Have A Lil boy thats 1. Husbands in Navy. We Want A Lil Girl. How Long Should We Wait??

Kellilynn - posted on 09/25/2009

To be completely honest, I would wait to have another child. Let your son grow a little more and become a little more independant before trying to bring a baby into the mix. Mothers do do it all the time, but with my own personal experience, I'm glad I waited. Your son is still at the point in his life where he depends on Mommy and Daddy for everything. Maybe when he's 21/2-3 that would be a good time to start trying. The Navy has classes, just call your nearest Fleet and Family Support Center to find out which classes they're providing and when the classes are and they even do counseling, for free. You can also contact the base chapel or even the hopsital to find out if they have classes. You're trying to get pregnant and you want it so bad that you're psyching yourself out and tricking your body into thinking your pregnant when you aren't. Try to lean more towards your husbands approach, if it happens it happens, if not, then just keep trying but dont try too hard :)

Angela - posted on 09/16/2009

I would say wait, but again this decision is up to you. Is your husband on shore or sea duty? If on Sea duty, I again would say wt becaue a ships schedule can be stressful and stressors can lead to feelings we all at times try not to feel(i.e., depression). If however he is on shoer duty, this is a good time to have children, because he will b there more to help you.

In addition, cost considerations should be thought of. 2 children in diapers is not only expensive, but can be stressful. I know when i had m second child things got twice as hard. After awhile you will get the han of it, but in during the first couple ofmonths it will be stressful and adjustments will need to be made.

Also, you stated you both want a little girl; however this is a 50%-50% shot; you have to be sure when you decide to get pregnant that you will be happy with either sex.

I wish you the best and please make the decision that is best for your family, just remember to look at all the positive and negative aspects first and way them before you decide this life changing event.

Renee - posted on 09/16/2009

I personally say wait. You'll have two kids in diapers most likely which can be a lot of money. My daughter is almost two (on Halloween). We plan to get pregnant next summer so my daughter will be 3 1/2 by the time the baby would be born. At that age, she will be able to tell us what's wrong, be potty trained, help out with things, and learn to nurture the baby a little better than she does with her dolls. Right now, she gets pretty jealous anytime we hold or give another child attention. So I say wait even though I really want to be pregnant. I think I'd be the same way too...get depressed if I wasn't pregnant and thought I was. Making a new life is a wonderful thing. Don't get down if it takes awhile. Some people try for their first kid sometimes for 10 years so be glad you have your son. If you want to get pregnant have your intimate time 2 weeks after the start of your period and the 2 days before and after that 2 week point. It may increase the odds. Good luck!

Sarah - posted on 09/15/2009

Well I'd say go for it also, but dont try too hard. Just have fun trying. Everything is meant to be. Trust in God, he knows whats best. plus in the process of trying, enjoy both your husband and your son. I wouldnt get depressed about it. You've only started thinking about having a baby. That's only my opinion. I didnt try and I got pregnant.

Lorraine - posted on 09/15/2009

Well I think that I would just go for it! Don't get depressed, just think that it will happen when it's right. Also the more you stress, the less likely you are to get pregnant. It always seems to happen when you least expect it. One question though, how long have you been married? If it's only been for a little bit, then the only reason to wait would be to enjoy each other. This is especially true if you never had to be alone as a wife during a hubby's deployment. It will be very hard with two kids alone. If your husband is gonna be around for a couple of months to help you during the birth of the little one, then everything should be okay. Just remember that being in the military has a lot of benefits and even more people to help you. All you have to do is ask for it! If you need someone to talk to in person, go onto the base and look for the Navy Fleet and Family. This is a very great program that offers a lot of information. Hope that this helps!

Julia Kat - posted on 09/15/2009

By professional help I meant, psychological. She made note that when her test failed she got depressed. That is no good for a husband who may not always be around and a baby to still tend to. Fertility wise, they wont even consider recommending you most of the time until you've been actively trying for a year. Do not be discouraged by getting the help of a psychologist it is nothing to be ashamed of. And it is better for you and your family if you do considering the facts, before starting to "try" for another baby. But, I also agree with Chelsea... You should both enjoy what freedoms you have right now as parents to one child. I waited nearly 9 years before having my second baby and while I love him more than the world, sometimes I think about how much easier my days were without 2 children! :) The more you have the harder it gets and the less time you will have to yourself. Enjoy the one for awhile longer.

Chelsea - posted on 09/15/2009

I think it is very early to seek professional help. Even though the military now pays for some fertility treatment, I don't think you are going to have a hard time getting pregnant. I would just suggest waiting to take another pregnancy test until you are at least a week late. I do agree with the other post about how you can't garuntee which sex (we all know that) the baby will be. For instance, my husband was dying for a family with four boys. We now have two girls. And yes we still want a boy and yes we will try to have more, but we wanted four children to begin with so boy or girl, we will be happy. So what you need to ask yourself is, "if I have another boy, will I be okay with that?"

Another thing, until your son is 18 mo, you are not totally healed from your previous pregnancy, so I would suggest waiting if only for that reason. Yes, people have healthy children who are much closer in age, but it would just be best for your body. And then your son with be old enough to walk almost all the time (lets face it, little legs get tired easily) and maybe even potty trained! (don't hold your breath) Your young though, and I would suggest waiting to enjoy life as a mother with only one child and a husband that you can give your (almost) undivided attention to.

Julia Kat - posted on 09/15/2009

Seems like you have a lot going on. First off I would say that you should seek the help of a professional before you start trying. Don't take this wrong but sometimes it can take over a year to get pregnant, the last thing your husband and baby needs is an upset and depressed Mommy. Secondly, you can't promise a girl. I know, two boys so far and I've known people to go six boys in a row while trying for a girl. You should both be happy just having a healthy baby. You have one of the best medical coverages in the world! Contact Military1 Source and ask them about clinical psychologists. See a doctor before you start trying so you have someone there for you if it fails or takes longer than you mentally can handle. You need maturity, strength and a little help and support. When the time is right for you, it will happen!