to help the time fly by a little more quickly.  :)

Irene - posted on 04/02/2009

My husband went to Korea back in 2003 my oldest was 3 and my youngest was 6 months. I stayed here in NC. We bought a house when we got here in 2000. It was hard the first few months. Phone calls and letters helped. When he got back from Korea we went to Germany. We were there for 2 months before he left for Iraq. I will tell you the internet helped a lot. Get a webcam so you can chat on yahoo. The boys went a year with out seeing their dad while he was in Korea so picking him up at the airport wasn't what I thought it would be. They didn't go near him. Took a few hours for them to even play with him. But having the webcam and them being able to see him every day or when we talked helped out every bit. Plus surround yourself with others who husbands are deploying too. I stayed in Germany but in my building all our husbands left. So we all bonded and took care of each other's children and looked out for one another. Have family around too would help. So I went 2 yrs back to back with him being gone. Take lots of pictures to send him, have them draw pictures, talk about him and show them pictures of him. I hope some of this helps.